User Tag List

First 12

Results 11 to 14 of 14

  1. #11
    Senior Member countrygirl's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    ISFx
    Enneagram
    4w5
    Posts
    723

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Fuzzy Conduit View Post
    I forgot I started this thread.

    I'd have to say that the biggest problem in my marriage has been that my wife and I enable one another to be irresponsible. For instance, if either is stressed about money, the other one will say 'fuck it, let's go out to eat tonight or take a spontaneous trip to the beach.' Neither of us really enjoys or are good at planning--we can do it, we just have to force ourselves to do it, and more often it's easier to simply let things take their course and wait to jump into action when the shit hits the fan.
    I'll agree with this as my husband is an ISTP. However, I am more of a planner (but not a great one) and freak out when things don't go as planned and my husband is great at putting out fires, and making my messed up plans work.

    I do find that we come to the same conclusion but by different ways of thinking. And different ways of thinking usually causes arguments which we figure out quickly and laugh the disagreements off.

    And ya, the sex is great.

    As to answer your original question, it has been a good match for us. I think the best aspect for me is that he understands my need for space and alone time and not offended by it.

    Oh and we don't mind the silence between us.
    4w5

  2. #12

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by countrygirl View Post
    I'll agree with this as my husband is an ISTP. However, I am more of a planner (but not a great one) and freak out when things don't go as planned and my husband is great at putting out fires, and making my messed up plans work.

    I do find that we come to the same conclusion but by different ways of thinking. And different ways of thinking usually causes arguments which we figure out quickly and laugh the disagreements off.
    I'm not sure who the better planner is in our marriage. I guess it depends on the situation and circumstances. She usually manages our money, reads our bank statements and pays our bills, which is perfectly fine with me. I tend to be more interested in planning stuff like, for example, what to pack for camping trips, or which route to take on car trips.

    And ya, the sex is great.
    Indeed. We don't get to do it as often as we used to (used to be at least three times a week) now that we are both busy and have a kid, but when it happens, it's the best.

    As to answer your original question, it has been a good match for us. I think the best aspect for me is that he understands my need for space and alone time and not offended by it.
    I've heard a lot of women bitch about needy men who don't give them space. That's usually a problem people associate with women, but there seem to be just as many clingy, needy men in the world...I think a lot of it must stem from insecurity. my wife has told me she appreciates I give her a lot of space. I get the impression her ex boyfriends were a bunch of clingy little bitches.

    Oh and we don't mind the silence between us.
    Yes. It's refreshing to be married to someone who is cool doing different things or not speaking while hanging out in the same room. Every girlfriend I had before demanded my constant attention and took my silence to mean something was wrong. My wife will often work on arts and crafts while I will be working on one of my own projects, surfing wikipedia, or playing videogames. It's awesome
    Masculine presenting transgender lesbian

  3. #13
    Senior Member countrygirl's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    ISFx
    Enneagram
    4w5
    Posts
    723

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Fuzzy Conduit View Post
    I'm not sure who the better planner is in our marriage. I guess it depends on the situation and circumstances. She usually manages our money, reads our bank statements and pays our bills, which is perfectly fine with me. I tend to be more interested in planning stuff like, for example, what to pack for camping trips, or which route to take on car trips.
    I also manage the bills and cash flow. And the budget which my husband doesn't mind. I always keep him in the loop about these things as well. He prefers to have actual facts/numbers where as I have been doing this for years and know on a hunch whether there is enough cash. All I ask of him is to let me know if he withdrawal. Note, that does not mean he needs my permission to withdrawal.


    Indeed. We don't get to do it as often as we used to (used to be at least three times a week) now that we are both busy and have a kid, but when it happens, it's the best.
    LOL. I can relate. If you have more kids, there will be even less time. I have three.



    I've heard a lot of women bitch about needy men who don't give them space. That's usually a problem people associate with women, but there seem to be just as many clingy, needy men in the world...I think a lot of it must stem from insecurity. my wife has told me she appreciates I give her a lot of space. I get the impression her ex boyfriends were a bunch of clingy little bitches.
    I cannot tolerate needy or men who need their ego stroked. I think it is compounded by the fact that I am very independent.

    Yes. It's refreshing to be married to someone who is cool doing different things or not speaking while hanging out in the same room. Every girlfriend I had before demanded my constant attention and took my silence to mean something was wrong. My wife will often work on arts and crafts while I will be working on one of my own projects, surfing wikipedia, or playing videogames. It's awesome
    4w5

  4. #14

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by countrygirl View Post
    I also manage the bills and cash flow. And the budget which my husband doesn't mind. I always keep him in the loop about these things as well. He prefers to have actual facts/numbers where as I have been doing this for years and know on a hunch whether there is enough cash. All I ask of him is to let me know if he withdrawal. Note, that does not mean he needs my permission to withdrawal.
    That's more or less how it works in our home.
    Masculine presenting transgender lesbian

Similar Threads

  1. [MBTItm] ISTP/INFP Relationship
    By songofcalamity in forum The SP Arthouse (ESFP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)
    Replies: 146
    Last Post: 07-07-2017, 07:08 PM
  2. [ISTP] ISTP Non-relationship advice ;)
    By brickwall in forum The SP Arthouse (ESFP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 12-10-2015, 08:56 AM
  3. [MBTItm] ISTP & ISFP relationships
    By Wiley45 in forum The SP Arthouse (ESFP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 01-19-2010, 08:37 AM
  4. [ISTP] ISTPs maintaining relationships
    By Intricate Mystic in forum The SP Arthouse (ESFP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)
    Replies: 24
    Last Post: 11-10-2009, 07:11 PM
  5. [ISTP] ISTPs need relationships too!
    By Winz in forum The SP Arthouse (ESFP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)
    Replies: 181
    Last Post: 04-13-2009, 01:01 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO