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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by poki View Post
    I fought this internally with my brother forever when he cheated on his wife with his current wife. Not a big fan of cheating and its something I would have to work past as well. Would need to understand the whole context for that situation though before I could say if I could get past it or not.
    Had a good friend for eight years, that told me he'd cheated with one of his direct reports. At least once a month, there was an activity I'd bring a girlfriend along where we'd visit him, his wife and kids. Or it'd be just me and him, taking his sons out for a sporting activity.

    I asked if he were going to talk about it with his wife. He said, "Hell, no are you crazy?"

    That was pretty much the end of the friendship. I couldn't make myself go do the next planned activity, and be around his wife and kids knowing. I didn't want to bring my girlfriend around anymore to visit with the family.

    Thinking if your wife can't trust you...I can't trust you either.

    If he'd chose to talk with her, or felt bad about it. I'd still had some low level feeling to work through. But I think the friendship would/could have survived.

  2. #12
    Senior Member KDude's Avatar
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    c'mon! i talk deep issues. i give you guys my resistance to cuckolding story.. pat on the back or slap on the face?

  3. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by KDude View Post
    c'mon! i talk deep issues. i give you guys my resistance to cuckolding story.. pat on the back or slap on the face?
    Well, I just now flipped back a page... Asked myself what's he talking about, I wrote a frickn' reply because I thought Kdude's post/element to the topic was awesome!

    Then I opened a seperate browser and noticed...it'd probably helped a whole freakn' lot if I'd hit submit before I stepped away.

  4. #14
    Senior Member KDude's Avatar
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    lol..it's cool. i was just curious if some of you istps would be ok with that, even though you may not like cheating? where does your sense of integrity spring from, etc? i don't even think that's an integrity issue per se.

  5. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by KDude View Post
    lol..it's cool. i was just curious if some of you istps would be ok with that, even though you may not like cheating? where does your sense of integrity spring from, etc?
    If a single man's been decieved by a married woman, or any other possible scenario. It's the intention that counts with me. Some things in life simply aren't our fault or responsibility.

    Sense of integrity? Not exactly sure..excepting I suspect it has to do with a core ISTP theme of "trust." And for some un-known reason the concept of honor and duty, was important briefly for a pre-schooler. The words just popped in my head one day, and it's a concept I felt strongly.

    What about you? any idea where it comes from? I tend to think for myself it's innate.

  6. #16
    Senior Member KDude's Avatar
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    .. i dunno where i'm going with this really. i just saw it as a bizarre scenario where i might be the selfish bastard, in a certain light i don't think he could get it up (at the time, he'd been od'ing and shit), his wife probably needed to get laid.

  7. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by KDude View Post
    .. i dunno where i'm going with this really. i just saw it as a bizarre scenario where i might be the selfish bastard, in a certain light i don't think he could get it up (at the time, he'd been od'ing and shit), his wife probably needed to get laid.

  8. #18
    Senior Member millerm277's Avatar
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    I haven't cheated, or (to my knowledge) been cheated on. I have pretty much no respect for it, and it's immediate grounds for breaking up, in my opinion.

    I have a strong sense of integrity and loyalty.....and really, learning to control your damn impulses and act responsibly, is a part of being an adult. If you're doing it in a planned out manner, just break the relationship off rather than lying.

    My thoughts can be summarized in: I have a major issue with someone intentionally breaking the trust placed in them by another person close to them, to the point of it being nearly inexcusable.

    Note: If you're in an open relationship or something similar, then do whatever you want, I'm not judging your lifestyle.
    I-95%, S-84%, T-89%, P-84%

  9. #19
    Just a statistic rhinosaur's Avatar
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    I cheated once. I was immature, it was a mistake, and I hurt my SO. I should have just ended the relationship before I cheated.

    Now, if I'm in a closed relationship, where you trust me not to cheat, then I trust you not to cheat as well. Violating that trust is pretty detrimental, and I'd probably end the relationship. Hasn't happened yet though.

  10. #20
    Senior Member man's Avatar
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    no i would never cheat on someone
    and i expect them to not cheat on me

    it is simple as that
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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