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Thread: am i infj or infp?i'm open minded to any suggestions outside of this too thanks

  1. #61
    4x9 Array cascadeco's Avatar
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    Oct 2007
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    Quote Originally Posted by neptunesnet View Post
    I know this thread is old, but I'm going to comment anyway.


    About 99% of the members who have commented in this thread disagree, but I have an INFJ friend (confirmed) who has a tendency of telling things I've told her that I didn't exactly want revealed to other people. It wasn't done maliciously but as a way to connect with people or to "build bridges," as someone else said, amongst people. I find it annoying, but I understand why she does it. Although she's private about herself, she definitely reveals things about other people who are close to her in order to make connections. Very Fe.

    Personally, the distinction between INFJ private and INFP private is the INFJ is graceful at concealing things about herself. In small, intimate groups she talks freely about friends and family but manages not to mention a single detail about herself while the INFP keeps all fo that to herself and is more hesitant when asked about details of herself, friends, and family. The INFP Fi likes to internalize things while the INFJ Fe, to a certain extent, likes affirmation. The INFJ has a talent of never talking about herself but always around herself.

    Also, I am relatively vocal about my values. I'll speak my mind on an issue if I feel there is an obvious double standard or inconsistency in someone else's argument. My INFJ friend, on the other hand, will just shut up so as not to hurt any feelings. I couldn't even imagine ignoring something offensive said or done because I wanted to keep the group "harmonious." Fe will do that for you. I, the INFP, will put up a good fight when it comes to my values.

    I hope that helped some.
    I don't doubt that your friend is INFJ; however, taking the behaviors/traits of ONE INFJ that you know and applying it to INFJ's in general doesn't make a whole lot of sense. Neither does singling out one phrase/behavior of a whole slew of comments that a person writes about himself, and deciding on their type based on one element alone. NFJ's (and any type) will certainly have general trends in common, but there will be quite a lot of variability in the same type even so.
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  2. #62
    man-made Array neptunesnet's Avatar
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    Sep 2009
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    To Lauren, yeah, I see your point.
    I was trying to add (although I did a poor job) to the thread that not all INFPs babblemouth. The implication in many of the posts here was "Oh, you whine? INFP." annd that's a false deduction.
    Obviously, from your and cascadeco's posts, not all INFJs do this, and it's not something that is particularly type-related.

    Maybe you should probably express this to the OP since she, too, seemed to be confused about it.

    And cascadeco, I know more than one INFJ (3) well and they all have the same "problem." It's certainly not an isolated case. I merely used that one as the paradigm for the others, but okay, I see that you can't relate to it, so my theory was flawed. No big deal.

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