I have an acquaintance who I am pretty sure is ESFP – though she could possibly be ESTP – and I would characterize her as relentlessly cheerful. Would you say this is typically ESFP?
I don’t know her that well, though we have mutual friends. We could have spent more time together if we’d chosen but we have just never clicked sufficiently. I think we more or less like each other but I find her a bit too, well, relentlessly cheerful and party-party-party, while I’m fairly sure she finds me a bit too withdrawn, serious and maybe even pessimistic.
I get the feeling she may be someone who’s had some unpleasant experiences in her life and her way of dealing with them is the relentless cheerfulness. I do know her parents are divorced and she seems to have made her friends her “family” rather than her actual family. She is also very overweight and I imagine that could have been at least sometimes difficult. She is actually very pretty and dresses and presents herself very well – but still she is very overweight, especially in a city and social milieu where people are very fashion and appearance-conscious and most people in her social circle aren’t overweight (to that extent anyway). I would definitely say she is popular, though.
I do wonder sometimes if someone like her acknowledges sadness and the darker side of life to her closer friends (she has a huge circle of friends/acquaintances, but is definitely a bit closer to some of those than to others). It just seems like whenever we’ve spoken she’s like “everyone in this city is just so fantastic, that’s why I’m planning to stay” and “I had such a fun fun fun weekend”…etc. She also seems to sort of flirt with everyone, of both genders, as a way of winning them over.
I think she is a nice girl but basically I am somewhat caught between finding her a bit irritating, with the non-stop happy happy happy and the flirting and so on, and being a little jealous…yes…not that most people I know perceive me as a huge pessimist, but it is certainly a part of who I am!
This might also co-relate to the ennegram 7 “running away from pain” thing – though she seems like she might also be a 2. One or the other.
I hope this doesn’t sound bitchy. I basically like her but I do find people like her a bit exhausting. And I am not sure whether to find them superficial, or to admire the cheerfulness against all odds.
Given that I've posted this in the SP section, you SPs are probably just going to think I'm a bit weird and sad for having a problem with (or wondering about) someone being cheerful all the time.