He doesn't know what you're talking about because to him he wasn't acting any different from his normal self....only to completely not know what you're talking about if you mention that you're worried ISTP is ''not feeling it anymore" just because of that one 'off' day? It's like he forgets that he was totally cold and distant the next morning and is back to his cheerful, "I want you around me" self.
ISTP's can appear very quixotic to others but it's just us responding to our thoughts and desires at that moment - it's nothing personal. We are rather temperamental this way. Think of us as a Sine wave and not a flatline and you'll be fine.
Oh. When he acts "cold and distant" take that time to do your own thing. He may need some time to himself to recharge.
You're awfully hard on yourself. I would talk to him about your perception of this issue. Also, maybe he is "bummed out" because socializing took a toll on him and it isn't you at all? Just throwing things out there.As an INFP who just wants her ISTP to be happy (all the time if it's in her power), I'd like to know why this is. We have only one persistent issue, and it's that I'm not outgoing enough in public (I have a bit of social phobia). This is something he has not explicitly complained about, but I know he'd be delighted if I was more talkative. Because after we get out of a social situation, he acts like he's bummed to be around me, because I wasn't the life of the party. Then as soon as we get home, he's his happy affectionate self again.
I don't know about this. I can't speak for your SO but when I like someone I don't care if anyone else likes that person or not. I will hear my friend's opinion out and I've had instances where my friends approved and disapproved of various people's I've brought around and I'll listen to what they say but it's really none of their business. They don't have to deal with them - I do.In private, he's fine with this -- we get along really well and communicate fine. But when we go out with his friends (there is one immature - subtly competitive, manipulative, and one-upping - female friend in particular who keeps rubbing me the wrong way -- I don't trust her and she has most of the symptoms of NPD) I get a bit nervous and quiet. I'm participating with a pleasant social face on but I think he's disappointed that I'm not coming off as super interesting. Which I feel really bad about. The fact is, he knows I am an interesting and intelligent person inside (which comes out in private), but he wants to have others know it too. And I could care less about flaunting myself, showing off and being pretentious the way his NPD friend does.
Why is he like this? He's 26 btw, I am 29.
I notice you're hanging around his friends. Maybe bring a friend of yours along next time? This might help both of you out.