To that end, I wouldn't regard you buying earrings for her as fake at all--you thought of her and expressed that in the absolute best way that you knew how. The intent is there; that intent is why you bought her the earrings, and it's also why you wanted to go to the movies with her.
Another "for instance." I'm not one for surprises (I like planning things together) or gifts (I can buy my own stuff) at all--in fact, I'm pretty strongly reactionary to these things, even if I know what the intent is. I'm more of a "let's spend some quality time together" person. I also don't need affirmation, to the point where I'm uncomfortable with it and don't know how to handle it. My girlfriend is the opposite of all of this; she likes gifts, surprises, and affirmation. Even after two years into this and countless conversations about this core subject, it still sometimes takes us a while to get out of our own heads and express ourselves in the way that the other would like to hear it.
Just last week, she had planned a "surprise" trip for me for my birthday, and I didn't want to let her down by telling her outright that I'd rather know what she was planning. Still, she eventually knew to tell me what she had planned, and as a result I was looking forward to it even more than when it was just a nebulous surprise. I had to get across to her that it's not that I don't trust her to pick something that I didn't like and that I didn't appreciate what she was doing--I just like being a part of (or at least clued in on) things that affect me. It definitely worked out, but not without some very clear communication and some feelings hurt all around at first.
For you, it seems like the key is figuring out exactly what she wants. One way to figure that out is this--how does she express her love for you? Do you sometimes 'miss' her expressions of love because you're looking for it in different ways? We tend to express ourselves to others in a way that we would like to hear it--because it's the way that's natural for us.
Yeah, again recommending love languages. It's a great rough-cut guide at all of this.