It's okay getting back in touch with my family, a lot of me is doing it as an experiment. I don't actually have much faith in very many people, especially people in my family. I get much more nourishment out of being alone and doing my own thing or talking to one of my few close friends.
My thinking also opposed that. A few months into things when shit was starting to get bad, had I asked myself if I could see myself growing old with her I would have said "hell no" pretty much immediately. But I didn't see that coming, and I held on hoping maybe it would return to how it was initially (how it SHOULD have been all along in my mind). Had I looked at her experiences and her past, I would have known much better, but I was too present focused to really see past infatuation. And I always will ask myself "will I get tired of this? Would I want to grow old with this?" or in the case of friends "can I see myself wanting to hang out with them over doing something else by myself?" (which the answer is usually no lol, to either one of the quotes).