I am an INFJ male in my early 40's.
100% I 69% N 71% F 56% J
I'm pretty much your typical INF though I have qualities of both J and P, and am quite comfortable exercising my ST side as well.
I prefer structure, but don't have a problem with spontaneity. I can intuitively take the emotional temperature of a room within seconds, yet can also intentionally take in all the sensory information to back up that conclusion. I am very much an emotional being, yet have no problem taking advantage of my logical side if need be.
For the longest time, because of how I was raised, I had no clue who I was, personality wise.
My mom raised me as an ST, lots of puzzles and games all over the house, so I have a pretty good handle on the whole logic/sensory thing. I eventually came to realize that she did so to try and help me deal with my overbearing step-father. He pretty much ruled out emotion as legitimate for a boy, demanded logical explanations for any/everything (intuition was "women's prerogative"), and constantly informed me that I was worthless, and would never amount to anything.
It helps having a best friend/confidant that understands my situation and experienced my childhood firsthand. She's an INTP, and let me just be myself enough to be comfortable with who I REALLY was. I am forever in her debt, and she knows it.
Self worth/confidence/respect has been and, will to some extent always be, an issue. As introspective as I am, I grew up not trusting myself or my NFness, and that took a long time to overcome.
I have always found myself drawn to women with ENxP personalities, though, as I said, my best/closest friend is an INTP.
Enough sharing for now, methinks.