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  1. #1
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    Lightbulb ISTP IN TROUBLE WITH AN ENFJ FEMALE.

    Ok I have some issues dealing with an ENFJ women who is younger then me by 5 years and works at a pool hall I frequent. Let's start from the beginning I kinda liked this ENFJ women and I expressed my self through a text because we all know a very strong ISTP does not share feelings well (well I know I don't that well). Well I was rejected instantly. I told myself that that was okay. So I have been going there for about four months after that and I also play on a team there. Ever so slowly her affections have grown a little each time I see her. Well at first it started out as hey how ya doing, then to give me a hug. Then from give me a hug to give me a kiss on the cheek (or what she likes to say give me some love). Then just lately its been kisses on the forehead, cheek, and a slap on the ass. Then just a few days ago she was walking away as I was leaving and she said it pretty loud I love you and I said me too. She did not like that at all. She wanted me to say it back and I just couldn't. So I don't know what's next or how to deal with a person that is so expressive when I'm not.

  2. #2
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    Learn how to be expressive

  3. #3
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    hmm lesbo love?

  4. #4

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    She can't expect you to say I love you after such a short time. That would be a lie and you should be proud that you aren't a liar.

    It doesn't usually end well when an istp and enfj get together so my advice would be to let it go. If you think she's demanding now, you have to ask yourself what things will be like when she claims ownership of you.

  5. #5
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    Just explain that you're an ISTP and you don't say things like that easily or lightly.

    Show her MBTI.

    She will cry a lot less, and there will be a lot less drama for you to deal with.

  6. #6
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    Well I have a new nick name and my friends have come up with Honest Abe. I have never lied to her nor will I. I will lay it on the table next time I see her. @tayto I have herd a lot of people say let it go but I cant it's like I can't help it. I cant seem to pull myself away. Once she takes hold she doesn't let it go. I tried not talking to her when I go there but she finds me anyway and starts talking about anything . @jixmixfix really does it matter if it was straight or "lesbo".

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by babbygirlk View Post
    @jixmixfix really does it matter if it was straight or "lesbo".
    haha, no I was just being a curious perv. :P

  8. #8
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    @jixmixfix Well it's complicated but you could say something like that. So what would you do in my shoes?

  9. #9
    Widdles in your cream.
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    How are you sure her expressions are genuine, or if she is merely doing it for the ego boost?

    I don't mean to be a Debbie Downer, it just seems odd for someone's words to contradict their actions, especially with the initial rejection. Perhaps to clarify this, you could try texting her again?
    Um, yeah.

  10. #10
    likes this gromit's Avatar
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    My ENFJ friend is very overtly flirty with a lot of people. Very warm, and demands physical and verbal affection but in a coy way, so it sort of comes off as cute, but it's also still sort of a demand. She actually uses that same phrase "give me some love" and points at her cheek. She says it to men and women both.

    Quote Originally Posted by babbygirlk View Post
    I have never lied to her nor will I.
    I think this is honorable. Wish I had some better advice or anything.
    Your kisses, sweeter than honey. But guess what, so is my money.

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