[ISTP] When do ISTPs share their deeper emotions?

[Intricate Mystic]

I tend to share my deepest emotions through song. (I just noticed today)

I do too, my wife hasnt caught on. If she was Ne she would have caught on for sure.

The songs that express your deepest emotions.... did you identify with them at first by focusing on the lyrics, and then the music? Do the lyrics best express your emotions or is it a combination of words plus the music itself? I'm just wondering because I'm the most in touch with my emotions when I listen to music. However, I am attracted to the mood/feeling and melodies of the actual music first, then I listen more closely to the lyrics. It's the mood of the song and melodies that help me get in touch with my feelings. The song lyrics aren't as important to me. I wonder if it is a reverse process for ISTP's?!

 

[Poki]

The songs that express your deepest emotions.... did you identify with them at first by focusing on the lyrics, and then the music? Do the lyrics best express your emotions or is it a combination of words plus the music itself? I'm just wondering because I'm the most in touch with my emotions when I listen to music. However, I am attracted to the mood/feeling and melodies of the actual music first, then I listen more closely to the lyrics. It's the mood of the song and melodies that help me get in touch with my feelings. The song lyrics aren't as important to me. I wonder if it is a reverse process for ISTP's?!

I like the music, but its the words, but the mood does help.

 

[Azseroffs]

shit.. I don't think my istp friend knows the meaning of the word deep.. He was my best friend for 3 years and I never once had a deep convo with him. Strange considering I talk deep to everyone I know at any opportunity I get. A sad waste of Ti imo

 

[something boring]

Mine has his own form of depth, it's essentially whatever he doesn't like to show to just anyone (this could be anything, like mild annoyance toward a coworker). He is very open with me, to the point that I sometimes question his "I" (there are a few other reasons, too, but that's a whole other post). Basically, he vents about anything that he finds stressful at all throughout his day.
However, he also lets me in on what really makes him tick (deeper things, like why he does what he does), and I try to help him to become more aware of what exactly that is, since I know it isn't really natural for him.
Of course, this is just my experience, and with one person at that.

The other one I know takes more of a secret sharing sort of approach with me, but I suppose a lot of people initiate conversation with me this way.

 

[janey_girl]

Interesting thread and a lot of it makes sense with my ISTP boyfriend... He will be discussing how he feels, but it can change almost instantaneously - almost as though he's in a state of emotional flux... When I'm feeling "complicated" and need understanding he can't quite come to terms with why I find the need to "share" and tells me to "pull my head out of my arse" - has the right effect BUT not really the way to discuss with an INFJ. Yesterday he was having a "diva" moment by text so I gave him a taste of his medicine by telling him to pull his head out his arse and it worked, he was fine...

He likes to "see" my emotions - to visualise anger and the such, to discuss is not right to him - he needs to see the emotion in action - if that makes sense... For him it won't be a discussion either - more a display of emotion... You ISTPs are crazy folk!

 

[Poki]

This sounds like Fi. Fi is about me, Fe is about others. What you describe is very what about me(Fi). Fi is about trying to figure out how you feel. Fe is about how others feel. Being an ISTP I will take everything on so others will be happy, I dont care how I feel until I get pushed to far. Now bring someone else into the picture that I care about and I am stuck in a tug-of-war. I am forced to hurt one protecting the other. This is Fe tug-of-war at its finest in regards to people we love and care about.

edit: When it is someone we love we can be pushed to serious medical problems because we ignore ourselves and only care about others. Welcome to what I come to think of as the introverted Fe heart attack.

 

[phoenity]

Interesting thread and a lot of it makes sense with my ISTP boyfriend... He will be discussing how he feels, but it can change almost instantaneously - almost as though he's in a state of emotional flux... When I'm feeling "complicated" and need understanding he can't quite come to terms with why I find the need to "share" and tells me to "pull my head out of my arse" - has the right effect BUT not really the way to discuss with an INFJ. Yesterday he was having a "diva" moment by text so I gave him a taste of his medicine by telling him to pull his head out his arse and it worked, he was fine...

He likes to "see" my emotions - to visualise anger and the such, to discuss is not right to him - he needs to see the emotion in action - if that makes sense... For him it won't be a discussion either - more a display of emotion... You ISTPs are crazy folk!

Most of my feelings are fleeting. If I am to discuss my feelings, it requires me to pull them out of a depth and examine them to understand what I'm feeling. Once I do that and try make substance out of them, rather than them just existing in the background, they seem irrational and silly, like they don't really matter, and go back to thinking about important things. That's what "pull your head out of your arse" means

I rarely feel "complicated" about my feelings, but I do realize and appreciate that there are other people who need to put more time and energy into examining their feelings before they pass, so I am accommodating if you feel the need to share with me to get them off your mind. In fact, I cherish moments like those because it really means the other person trusts you.

To me, most of my feelings are like the clouds floating in the sky. If I don't pay any attention to them, they pass and I usually don't even realize they were there in the first place. If I look up into the sky and and see all these differently-shaped clouds, I might pull one down to give it a closer look. But no sooner than I have it in my hands trying to see what substance is there, it starts to fall apart on me and float away out of my hands before I can make sense of it to see if it really means anything. Then it's gone. I figure if it disappeared so quickly it must not have been very important.

Most days my skies are mostly sunny, maybe partly cloudy. But some days the clouds span the entire sky, creating a darkness on my world down below. I've learned that those are the only clouds worth trying to examine, I think maybe I can figure out what is causing the storm and make it go away.

 

[janey_girl]

Most days my skies are mostly sunny, maybe partly cloudy. But some days the clouds span the entire sky, creating a darkness on my world down below. I've learned that those are the only clouds worth trying to examine, I think maybe I can figure out what is causing the storm and make it go away.

That's really lovely and it helps me understand "his world" a little more... When I go all sensitive on him, he cannot handle it at all.... Practical stuff or words he has no problems with....

 

[phoenity]

Most days my skies are mostly sunny, maybe partly cloudy. But some days the clouds span the entire sky, creating a darkness on my world down below. I've learned that those are the only clouds worth trying to examine, I think maybe I can figure out what is causing the storm and make it go away.

That's really lovely and it helps me understand "his world" a little more... When I go all sensitive on him, he cannot handle it at all.... Practical stuff or words he has no problems with....

6. Introverted ethics

SLIs very much enjoy personal conversations where people talk about their feelings and personal experience in an atmosphere of trust and intimacy. However, they tend to willingly follow others' initiative or create external conditions where emotional intimacy is likely to occur rather than actually initiating the intimacy themselves. SLIs are easy people to talk to about one's personal sentiments about life, people, and relationships, since they listen closely and with genuine interest as long as the person they are hearing out is not worked up or agitated.

SLIs appreciate such qualities as concern, tact, and openness about one's feelings. These are the kinds of people they are drawn to for friendship. They are usually very polite and loyal; particularly to close family members and the very few people they count as friends. They expect the same returned, but often suffer quiet disappointment.

 

[Poki]

Are we in disagreement here, or just on different subjects?

The original question was when do we share our deeper feelings, which of course has to come from Fi.

Are you ISTJ on socionics? Confused and questioning things.

 

[phoenity]

Are you ISTJ on socionics? Confused and questioning things.

I've read that MBTI ISTP translates with Socionics ISTX. I've read both descriptions and find that I don't identify with Socionics ISTJ at all, so I'm pretty sure I'm ISTP in both. Then again it could be me who is confused.

Logical sensing introvert - Wikisocion

Sensing logical introvert - Wikisocion

 

[Poki]

I see so many differences in me and you and I am trying to figure it out. Look at responses that we both make to happy puppy. You give detail about what to do, I explain what I see. This is a disconnect between apparent behaviour and actual cause and effect in regards to our functions. I am still trying to figure this out and you sparked my interest because we are the same outside yet different inside and different in how we deal with people.

edit: this may need a seperate thread because it wil derail this thread big time.

 

[janey_girl]

6. Introverted ethics

SLIs very much enjoy personal conversations where people talk about their feelings and personal experience in an atmosphere of trust and intimacy. However, they tend to willingly follow others' initiative or create external conditions where emotional intimacy is likely to occur rather than actually initiating the intimacy themselves. SLIs are easy people to talk to about one's personal sentiments about life, people, and relationships, since they listen closely and with genuine interest as long as the person they are hearing out is not worked up or agitated.

SLIs appreciate such qualities as concern, tact, and openness about one's feelings. These are the kinds of people they are drawn to for friendship. They are usually very polite and loyal; particularly to close family members and the very few people they count as friends. They expect the same returned, but often suffer quiet disappointment.

I do think sometimes it's the introverted side that keeps us in key... We're talking very different languages on very different levels - but it works for both of us in a weird way - It's like hydrogen and oxygen - separate - highly flamable - together though they become water.... It just makes sense....

 

[phoenity]

I see so many differences in me and you and I am trying to figure it out. Look at responses that we both make to happy puppy. You give detail about what to do, I explain what I see. This is a disconnect between apparent behaviour and actual cause and effect in regards to our functions. I am still trying to figure this out and you sparked my interest because we are the same outside yet different inside and different in how we deal with people.

edit: this may need a seperate thread because it wil derail this thread big time.

That's strange because I see many similarities between us. Some of your responses seem like you took the words right out of my mouth. Then other times when our opinions are substantially different, it mostly seems like we're simply looking at the situation from a different perspective.

Though I am open and quite curious in figuring out why we look at some things from a different perspective. If you have an idea of how to go about that feel free

 

[Poki]

That's strange because I see many similarities between us. Some of your responses seem like you took the words right out of my mouth. Then other times when our opinions are substantially different, it mostly seems like we're simply looking at the situation from a different perspective.

Though I am open and quite curious in figuring out why we look at some things from a different perspective. If you have an idea of how to go about that feel free

You hit it on the head. Perception is the key and is what Ne/Ni/Se/Si is all about. You seem like a very healthy ISTJ, or you seem like you match SiTeFiNe functions. Te is talking through things with others to figure stuff out. Se is noticing differences, while Ne is noticing similarities. My Se drives me to Ti and drives me to question the similarities that I see.

 

[Intricate Mystic]

shit.. I don't think my istp friend knows the meaning of the word deep.. He was my best friend for 3 years and I never once had a deep convo with him. Strange considering I talk deep to everyone I know at any opportunity I get. A sad waste of Ti imo

When I first met the ISTP I know, he seemed intelligent but wasn't all that talkative. Later, when I started e-mailing him with questions about the class I took from him, he would sometimes give me long answers to my questions that were extremely intelligent. When he interacts with people in person, you see mostly his Se- he's constantly observing what people are doing, and not saying that much. When he writes, though, he's using Ti, so he displays more depth. It's a shame that most people don't get to see that.

This was an art class that was taught with some lecture but mostly by demonstration.

 

[WALMART]

My emotions are metabolized incredibly easy. Anger is my one unconquerable emotion, and I'm pretty sure that's easy enough to see when expressed.


Talking about emotions is like analyzing poetry, and then writing an essay about it. I'd prefer to either punch someone in the face, cry, or sex it up all night.

 

[Randomnity]

Most of my feelings are fleeting. If I am to discuss my feelings, it requires me to pull them out of a depth and examine them to understand what I'm feeling. Once I do that and try make substance out of them, rather than them just existing in the background, they seem irrational and silly, like they don't really matter, and go back to thinking about important things. That's what "pull your head out of your arse" means

I rarely feel "complicated" about my feelings, but I do realize and appreciate that there are other people who need to put more time and energy into examining their feelings before they pass, so I am accommodating if you feel the need to share with me to get them off your mind. In fact, I cherish moments like those because it really means the other person trusts you.

To me, most of my feelings are like the clouds floating in the sky. If I don't pay any attention to them, they pass and I usually don't even realize they were there in the first place. If I look up into the sky and and see all these differently-shaped clouds, I might pull one down to give it a closer look. But no sooner than I have it in my hands trying to see what substance is there, it starts to fall apart on me and float away out of my hands before I can make sense of it to see if it really means anything. Then it's gone. I figure if it disappeared so quickly it must not have been very important.

Most days my skies are mostly sunny, maybe partly cloudy. But some days the clouds span the entire sky, creating a darkness on my world down below. I've learned that those are the only clouds worth trying to examine, I think maybe I can figure out what is causing the storm and make it go away.

This is such a great description. It's too bad you're long gone, [MENTION=2866]phoenity[/MENTION].