[ISTP] When do ISTPs share their deeper emotions?

[Domino]

That mustache is symbolic of which deeper feeling?

 

[MetalWounds]

That mustache is symbolic of which deeper feeling?

I dunno...crud?

 

[Domino]

I dunno...crud?

WRONG! The correct answer is "Canadians". We would have accepted "plasma", "diffidence" and "rama-lama-ding-dong".

Here. Your parting gift of 'stache wax and a book about grooming.

 

[LadyJaye]

Well my killer stache would beg to differ.

Glued on facial hair doesn't count. And I've disqualified all other mustaches of that ilk, real or not, because they make me queasy.

WRONG! The correct answer is "Canadians". We would have accepted "plasma", "diffidence" and "rama-lama-ding-dong".

Here. Your parting gift of 'stache wax and a book about grooming.

I was thinking a well aimed dart shot into his fanny, followed by the liberal application of a shaver to his nasty upper lip.

 

[MetalWounds]

WRONG! The correct answer is "Canadians". We would have accepted "plasma", "diffidence" and "rama-lama-ding-dong".

Here. Your parting gift of 'stache wax and a book about grooming.

Always a bridesmaid, never a bride... meh.

I was thinking a well aimed dart shot into his fanny, followed by the liberal application of a shaver to his nasty upper lip.

You'll never make it past the penflares.

 

[LeonardoLestat]

I'm wondering under what circumstances do ISTPs let a person "in," and share their feelings? Question for the ISTPs and those who have experience with this lovely type

When theyre drunk

 

[StephMC]

When theyre drunk

Hahaha... that's definitely more true rather than not. BUT... when I -do- start drinking truth juice I tend to throw in a lot of sneaky lies to throw people off. But I don't have a problem admitting it later. I really can't help it... so all I can do is laugh about it later (it is kinda funny, no? Okay maybe only an ISTP would find that funny...).

I think as a woman, I feel it's more obligated of me to open up... but it by no means comes naturally. I suppose I'll open up to my ENFP sister a lot... but that's also just because she's my sister, I think. That has not been the case for other ENFP's I've met. I also connected with an ESTJ really quickly once, and found it easier and easier to be more open with him

 

[Domino]

I wish I knew a female ISTP, IRL. I've never met one, to my knowledge. Just guys. Do you think as a female you're expected to act softer or "F" in your day to day relationships?

 

[phoenity]

Hahaha... that's definitely more true rather than not. BUT... when I -do- start drinking truth juice I tend to throw in a lot of sneaky lies to throw people off. But I don't have a problem admitting it later. I really can't help it... so all I can do is laugh about it later (it is kinda funny, no? Okay maybe only an ISTP would find that funny...).

I think as a woman, I feel it's more obligated of me to open up... but it by no means comes naturally. I suppose I'll open up to my ENFP sister a lot... but that's also just because she's my sister, I think. That has not been the case for other ENFP's I've met. I also connected with an ESTJ really quickly once, and found it easier and easier to be more open with him

We ain't got to do nothin but die!


I don't know what it is exactly but I find that certain Fs are very easy to open up to. I'm drawn to people who are in touch with their feelings and share them uninhibitedly. It makes me feel "safe" and less vulnerable to reciprocate. Although I don't like it when people share their feelings then expect me to immediately reciprocate. It takes me awhile to really understand how I actually feel about something or someone. I like it better when you do most of the sharing and allow me to listen and think.

 

[StephMC]

I wish I knew a female ISTP, IRL. I've never met one, to my knowledge. Just guys. Do you think as a female you're expected to act softer or "F" in your day to day relationships?

It used to be really hard for me to think about what the consequences of my actions were on other's feelings. Although I think a lot of SPs can struggle with this, simply because they like to live in the moment and jump into things on a whim, I think this was especially hard for me as an ISTP... My introverted thinking didn't really take the feelings of others into account, and I'd use logic to rationalize why a person shouldn't feel a certain way (I'd even do it to myself!).

But honestly, the older I get, and the more I find a balance among all the different function types, I -have- gotten softer or "F" in my day to day relationships. I think the biggest influence is my VERY Feeler sister (An ENFP), so I can't say this may be true for all ISTP women. She has a knack for figuring out the best way to communicate something to different types of people, and she began to point out the things I did that came off as sensitive and unfeeling. In this way, she slowly taught me how to recognize these things on my own. I don't -want- to hurt people, I'm just sometimes oblivious. And yeah, other times I'm oblivious on purpose just because it's convenient. But after a few hard-learned lessons, I do that less and less.

Another influence was dating an INTP for 3 years.... "Sensitive" is the last thing I'd describe him as. So when -he- was being insensitive, it helped me realize how it felt for people -I- was being insensitive to.

Anyways, it's safe to say that an ISTP -can- become more sensitive. Especially if they have a particularly influential "F" in their life and/or they become close to someone even -more- insensitive. I'm sure that in this particular area, it's very different for ISTP men and women, but I'm still convinced that ISTP men can learn too. We just have to use our power of observation to start recognizing the triggers that make us insensitive from the reactions in other people!

 

[Valhallahereicome]

I'm pretty sure that my ex-boyfriend is an ISTP. When would he open up and share his feelings? Umm, never. Ever.

There were two or three conversations over the course of our relationship where he did share something. It tended to be something that he had felt weeks or months ago, and he hadn't wanted to bring it up until now - perhaps because the feeling was over.

If anything ever bothered him, he absolutely refused to talk about it. If I asked, he would deny being bothered or tell me it had nothing to do with me, even when I was pretty sure it had. Then, he would say something about needing to go check on his boat or take care of some errand and disappear. I wouldn't see him until that night. When he came back, he would act as though nothing had happened.

 

[Domino]

I was digging thru a pile of old passed notes spanning many years. I found several from my ISTP ex-bff. One said "I'm writing to you and you aren't even here. Love you, Shorty...PS Holy **** - a radiator for a semi costs $5K..."

haha!

 

[ThatsWhatHeSaid]

8:35pm

 

[Domino]

8:35pm

*pushes you down in the sandbox* *sits on your chest* *eats your lunch*

 

[Poki]

There were two or three conversations over the course of our relationship where he did share something. It tended to be something that he had felt weeks or months ago, and he hadn't wanted to bring it up until now - perhaps because the feeling was over.

Ti softens Fe emotions because we come to a much better understanding and end up seeing both sides. Its not that the feeling was over, we just finally understood it. ISTPs do everything in the background and when it finally comes out we have a really good understanding of what happened on both sides and can discuss it. Ti forces us to have an understanding of the entire situation. How can you understand something if you can only see one side? Without that understanding things come out that are just pure emotion and at that point you will say extremely hurtful things because you havnt figured out what the real problem was, just the surface problem. When we yell and fight it is focused on the problem at hand, not the root cause, eventually it may get back to the root cause. This is why we need time to calm down when we get mad because at that point you are not focused on the root cause. It takes alot to get me frustrated or angry because I first try to figure out the root cause. The best way to make me mad is to keep yelling at me about the current situation like it is gonna resolve anything. I heard you, either say whats really bothering you or move on. It drives me nuts when people stew over it because everything after that point just builds on each other and you end up getting mad for pointless crap and before you know it the world is about to explode because of something stupid. Sorry, it may be a never ending cycle of sad, I am just used to dealing with other people getting angry at this point. The way I see it is when we are sad we are trying to deal with it, when we get angry we are trying to push it off onto others. I need to understand the real problem and at that point I may become emotional.

Yes there is emotion behind that, but it gets to the root cause.

edit: the above will push me to the point of anger and I will follow the same pattern I described above that I hate so I try to avoid making people angry.

 

[kendoiwan]

I tend to share my deepest emotions through song. (I just noticed today)

 

[Poki]

I tend to share my deepest emotions through song. (I just noticed today)

I do too, my wife hasnt caught on. If she was Ne she would have caught on for sure.

 

[Poki]

[YOUTUBE="L40e__kgJIQ"]Feels so right[/YOUTUBE]

 

[Bamboo]

Reaction to that song: --- ---

kidding.

When I share my emotions

The following is more related to getting advice about emotional issues from someone else than to times I just share my emotions to compliment. Some overlaps.

Conditions usually look like this:
- Emotions I'm feeling right now or I felt in the past are somehow relevant.
- I don't feel like I have to share emotions for someone else. In other words, if I get the feeling someone is dependent on me to "open up" so they can feel like they've done something, I won't.
- I have the impression that the other person WON'T just respond in a way to make me feel good if I need advice. That gets me nowhere. That gets me nowhere. That gets me nowhere. If you're playing at home, where does feel good fluff get me when I need advice?*
- I have an idea of your behavior and know where you're coming from.

Note:
When condition 2 is broken, normally condition 3 is as well. They seem to go hand in hand with certain people.

These conditions don't come together that often, but I normally don't need advice about my emotions all that often either.

*Hint: You won't find it on a map.

 

[Costrin]

Reaction to that song: --- ---

kidding.

When I share my emotions

The following is more related to getting advice about emotional issues from someone else than to times I just share my emotions to compliment. Some overlaps.

Conditions usually look like this:
- Emotions I'm feeling right now or I felt in the past are somehow relevant.
- I don't feel like I have to share emotions for someone else. In other words, if I get the feeling someone is dependent on me to "open up" so they can feel like they've done something, I won't.
- I have the impression that the other person WON'T just respond in a way to make me feel good if I need advice. That gets me nowhere. That gets me nowhere. That gets me nowhere. If you're playing at home, where does feel good fluff get me when I need advice?*
- I have an idea of your behavior and know where you're coming from.

Note:
When condition 2 is broken, normally condition 3 is as well. They seem to go hand in hand with certain people.

These conditions don't come together that often, but I normally don't need advice about my emotions all that often either.

*Hint: You won't find it on a map.

I RELATE N' STUFF.