I think I am a pretty typical ENFJ.
I see how people fit, what motivates them, I like to help others and be a part of a cohesive team, and I am seen as exceptionally warm, calm and confident. I think that these perceptions of me are pretty accurate and are also how I see myself. I can see how other types see this type as manipulative. I cannot deny it - when I sense that a person is acting in a certain way because they are afraid / territorial / feeling a lack of confidence or whatever and I do something to make them feel reassured, that IS manipulation. I try to use my insights for good, but it is pretty arrogant of us to decide what people need and then lead them to it without their consent - and I would have to say, without them even being aware of it.
I am often lonely because I dont often share my true feelings or passions with others as easily as I would like. This is partly because I dont want to hurt or negatively influence others, and partly because I fear my passion will fry other peoples minds. LOL! I am more easily bruised than I wish, and almost unable to forgive and forget.
I am pretty comfy being an ENFJ but I wonder how others use the info provided by this personality profile to work on making changes in their lives. If I could change anything I would be more capable of letting go of resentment and mistrust when others hurt me.
Seems like a great site, glad I found it!