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[SP] Clue me in here, dudes..

Amargith

Hotel California
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See, I love it when the Intuitives admit that they just make stuff up to suit their own imaginations. If only my ex-wife was as mature as you. :D

Ahh...but am I right? :devil:
 

Amargith

Hotel California
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It's interesting, I have a very hard time getting a feel for people over the internet.

*smiles* I can imagine. I have a harder time reading someone when I'm observing that person irl and I haven't approached them yet, than when I get to talk to them online one on one. I get some info out of studying their bodylanguage and the way they behave, but not like you boys do. I *do* however learn *a lot* about them when I hear them talking to someone else, as at that point their word order, voice and bodylanguage in the interaction is filled with clues.

But given a choice..I'll take printed text over physical silent presence any day to read someone...unless it's a se-user :devil:

You guys talk through your body, I find, and the text/talk is way harder to read.
 

gromit

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6,508
Tell me something, SP's..

I find myself,when in the presence of an Se-user, to somehow be at a loss for words. Or rather..they shut me up by not saying anything themselves. :blush:

All I know is, we're talking, something sweet or meaningful is said and there's this ....pause. Then there's the look (even online they do 'the look', I have *no* clue how!). Possibly accompanied by some bodylanguage. Time f*cking stands still, as they gaze at you, seemingly saying a million things at once without even uttering a word. Or at least, that's how it feels. There's this sense of understanding, of being in sync, or reciprocation, or of sheer bewilderment, of connecting...

And then the moment passes and they mention casually somethign about wanting to grab a soda, leaving me to wonder if I all imagined it :doh:


Tell me I aint dreaming this. Tell me this isn't just me, that they're actually aware of it and experience this as well. And tell me if they experience it the way I do, or if I'm just frigging high on my own feelings at that time :doh:

Hm. I am not sure if I know what you mean. Are you talking about some kind of non-verbal emotional/sexual connection? Does it happen with people you're not attracted to?

I don't know if I can be sure we are talking about the same thing without some kind of common experience to reference.
 

Amargith

Hotel California
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It happens with people that I have an emotional connection with, be it from the beginning or becoz it grew. It's a moment of understanding..a click, really. And no, it doesn't have to be sexual..it's usually with someone I respect very much, or just came to understand however.
 

stellar renegade

PEST that STEPs on PETS
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Hey stellar...why is this sooo typical of you :D
Cuz I'm a hedonist at heart, Amargith. ;) :D

Tell me this, babydoll, why are you such a frickin' TEASE? :nono: :2up:

Not that I care anymore, of course. I got a girl, hah. ;) :tongue10: :woot:

Oh, and I have kind of have trouble reading peeps over the web, too. Long-distance communication is kinduva bitch. I hate talking on the phone worst of all, no visuals. I just feel lost.
 

Amargith

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Cuz I'm a hedonist at heart, Amargith. ;) :D

Tell me this, babydoll, why are you such a frickin' TEASE? :eek:

Not that I care anymore, of course. I got a girl, hah. ;)

Oh, and I have kind of a hard time reading peeps over the web, too. Long-distance communication is kinda a bitch. I hate talking on the phone worst of all, no visuals. I just feel lost.

Are you seriously babydolling me? :D

And what are you actually asking me for, how I experience it, why I do it, or what my deeper motivation for it is? (aka what past issues could possibly cause me to behave this way)....or was it purely a rethorical question? :alttongue:
 

stellar renegade

PEST that STEPs on PETS
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...yeah, if you mean a rhetorical BURN. ;) :harhar:

I kid because I love. :happy:

Off-topic, I just put the finishing touches on that post while I was scampering between the bus and my credit union a few blocks away to deposit my check at the drive-up before it closed in less than ten minutes, all while juggling a huge carton of cereal boxes.

Now that's skillz. :rock: :2ar15:

Also, we needa have an off-topic smiley :offtopic: with a huge ornery grin on its face. :D
 

Kingfisher

full of love
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All I know is, we're talking, something sweet or meaningful is said and there's this ....pause. Then there's the look (even online they do 'the look', I have *no* clue how!). Possibly accompanied by some bodylanguage. Time f*cking stands still, as they gaze at you, seemingly saying a million things at once without even uttering a word. Or at least, that's how it feels. There's this sense of understanding, of being in sync, or reciprocation, or of sheer bewilderment, of connecting...

And then the moment passes and they mention casually somethign about wanting to grab a soda, leaving me to wonder if I all imagined it :doh:


Tell me I aint dreaming this. Tell me this isn't just me, that they're actually aware of it and experience this as well. And tell me if they experience it the way I do, or if I'm just frigging high on my own feelings at that time :doh:

yeah, i love moments like that++
they set a great tone too - you have that little connection between you that has bridged a gap, and it makes you more free and in tune, it makes this closeness between you that you can keep building on to make more connections and synchronization.

after a moment like that, when the SP grabs a soda or something...... it is because that connection between us makes that soda the sweetest one we've ever tasted! a great connection with somebody makes all of life taste better!! :thumbup:

It's interesting, I have a very hard time getting a feel for people over the internet.

tell me about it!! so do i.
something gets lost.
 

wolfy

awsm
Joined
Jun 30, 2008
Messages
12,251
It's interesting, I have a very hard time getting a feel for people over the internet.

I think it is rhythm, the internet has no rhythm. It lacks pace, things hang too much to really get a feel. You do over time, but it takes a lot longer than real life.

Intense experiences just make me want to move. It is reading the ebb and flow of everything and working with it.
 

Poki

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I think it is rhythm, the internet has no rhythm. It lacks pace, things hang too much to really get a feel. You do over time, but it takes a lot longer than real life.

Intense experiences just make me want to move. It is reading the ebb and flow of everything and working with it.

This is what I struggle with online. The hanging, its like a constant disconnect/connect online, probably because the way I work. Being in the moment overrides anticipation.
 

ayoitsStepho

Twerking & Lurking
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I think it is rhythm, the internet has no rhythm. It lacks pace, things hang too much to really get a feel. You do over time, but it takes a lot longer than real life.

Intense experiences just make me want to move. It is reading the ebb and flow of everything and working with it.

+1 This is how I pretty much how I work.
 

Cbelle

New member
Joined
Aug 20, 2010
Messages
56
MBTI Type
ENFP
Tell me something, SP's..

I find myself,when in the presence of an Se-user, to somehow be at a loss for words. Or rather..they shut me up by not saying anything themselves. :blush:

All I know is, we're talking, something sweet or meaningful is said and there's this ....pause. Then there's the look (even online they do 'the look', I have *no* clue how!). Possibly accompanied by some bodylanguage. Time f*cking stands still, as they gaze at you, seemingly saying a million things at once without even uttering a word. Or at least, that's how it feels. There's this sense of understanding, of being in sync, or reciprocation, or of sheer bewilderment, of connecting...

And then the moment passes and they mention casually somethign about wanting to grab a soda, leaving me to wonder if I all imagined it :doh:


Tell me I aint dreaming this. Tell me this isn't just me, that they're actually aware of it and experience this as well. And tell me if they experience it the way I do, or if I'm just frigging high on my own feelings at that time :doh:

It's not just you. I feel the exact same way about my ISTP, even though he's Te/Si.

Sometimes I think he has the entire experiences of the world in his eyes, and it's the same with his touch (just the tiniest touches, we've not even held hands yet, I don't know what will happen then.) I am addicted. I can walk away either gasping for breath or in a complete daze. :blush:
 

Azure Flame

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Oh hello Cbelle.

I'd tell ya, Satine, but that would ruin the magic.
 

Esoteric Wench

Professional Trickster
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Satine, I think that the responses to this thread are perfect illustration of how different Ns and Ss are. And, no... I don't think the SP you feel this intense connection with experiences it in the same way that you and I do.

But that doesn't mean that they can't feel connected to us. I've come to believe that SPs (especially Dom Se's) are about love in its tangible form. They convey their love by their actions... and I've gradually learned to not expect the deep, meaningful connections that you and I might share.

But it still completely baffles me to think that S's experience these interactions in such a different way than I do. <Sigh.>
 

stellar renegade

PEST that STEPs on PETS
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Well hey, maybe you could pop us some pill or mix us up a brew that'll get that magical kinetic love switch turned on. :newwink:

To me, the greatest expression of love is definitely physical. Not getting that from my mate = heartbreak. :cry:
 

nozflubber

DoubleplusUngoodNonperson
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FYI SPs - I'm the one that got Satine to start using the word "dudes". I know, I know, I rule.
 

Amargith

Hotel California
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Well hey, maybe you could pop us some pill or mix us up a brew that'll get that magical kinetic love switch turned on. :newwink:

To me, the greatest expression of love is definitely physical. Not getting that from my mate = heartbreak. :cry:


Actually...didn't you recently fall in love with an ISFJ? :devil:

I know you live in the present and immensely enjoy physical stuff, but here's a question for ya...


When you realized you were in love with her, those feelings...do they surface also during such a moment as I just described? Do those feelings for that matter surface when you are amidst the act of physical love (omg what a sentence :D)? Or, for that matter, when did they surface and what triggered them? What still triggers them? And if they don't arise during a moment like the one in the OP...what does go through your mind at that point?

I know that when I have a moment like that with someone, there's feelings of utter respect, love (in its broadest sense), understanding and bewilderment that arise. I *love* it. And it seems to be most intense with NTJs and STPs, people I naturally feel drawn to. With NFPs, it's more of a mutual feeling safe thing that goes on..a relief really.

FYI SPs - I'm the one that got Satine to start using the word "dudes". I know, I know, I rule.

He did, ya know :coffee:
 

Esoteric Wench

Professional Trickster
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Satine, I think that the responses to this thread are perfect illustration of how different Ns and Ss are. And, no... I don't think the SP you feel this intense connection with experiences it in the same way that you and I do.

But that doesn't mean that they can't feel connected to us. I've come to believe that SPs (especially Dom Se's) are about love in its tangible form. They convey their love by their actions... and I've gradually learned to not expect the deep, meaningful connections that you and I might share.

But it still completely baffles me to think that S's experience these interactions in such a different way than I do. <Sigh.>

I just re-read my post and want to clarify something. I was NOT trying to say that that SPs don't have deep, meaningful connections with other people. I worded that poorly.

I was trying to say that how they experience those connections is like apples and oranges (when compared to NFs).

I process abstract information first. I'm all about concepts and ideas. So love feels more REAL to me in its conceptual form. Thus, the articulation of my feelings, being able to proclaim my love from a mountaintop, is very important to this kind of love.

Not so with SPs. I used to feel that they didn't love as deeply as I did. Now I realize I was wrong. It's just it was almost incomprehensible to me that anyone else could experience love any other way.
 
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