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  1. #21
    veteran attention whore Jeffster's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post
    This is good.

    So let's say you have an ISFP that in their writing of emails, continually mentions that what they are writing is boring. Why would they do that or think that?

    As far as not impacting anyone is concerned - that's really interesting. Can you elaborate on this?
    If I give someone a CD I made, and the reaction is kinda "gee thanks" and then it gets tossed onto a pile of other CDs and not listened to, then that makes me feel bad, because the impact I wanted to have didn't happen. I could come up with many other examples, but it's basically like, I create things because I enjoy doing so, but appreciation by others is a tremendous bonus.

    My number one thrill is sharing something awesome with somebody, even if I didn't create it, such as a song I think is really cool. If I share it, and get a lukewarm response, or a negative response, it's very deflating, and many times of this occurring causes me to hesitate to share anything with people, so that the negative experience doesn't repeat itself.

    Boring is a tremendous insult to all SPs I think. Boredom is the low point, so if I say everything I'm writing is boring, then likely I am not feeling inspired and the writing is feeling like going through the motions with no reward.
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  2. #22
    Senior Member countrygirl's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jeffster View Post
    If I give someone a CD I made, and the reaction is kinda "gee thanks" and then it gets tossed onto a pile of other CDs and not listened to, then that makes me feel bad, because the impact I wanted to have didn't happen. I could come up with many other examples, but it's basically like, I create things because I enjoy doing so, but appreciation by others is a tremendous bonus.

    My number one thrill is sharing something awesome with somebody, even if I didn't create it, such as a song I think is really cool. If I share it, and get a lukewarm response, or a negative response, it's very deflating, and many times of this occurring causes me to hesitate to share anything with people, so that the negative experience doesn't repeat itself.

    Boring is a tremendous insult to all SPs I think. Boredom is the low point, so if I say everything I'm writing is boring, then likely I am not feeling inspired and the writing is feeling like going through the motions with no reward.
    This sound accurate.

    When I share something with someone, I am also opening up myself to that person and feel vunerable. So when my sharings are not appreciated or I don't feel/see that it is appreciated, then it can feel like the other person is rejecting me.
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  3. #23
    As Long As It Takes.... Redbone's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jeffster View Post
    My number one thrill is sharing something awesome with somebody, even if I didn't create it, such as a song I think is really cool. If I share it, and get a lukewarm response, or a negative response, it's very deflating, and many times of this occurring causes me to hesitate to share anything with people, so that the negative experience doesn't repeat itself.
    This is really interesting. My 19-year-old son is an ISFP and he is constantly sharing his "finds" with me. It seems like he gets a charge when I am pleased with it. If it's music, he's thrilled when he discovers it later on my playlist (we spend a lot of time listening to music in my house). He is also quite a wit and is displeased if it doesn't have the desired effect on me. His displeasure is a subtle thing, though.

    My question for ISFPs, what kind of difficulties have you encountered in your relationships?

  4. #24

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    Quote Originally Posted by Redbone View Post
    This is really interesting. My 19-year-old son is an ISFP and he is constantly sharing his "finds" with me. It seems like he gets a charge when I am pleased with it. If it's music, he's thrilled when he discovers it later on my playlist (we spend a lot of time listening to music in my house). He is also quite a wit and is displeased if it doesn't have the desired effect on me. His displeasure is a subtle thing, though.

    My question for ISFPs, what kind of difficulties have you encountered in your relationships?
    I have, in the past, tried to see where the relationship might go and who I might become with the person I was with. I would kind of Fi-Ni loop during that and talk myself out of wanting to be with someone without them doing anything. I am just now trying to learn to see people for what they are and trying not to see into the future. If I can teach myself to live in this moment most of the time then I think I can be in a stable relationship.
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  5. #25
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    What do you suggest for approaching an isfp who, without any actual reason, does do an fi/ni and perceive something bad coming out of the relationship (despite all evidence showing how good it is currently)? How do you approach this isfp? Any way to suggest contrary or reopen them to the possibility of the relationship again? Would pretending like everything is fine and trying to get the isfp back into the moment be a good plan? Thanls!

  6. #26
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmotini View Post
    Yes I agree.

    I also think the only cure for it is Ni development. That way one can learn to see things from a distanced, shifting perspective, and realize that everything isn't an affront to one's own values or ego.

    On the other hand, SFPs may very much internalize not only their values, but their experiences as personal, making their personal attachment to their beliefs that much more personal. Like if my Fi values are based on what I've seen and experienced in real life, it's all going to seem a lot more dire and serious to me than someone who is just arm-chair philosophizing in a cozy manner. People may be like, "calm down why is this so serious to you" to which my response is "because it affects real people, not just *ideals* of people."

    I really think Ni development is key. But healthy Ni development. Fi/Ni loops just lead to further paranoia that everybody hates you, and may be out to undermine your values/vision.
    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post
    I wonder what the difference is between an Ni/Fi loop and an Fi/Ni loop. They seem like they would be very similar.
    yeah, Marm, you and @BlackCat are looking more like INTJ's every day to me. I think it's interesting as we get older as a type c group how we're developing.... @gromit is starting to look more serious too, but it could just be my perception...
    06/13 10:51:03 five sounds: you!!!
    06/13 10:51:08 shortnsweet: no you!!
    06/13 10:51:12 shortnsweet: go do your things and my things too!
    06/13 10:51:23 five sounds: oh hell naw
    06/13 10:51:55 shortnsweet: !!!!
    06/13 10:51:57 shortnsweet: (cries)
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  7. #27
    likes this gromit's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by shortnsweet View Post
    yeah, Marm, you and @BlackCat are looking more like INTJ's every day to me. I think it's interesting as we get older as a type c group how we're developing.... @gromit is starting to look more serious too, but it could just be my perception...
    I am so serious. Do not even try to mess with me.
    Your kisses, sweeter than honey. But guess what, so is my money.

  8. #28
    Senior Member KDude's Avatar
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    Cheer up.

  9. #29

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    Quote Originally Posted by shortnsweet View Post
    yeah, Marm, you and @BlackCat are looking more like INTJ's every day to me. I think it's interesting as we get older as a type c group how we're developing.... @gromit is starting to look more serious too, but it could just be my perception...
    Am I also not becoming more serious?

  10. #30
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfy View Post
    Am I also not becoming more serious?
    You seem about the same. Maybe it's because you were older to begin with/serious/ already developed.
    06/13 10:51:03 five sounds: you!!!
    06/13 10:51:08 shortnsweet: no you!!
    06/13 10:51:12 shortnsweet: go do your things and my things too!
    06/13 10:51:23 five sounds: oh hell naw
    06/13 10:51:55 shortnsweet: !!!!
    06/13 10:51:57 shortnsweet: (cries)
    06/13 10:52:19 RiftsWRX: You two are like furbies stuck in a shoe box

    My Nohari
    My Johari
    by sns.

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