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Thread: Hi.

  1. #11
    Per Ardua Metamorphosis's Avatar
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    I suppose you are INTJ that is a mom and not the mom of an INTJ.

    Welcome
    "You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit."

    Reason is, and ought only to be the slave of the passions, and can never pretend to any other office
    than to serve and obey them. - David Hume

  2. #12
    Senior Member INTJMom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The_Liquid_Laser View Post
    Welcome INTJMom!

    Dare I ask this question? Yes I dare. As an INTJ mom, how elaborate and/or unusual are the punishments that you devise for your children when they misbehave. Can you give an example of one of the more unusual ways you've developed to discipline your children? (You don't have to answer this question if you don't want to. But my imagination is already devising unusual things that would happen in the daily life of an INTJ mom. )
    Thanks for the welcome.

    Well, I am bold enough to answer you.
    I actually like to keep things simple and uncomplicated
    (and apparently I am somewhat different in that respect)
    so my method of discipline is not elaborate - I don't think.

    I had teaching and training in how to properly administer corporal punishment.
    The me before the teaching would have been more like my parents,
    i.e. out of control violent rage-aholics.
    The me after the teaching followed very strict rules and guidelines.
    -Unspoken rules are not punishable.
    -The offense must be gravely serious like lying, stealing, etc.

    So I guess it was a little elaborate in that I had a long list of guidelines I had to follow,
    I did sort of have it "down to a science"
    but the punishment itself was simple.
    A 3 year old gets 3 swats with a small wooden spoon handle on the behind.
    A 4 year old gets 4 swats, etc.
    Then there was the "talk".
    The child would apologize.
    I would forgive them.
    We would hug and make up.
    Everything would be cool again.
    Parents who punish their children by rejecting them are doing great emotional damage.

    My oldest 2 kids could be corrected very easily in a matter of a couple minutes.
    My 3rd born!
    My oldest two complain that I didn't spank the youngest one enough.
    It was a 45 minute job every single time!
    (Hence the reason we didn't do it very much.)
    He's still as strong-willed and stubborn as they come!

    But my kids are good kids, polite, good grades, they like us.
    I think we did ok.

    I did not write out everything. It's a rough overview.
    Why do you ask?

    (Disclaimer: For those of you who don't believe in corporal punishment
    and want to debate with me about it. No thanks.
    You live your life and I'll live mine.
    We'll see whose kids turn out better in the end.)

  3. #13
    Senior Member INTJMom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Metamorphosis View Post
    I suppose you are INTJ that is a mom and not the mom of an INTJ.

    Welcome
    That is correct.
    Mom is my major identity.
    I was having a hard time thinking of a username that described me.

    I have never been good at naming things.

    Thank you for the welcome.

    I do have a daughter who is an ISTJ, with a high N.

  4. #14
    Senior Member miked277's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by INTJMom View Post
    Disclaimer: For those of you who don't believe in corporal punishment
    and want to debate with me about it. No thanks.
    You live your life and I'll live mine.
    We'll see whose kids turn out better in the end.
    i think you have a good system going on there. my parents handled things similarly i believe, but w/o the detailed system. looking back on myself as a kid and some of the stuff i did, i probably would have given myself a whoopin' too heh.

    but yeah, after being punished my mom (esfj) would always make sure we knew she still loved us, etc.

  5. #15
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    Welcome! I can't think of much else to say, but we're glad to have you aboard.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  6. #16
    The Unwieldy Clawed One Falcarius's Avatar
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    Welcome, from the 'real' England.
    Quote Originally Posted by Thalassa View Post
    Oh our 3rd person reference to ourselves denotes nothing more than we realize we are epic characters on the forum.

    Narcissism, plain and simple.

  7. #17
    Glowy Goopy Goodness The_Liquid_Laser's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by INTJMom View Post
    Thanks for the welcome.

    Well, I am bold enough to answer you.
    I actually like to keep things simple and uncomplicated
    (and apparently I am somewhat different in that respect)
    so my method of discipline is not elaborate - I don't think.

    I had teaching and training in how to properly administer corporal punishment.
    The me before the teaching would have been more like my parents,
    i.e. out of control violent rage-aholics.
    The me after the teaching followed very strict rules and guidelines.
    -Unspoken rules are not punishable.
    -The offense must be gravely serious like lying, stealing, etc.

    So I guess it was a little elaborate in that I had a long list of guidelines I had to follow,
    I did sort of have it "down to a science"
    but the punishment itself was simple.
    A 3 year old gets 3 swats with a small wooden spoon handle on the behind.
    A 4 year old gets 4 swats, etc.
    Then there was the "talk".
    The child would apologize.
    I would forgive them.
    We would hug and make up.
    Everything would be cool again.
    Parents who punish their children by rejecting them are doing great emotional damage.

    My oldest 2 kids could be corrected very easily in a matter of a couple minutes.
    My 3rd born!
    My oldest two complain that I didn't spank the youngest one enough.
    It was a 45 minute job every single time!
    (Hence the reason we didn't do it very much.)
    He's still as strong-willed and stubborn as they come!

    But my kids are good kids, polite, good grades, they like us.
    I think we did ok.

    I did not write out everything. It's a rough overview.
    Why do you ask?

    (Disclaimer: For those of you who don't believe in corporal punishment
    and want to debate with me about it. No thanks.
    You live your life and I'll live mine.
    We'll see whose kids turn out better in the end.)
    Thank you for sharing. I am asking because I am mostly interested to see how Ni manifests itself. I think you have taken a more Te oriented approach, which I believe is probably a "safer" approach.

    I find Ni fascinating. My wife is an INFJ, and although we do not have children yet (and she isn't pregant) she already has planned out in her head their entire lives. In fact she is already mad at them for being rebellious when they become teenagers. (You think I am kidding, but I am not.)
    My wife and I made a game to teach kids about nutrition. Please try our game and vote for us to win. (Voting period: July 14 - August 14)
    http://www.revoltingvegetables.com

  8. #18
    Senior Member INTJMom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by miked277 View Post
    i think you have a good system going on there. my parents handled things similarly i believe, but w/o the detailed system. looking back on myself as a kid and some of the stuff i did, i probably would have given myself a whoopin' too heh.

    but yeah, after being punished my mom (esfj) would always make sure we knew she still loved us, etc.
    Thanks for the moral support.

  9. #19
    Senior Member INTJMom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cafe View Post
    Welcome! I can't think of much else to say, but we're glad to have you aboard.
    Thank you kindly.
    See you around!

  10. #20
    Senior Member INTJMom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Falcarius View Post
    Welcome, from the 'real' England.
    You remind me of what I used to say when we lived near the US Naval Academy.
    When I would mention that my husband was in the Navy,
    people would ask, "Oh is he at the Academy?"
    (which basically means a cushy teaching job making big bucks-
    unlike my husband who used to work on a dirty ship for little pay).

    I would say, "No. He's in the REAL Navy."

    It was cute until once I said it to an Officers' wife.
    Boy! Was she offended!

    (I stopped saying it.)

    See you around!

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