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  1. #1
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    Default ISFP's do you think this way? please!?

    This is something I read on this site a discussion based on emotional abuse
    and how NF's tend to stick around to understand why

    I wan't to know if ISFP's think the same way (not saying ALL NF's are like this...that i'm not sure of) and if you don't think the same way then how do you react..
    what is your approach?


    '' I'm not sure if it is a type-related issue or not, but this is my hypothesis about how some NFs might get stuck in such a dynamic. Unhealthy emotional interaction can have pitfalls for people who are invested in resolving emotional contexts and have a tendency to be more abstract and analytical about it. People who are especially pragmatic in their relationships are less likely to put up with destructive dynamics. The problem with looking at someone from the inside and in a more holistic manner is that all of their dysfunction and emotional baggage can often be understood within the context of their life. When you understand a detrimental dynamic they had with their mother as a child, it is easy to feel a kind of responsibility to undo that suffering while forgetting that once some of these things are imprinted on a person, they do remain throughout a lifetime. Having a deeper understanding of why someone is the way they are can increase a sense of tolerance. I suppose in viewing the entire picture this can also reveal the kinds of boundaries they need to recover. The process of creating boundaries can take longer if the person is bothering to go into an exhaustive analysis of the whole thing. In that way the NF can arrive at the same conclusion as someone viewing the present external dynamic, but it can take longer because they will first examine the whole history of it.''

  2. #2
    Senior Member IndyGhost's Avatar
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    I've been involved in one mentally abusive relationship. I never loved him, was rather pushed into the relationship, and had difficulty finding my way out, as he manipulated the people around me out of my life.

    I don't know that I consciously took the effort to understand why he was the way he was... but over time, I did eventually come to analyze and break it down. And with him, it had a family root.

    However, this didn't give me more patience or tolerance to deal with him. I recall one time a moment where he was crying in front of me. I stood up and told him, "I don't care!"

    This might seem cold of me to not care when he's crying... but he manipulated me. A lot. And to the point where I didn't know up from down. I didn't know who I was or who he was. And basically, I didn't trust his tears. It didn't help that he was also a drama major. Because of this relationship, I eventually had an emotional breakdown. It was a serious crisis and it took me a long time to recover.


    Now that the relationship has long passed, I've forgiven him and have more compassion towards him. However, one of my friends is now dating him and facing similar dilemmas. I have little sympathy for her for getting herself involved with him, considering she watched the whole thing go down with me and him. I suppose, that's very cold.
    "I don't know a perfect person.
    I only know flawed people who are still worth loving."
    -John Green

  3. #3
    veteran attention whore Jeffster's Avatar
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    No, I definitely don't think that way. It had way too many big words.
    Jeffster Illustrates the Artisan Temperament <---- click here

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  4. #4

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    No, not really. I can understand how events can affect someone's ability to relate but feel somewhat detached from fixing things myself. To me, relationships tend to feel like the specific dynamic between me and that person. And I seem to judge it on those merits.

    Make sense?

  5. #5
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    I'm not really an ENFP, it's just that they are really annoying people.

    Sounds like you dated an F type personality, sounds like NF.

    ENFJ, ENFP can be demanding and quite manipulative.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by betterthandead View Post
    I'm not really an ENFP, it's just that they are really annoying people.


    Sounds like you dated an F type personality, sounds like NF.

    ENFJ, ENFP can be demanding and quite manipulative.



  7. #7
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    To the OP: Yes, this is how NFs think and discuss relationship dynamics. I don't know why you thought ISFP. I would say it could be any of the NF types, but if you're sure of FP, I'd go ENFP if they want to "fix" people. I attribute that to ENFPs and NFJs more than INFPs.

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