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  1. #1
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    Default Pessimistic ESFP???

    I have a friend who is an ESFP. Very Fi and Se. Little to no trace of Fe and Si. The thing is, she's a major worry wort. Everything little thing makes her panic and launch into histronics. She can be really fun and light-hearted too once you redirect her focus, but her mind constantly goes back to the negative. I have never known ESFPs to be this way though. I thought they were supposed to be laid-back and carefree-ish. Is she just unhealthy?

    I have tried everything I can to help her be more positive and relaxed but that usually only lasts for a few minutes. Any advice?

  2. #2
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    edit - crap sorry!! i just noticed this was in the arthouse, not the general area! apologies for usurping thread. :blushing:

    unhealthy enneagram 6w7?

    an ESFP friend of mine gets really worked up sometimes - she's a little panicky, especially in regards to relationships - but she's pretty chill overall.

    anyway. do you have any idea if she has an anxiety disorder? that might be part of the problem. it doesn't sound like she's particularly healthy. do you know if she's been like this for a long time? if there's something that's bothering her recently?

  3. #3
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    Thanks, skylights. I have thought before that she might suffer from panic attacks. Maybe it's anxiety disorder like you said. I don't know much about that disorder, I'll have to read up on it. I've known her for 7 years and she's always been this way without breaks.

  4. #4
    Whisky Old & Women Young Speed Gavroche's Avatar
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    I don't see why some types would be less pessimistic than others.
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    PEST that STEPs on PETS stellar renegade's Avatar
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    Why do you think she's ESFP then? Why couldn't she be ESFJ?
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  6. #6
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Speed Gavroche View Post
    I don't see why some types would be less pessimistic than others.
    I guess you're right. I know ESFPs get down sometimes, but I never knew them to have difficulty getting out of a funk.

    Quote Originally Posted by stellar renegade View Post
    Why do you think she's ESFP then? Why couldn't she be ESFJ?
    I thought about that ...but she has so much Fi and Se, and I hardly ever see Fe and Si. And when I think about J traits and P traits, she has more P traits. She took the official MBTI test once, and I was eager to see her results, but she never followed through to get the results.

  7. #7
    veteran attention whore Jeffster's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggly View Post
    I thought about that ...but she has so much Fi and Se, and I hardly ever see Fe and Si. And when I think about J traits and P traits, she has more P traits. She took the official MBTI test once, and I was eager to see her results, but she never followed through to get the results.
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  8. #8
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    In my friend, she has tons and tons of feelings, and they all seem derived internally, and she doesn't pay much attention to what's going with others Feelings, or think about how her feelings compare to others or effect others. She seems Se because she very much so lives in the moment. She doesn't think of past or future. She seems most attracted to things she can experience with her 5 senses, and anything ethereal or imaginative completely escapes her.

    This is just my description of how I see my friend use Fi and Se. I don't see all Fi-Se users in this way. There is a scale or range to its use and depends on the user, and there are other parts to Fi and Se that i haven't described here, as well. I'm certainly not an expert on it.

  9. #9
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    I can tell you exactly why this would happen, as I see it in myself. (Especially when I was younger and less able to deal with things.)

    Being stuck in the moment has it's major flaws. First of all, in moments that are not the most thrilling and happy, the moment is all that you really have. And sometimes it really, really feels like nothing will ever be. Except for this moment. Sometimes the thought of the future is extremely stressful as well. Lacking insight into what may happen next can cause some major panic stricken moments. The "what nexts?" Are really like
    " WHATS NEXT!!!??" Like every second of every day can turn into this big roller coaster ride. There have been times when i've thought about myself as one who always lives in the third act. I really hate drama. But sometimes drama happens when you are literally taking life second by second with little planning.

    One of the descriptions of ESFP said that if we give any thought into anything outside of what's going on it can send us wallowing in despair. I have an anxiety disorder myself caused by all these dynamics. Se-Fi is an anxiety disorder. Once I got older and things started to develop, things were fine. Whew. Now I can think an entire week in advance if I have to! She's probably just a negative, underdeveloped ESFP.
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  10. #10
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    OMG that's it! sounds just like my friend. Thanks, shortnsweet.

    Can I help her in any way?

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