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  1. #1
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    Default eep...probably posted in the wrong thread at first...

    (I think I put this post in the wrooooong spot. Trying again--Forgive? Yes? Yes?)

    Hello, n00bie here--I've been reading over your forum for a while now, and finally decided to dive in, albeit with Personal Drama. But maybe some fellow NFs can relate?

    I recently went back to school to study culinary arts. I'm usually a very good, easy going student, especially when it comes to theory. But I'm finding it very difficult in this course because of the hands-on in the kitchen and the constant scrutiny. I want to seem competent and capable, but I find my mind turns to mashed potatoes the second I'm near a stove. I measure things wrong, I drop things, and I can *feel* the annoyed, mental sigh of my teachers as I stumble around trying to do things right. I have a whole, unspoken dialogue of several people running around in my head, and while I know it's projecting, I also have a good idea of how people think--And I think my teachers think I'm a moron.

    I'm not usually dumb or scattered. I've written novels, I've been an LTC PSW (nurse's aide) and was able to function very well in high stress situations. I wanted to get out of nursing because emotionally it was becoming too draining. I dealt with people with severe mental disorders daily, and yet now, with 'normal' people, I feel like I'm bombarded with all this energy that I'm having difficulty navigating.

    It doesn't help that one of my teachers plays hot and cold games with me and will be nice to me one minute and then shun me the next. I hate head games, and I'm starting to really resent him for it--as a result I don't do well when he's in the room because the negative feelings I'm getting from him just override my common sense.

    This probably sounds totally crazy. I really need some advice on what to do to calm my inner turmoil and my fear of screwing up so I can actually start relaxing and *enjoying* this course. It doesn't help that most of the people in my class are crazier than the dementia patients I used to take care of. How do I compartmentalize all that input?

    Um....Yeah, I know...Kind of a weirdly intense first post....Awkward, that is my middle name.

  2. #2

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    Hey, I'm not an NF, but I can relate. Despite my outside appearance of being a critical independent thinker who just doesn't give a damn, I actually do give a damn and I can actually be pretty sensitive about failure sometimes.

    Sounds like a classic case of stage fright, which may or may not be able to be "cured" but it can certainly be controlled. Some useful things that might help are to:

    - Concentrate on your talents and how good you are. You're telling us that you're a good student so tell yourself that whenever you get in to class.
    - Imagine you're at home cooking in your own kitchen for just yourself (or a close friend who won't judge you). If you mess up then whatever, you can laugh about it later. If you do amazingly then yeah, go you! But you're still only "cooking for yourself" so it's still "whatever, on to the next culinary adventure". The less importance you put in it, the less anxiety you'll feel about it.
    - Imagine your teachers tasting your dish and rolling around in pure taste bud ecstasy. Imagine them jumping up and yelling "hallelujah!" after tasting your dish. Make it silly and comical. It makes things less serious and makes you realize that their approval is not that necessary.
    - Imagine they're your future customers, not your head-game playing teachers. Eventually those are the people you're going to have to cook for anyway so it doesn't hurt to start thinking about it now.

    And hey, good luck! You sound like a good INFJ friend I have. She's also in the industry and had some similar experiences going through school.

  3. #3
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    Default

    On the other Hand .. I work in a commercial Kitchen and I am a natural.. Cooking doesn't scare me at all.

    But other jobs have. Other courses have.

    I just dropped out of a Pharmacy technician course.. Because I finally decided to listen to what my body was telling me.
    I don't like failing either. But not everyone is meant to do everything.

    It might just mean cooking is not your thing. There is no shame in trying something and finding out, it's not for you after all.

    It's expensive both financially and time invested. Maybe that is what motivates you to continue with something that stresses you out??..
    I stayed in my course for the same reason and had a bit of a breakdown.

    This might not relate to you at all.. But I would still say your body is telling you something.

    Good Luck with this.. I feel your pain and I hope you can find some resolution.

    Edit.. you are also seeing that kitchen work tends to attract very eclectic and strange types of personalities. You almost have be abnormal and deviant in one way or another, and if you aren't .. the job is likely to drive you to some form of self abuse.. drugs , drinking, gambling, sex and personality disorders are common..
    Low paying, high stress work does that to people.

    In MBTI terms .. It requires a good use of Se and Si to function in a kitchen,
    and most importantly, Fe, to function in the whole industry, whether you are front of the house or back.
    You have the Fe.

    My advice is then, work on those sensing functions.

  4. #4
    Senior Member ThatsWhatHeSaid's Avatar
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    Default FOOL!


    FOOL!
    WHO DARES POST AN INTRODUCTORY THREAD IN THE MAIN FORUM?
    THIS TRANSGRESSION WILL NOT BE FORGIVEN.
    YOU SHALL PAY FOR YOUR SINS, N00B!
    YOUR NAME pinkteabag WILL FOREVER BE CURSED!
    TO MISPLACE AN INTRODUCTORY THREAD SHALL HENCEFORTH BE KNOWN AS "to pinkteabag."
    YOU WILL BE REMEMBERED ON THE INTERNET FOREVER!
    THIS THREAD SHALL SERVE AS A REMINDER AND WARNING TO ALL N00B-BL00D.
    IT WILL FOREVER BE KNOWN THAT pinkteabag POSTED IN THE WRONG THREAD!

    NOW BAN HER!

  5. #5
    Senior Member Retmeishka's Avatar
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ThatsWhatHeSaid View Post

    FOOL!
    WHO DARES POST AN INTRODUCTORY THREAD IN THE MAIN FORUM?
    THIS TRANSGRESSION WILL NOT BE FORGIVEN.
    YOU SHALL PAY FOR YOUR SINS, N00B!
    YOUR NAME pinkteabag WILL FOREVER BE CURSED!
    TO MISPLACE AN INTRODUCTORY THREAD SHALL HENCEFORTH BE KNOWN AS "to pinkteabag."
    YOU WILL BE REMEMBERED ON THE INTERNET FOREVER!
    THIS THREAD SHALL SERVE AS A REMINDER AND WARNING TO ALL N00B-BL00D.
    IT WILL FOREVER BE KNOWN THAT pinkteabag POSTED IN THE WRONG THREAD!

    NOW BAN HER!
    lmao - he likes you.

  6. #6
    Minister of Propagandhi ajblaise's Avatar
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    Default

    Just moved this thread to the right forum.

    Welcome, pinkteabag. hmmmm, something about that name..

    Don't mind ThatsWhatHeSaid... I mean, his new username is based of a 4 year old joke... I hope it wasn't his last name change.

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by ThatsWhatHeSaid View Post

    FOOL!
    WHO DARES POST AN INTRODUCTORY THREAD IN THE MAIN FORUM?
    THIS TRANSGRESSION WILL NOT BE FORGIVEN.
    YOU SHALL PAY FOR YOUR SINS, N00B!
    YOUR NAME pinkteabag WILL FOREVER BE CURSED!
    TO MISPLACE AN INTRODUCTORY THREAD SHALL HENCEFORTH BE KNOWN AS "to pinkteabag."
    YOU WILL BE REMEMBERED ON THE INTERNET FOREVER!
    THIS THREAD SHALL SERVE AS A REMINDER AND WARNING TO ALL N00B-BL00D.
    IT WILL FOREVER BE KNOWN THAT pinkteabag POSTED IN THE WRONG THREAD!

    NOW BAN HER!
    Jerk!

  8. #8
    Senior Member ThatsWhatHeSaid's Avatar
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ajblaise View Post
    Don't mind ThatsWhatHeSaid... I mean, his new username is based of a 4 year old joke... I hope it wasn't his last name change.

    FOOLISH MORTAL!
    JOKES ARE LIKE WINES.
    THE GOOD ONES GET BETTER WITH AGE, NOT WORSE!
    YOUR INSOLENT COMMENT IS MEANINGLESS!
    AND, LET ME REMIND YOU,
    MOVING A pinkteabagged THREAD ACCOMPLISHES NOTHING!
    ONCE pinkteabagged, FOREVER pinkteabagged!

    LET THIS BE A LESSON TO ALL OF YOU.
    THOSE WHO ARE teabagged WILL FOREVER BE SHUNNED!
    AND YOU ARE WISE TO SHUN THEM, LEST YOU BE SHUNNED YOURSELF!

  9. #9
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    Default

    @allegorystory Thanks for the encouragement, and I will implement your suggestions. I'm not the only one making mistakes, either, and I am learning (after all, I've never worked in the food industry at all before), so, you know. Mistakes=Learning. I'm just learning a *lot* is all :P.

    I want to say I didn't feel the same way during my PSW course, but I remember now that I did get deer in the headlights syndrome during the practical portion. It did get better, and I ended up being very good at my job. I ended up getting hired from my first practical. The difference was the teacher, an RN who was far more accessible, but then, it was a different kind of work.

    I'd love to know how your friend survived it all. I hope she is doing well!

  10. #10
    Minister of Propagandhi ajblaise's Avatar
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ThatsWhatHeSaid View Post



    FOOLISH MORTAL!
    JOKES ARE LIKE WINES.
    THE GOOD ONES GET BETTER WITH AGE, NOT WORSE!
    YOUR INSOLENT COMMENT IS MEANINGLESS!
    AND, LET ME REMIND YOU,
    MOVING A pinkteabagged THREAD ACCOMPLISHES NOTHING!
    ONCE pinkteabagged, FOREVER pinkteabagged!

    LET THIS BE A LESSON TO ALL OF YOU.
    THOSE WHO ARE teabagged WILL FOREVER BE SHUNNED!
    AND YOU ARE WISE TO SHUN THEM, LEST YOU BE SHUNNED YOURSELF!
    I think you thought using a He instead of a She in your name put enough of a twist on it to get away w/ it. But, not really..

    Hey, why did the chicken cross the road? That joke just gets better. Sometimes people become ironically cool years after their peak, like Mr. T a while ago, and Betty White. But I never heard of it happening w/ jokes.

    Face it, ur pissed you have no name changes left!

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