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Thread: How Do You Deal with a Narcissist?

  1. #1

    Default How Do You Deal with a Narcissist?

    Some of the most difficult people to deal with are extraordinarily competent but refuse to share power or flex to consider other perspectives. Thus, they become obstructionists in contemporary society; and numerous studies of modern corporations have found “a disproportional number of narcissistic individuals [in] executive leadership positions.”

    Personality Type In Depth Article Here

    Question at the bottom of the article:
    "Have you ever encountered such a person? Have you known people who seem wedded to their persona, or to the dominant function, in an inflated or grandiose way? What is the typological way to deal with the poisonous effects of such typological one-sidedness? How can type help us and how can we help others deal with narcissistic personalities? Do you have any strategies, insights, or type tips to share?"

  2. #2
    eating bugs out of hair. Array prplchknz's Avatar
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    Jun 2007


    ignore them, if they're not gonna change i won't waste my time
    by @magpie

  3. #3


    Get rid of all the mirrors in their house and watch them go insane in 3 minutes flat.

  4. #4


    Quote Originally Posted by LadyLazarus View Post
    Get rid of all the mirrors in their house and watch them go insane in 3 minutes flat.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Array Jaguar's Avatar
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    May 2007


    Tell them they're a fucking idiot.
    If this is the best of possible worlds, what then are the others?
    ― Voltaire, Candide

  6. #6
    climb on Array Showbread's Avatar
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    Oct 2013
    3w2 so/sp


    I just generally tend to ignore the one I live with. Or I make extremely sassy/smart ass remarks that make her seem like a total drama queen, which she is. Those generally just piss her off a lot. She can dish it for days but really can't take it at all. I really should handle it in a more mature way, but passive aggression just comes so naturally. Actually, come to think of it I'm not sure which sets her off more, ignoring her or sassing her. I should experiment.
    “We need to remember what's important in life: friends, waffles, work. Or waffles, friends, work. Doesn't matter, but work is third.” - Leslie Knope

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  7. #7
    Seal Down Array Hard's Avatar
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    Jan 2014
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    Ignore them.

    If you give them attention, of any kind, it's only going to make them worse. Narcissistic people need attention of some sort, and without it they can't function as they want. You're essentially stripping them of their power to be narcissistic.

    Quote Originally Posted by prplchknz View Post
    ignore them, if they're not gonna change i won't waste my time
    Yup this. The only way a narcissist can change is if they actually see themselves as narcissistic, and that's something that no one can show. It's completely on them. It truly is a waste of time and energy to involve onesself with one.
    MBTI: ExxJ tetramer
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    Alignment: Lawful Neutral
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  8. #8


    I ask @Sinmara to do a pardoy of him.

  9. #9
    Just do it Array Zarathustra's Avatar
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    Oct 2009
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    Saw this yesterday as well.

    Considered posting about it, but figured Highlander would.

    I don't know if @Article Poster is an admin, tho, anymore, or someone related to 'Personality Type In Depth'...

    Anyway, having been called a narcissist a number of times, I've actually done a reasonable amount of research into it.

    First off, I'll say, I haven't read the article yet, but it seemed to me to deal with it primarily in a Jungian typological way...

    If that is what it did, then I find that pretty problematic, and I think enneagram is actually more helpful on this.

    Second, the term and concept of narcissism (Freud; healthy vs unhealthy) has an interesting history.

    The book 'The Americanization of Narcissism' was published this year, examining this history.

    Here is an interview with the author that I found extremely illuminating:

    The history is all described there, so I won't go into it in detail.

    In short, she talks about the history of the ideas of healthy narcissism and unhealthy narcissism in America.

    Each idea was promulgated by a prominent psychotherapist of the time, but the latter concept ended up gaining more prominence.

    The publishing of Christopher Lasch's book 'The Culture of Narcissism' in 1979 was the keystone moment in this development.

    I posted these links, which dive deeper into that subject, the other day, in @xisnotx's thread.

    Reading through these, you somewhat get the sense that narcissism has become an almost vapid, catch-all accusation used against anyone who is ambitious and successful. There is such a thing as serious narcissism, NPD-style, and it is usually associated with a lack of empathy, amongst other ills. The requirements to be diagnosed as having NPD apparently increased with the new DSM, as overdiagnosis seemed possible and problematic, considering someone with a healthy sense of narcissism could fall under many of the same criteria, but not actually be pathological. I find this distinction between the two -- what makes one have a healthy sense of narcissism vs what makes one pathologically narcissistic (and thus have NPD) -- an interesting one.
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  10. #10
    Senior Member Array yeghor's Avatar
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    Dec 2013


    There's also the issue of egotism though...

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