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[ISTP] ISTPS and love

oxymoron

New member
Joined
Mar 14, 2010
Messages
26
I am currently going out with, what I am pretty sure is an ISTP.
He is very into me, and in some point I feel he is "focusing" in on me-which is cool, and kinda creepy.
He also displays some traits which I am not so sure is characteristic of ISTPs or maybe they are. If they dont knock out him being an ISTP, Im kinda curious to know where they are coming from lol.

He isnt communicative about how he feels, but sometimes he will send sappy romantic texts, since he knows I like them. They come off as weird-not too genuine, coming from him.

He likes to help people, mostly with practical things and giving advice. Hes very vague in the relationship-I know hes crazy over me, but I have no clue as to why. However, he is always trying to help in some way-mostly in trying to explain why I should get engaged to him and how he can help relationship. On topic, he is always asking "what I can do to help" -not sure with what, but he is good at sensing what I need and buying me presents, and going along with what I want, and being very tolerant and uncritical of me, and even offering to go to the airport at 4am with me. Sorta like Mr. fix it guy

He likes to be better safe than sorry with safety and is concerned about my safety, but boy does he take risks as well.

When vulnerable-about 10% of the time, he will express compassion for someone, a slightly more feeling side or talk about his grandmas last days.

Hes not intropective so he thinks he more emotional and heart centered than he is and even almost tested as feeler.

He is skeptical, opinionated, defensive and likes to debate. Not that I think thats a bad thing.

Also-he NEVER really talks about himself, on a personal level.
 

Oom

Your time is gonna come.
Joined
Mar 29, 2009
Messages
510
MBTI Type
IsfP
Enneagram
5w4
Sound a lot like how I am and I see the way you get confused by someone like him. But know that if he sacrifices his time and give effort towards you and your happiness then he obviously cares for you. I really identified with not sharing personal details and being vulnerable. I don't like to share my thoughts and tribulations with other people, its just not something I enjoy.

Sounds like you've got yourself a good dude.:)
 

sLiPpY

New member
Joined
Oct 14, 2009
Messages
2,003
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Is it spring or something? :whistling:
 

Sinmara

Not Your Therapist
Joined
Nov 9, 2009
Messages
1,075
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
6w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I don't know but I'm getting rather burned out on all the ISTP obsessed threads. I mean, I know you guys are some sort of sparkly mysterious unicorn, but people could try reading the other billion ISTP threads from the past few months before adding their own relationship angst to the pile.
 

OrangeAppled

Sugar Hiccup
Joined
Mar 20, 2009
Messages
7,626
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I don't know but I'm getting rather burned out on all the ISTP obsessed threads. I mean, I know you guys are some sort of sparkly mysterious unicorn, but people could try reading the other billion ISTP threads from the past few months before adding their own relationship angst to the pile.

ESTPs talk more....there's less to puzzle out (in a good way). ;)
 

Sinmara

Not Your Therapist
Joined
Nov 9, 2009
Messages
1,075
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
6w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
ESTPs talk more....there's less to puzzle out (in a good way). ;)

Still, it'd be nice if people actually read the stack of ISTP threads on the first page before posting. It seems they're asking the same questions over and over.

I should make an ISTP FAQs and ask them to make it a sticky. :p
 

Amargith

Hotel California
Joined
Nov 5, 2008
Messages
14,717
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4dw
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
This will only stop if the ISTPs on here make an 'How to date/fall in love with an ISTP and what to expect?'-manual :D
 

ayoitsStepho

Twerking & Lurking
Joined
Sep 20, 2009
Messages
4,838
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
Still, it'd be nice if people actually read the stack of ISTP threads on the first page before posting. It seems they're asking the same questions over and over.

I should make an ISTP FAQs and ask them to make it a sticky. :p

That's exactly what I was thinking about yesterday. Just give those who are looking for ISTP relationship help, a separate thread that explains everything. I'd even link them to past ISTP issue threads.

Some of us other SP's need some loving :cry:.
 

Rainne

One day and the next
Joined
Mar 7, 2010
Messages
875
MBTI Type
ISTP
We're so simple, yet no one understands us...
 

LEGERdeMAIN

New member
Joined
Aug 16, 2009
Messages
2,516
I just want someone to blow me every so often. Is that too much to ask?

And...

I'm a magical box that needs to be opened, will you help me? *mysteriousness*
 

Bamboo

New member
Joined
Jan 28, 2009
Messages
2,689
MBTI Type
XXFP
FWIW, the OP didn't ask any questions (explicitly, at least)...it was just a write up of what's going on with the guy she is dating. Implicitly, she's wondering if some traits are typical ISTP, or if they aren't, than "what's up with that?" or "where are these from?"*

It's strikes me more as reference material or a sounding board to discuss the whole "ISTP in love" concept than the more typical angst and confusion on the subject.


To the OP and others: I identified most with the fixing things or looking for ways to improve situation with someone I like. If I like you I'm going to be actively looking for ways to make your life easier or provide value.

Mainly cause I'm good at it, and it's beneficial for both parties.



*As for these questions, keep in mind that mbti only tells you a little bit, and individual cases may vary. See my sig for an idea why. The map is not the territory.



All this said, yes, there is an enormous amount of source material already on the site regarding ISTPs in relationships.
 

LEGERdeMAIN

New member
Joined
Aug 16, 2009
Messages
2,516
I've never seen so many references to korzybski, outside of a class/lecture setting, than I have on TypoC....specifically in SP threads.


I think you should dump this guy. he obviously isn't for you. I would recommend dating someone who's type-ambiguous.
 

sLiPpY

New member
Joined
Oct 14, 2009
Messages
2,003
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
This will only stop if the ISTPs on here make an 'How to date/fall in love with an ISTP and what to expect?'-manual :D

Why bother? There's already a DVD series out. The first two seasons of Smallville. ;)
 

oxymoron

New member
Joined
Mar 14, 2010
Messages
26
Thanks for the posts :)

Bamboo, Oom, others...that was helpful. But yes-I like the guy. We get on great :)
I was just curious-since he identifies ALOT with the ISTP desciption in every way, except for the traits I posted in the first post-I wasnt so sure if that CAN be as ISTP, or will knock it out..and why ISTPs can display those traits-
Which is what Bamboo said.
 

Bamboo

New member
Joined
Jan 28, 2009
Messages
2,689
MBTI Type
XXFP
Oh, yeah, none of what you described rule out "ISTP" as his type.

I will add the caution (beating a dead horse, maybe) not to evaluate too strongly on his type, everybody is different as I said. There are more important factors than just what is measured in MBTI in terms of determining how long two people are going to get along...general maturity, mutual esteem and respect...the list goes on.

Glad I helped.
 

Willfrey

New member
Joined
Nov 9, 2008
Messages
615
MBTI Type
IsTP
I just want someone to blow me every so often. Is that too much to ask?

And...

I'm a magical box that needs to be opened, will you help me? *mysteriousness*

HA! Make this as an OP in a new thread and we have our sticky.
 

sLiPpY

New member
Joined
Oct 14, 2009
Messages
2,003
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
All I want is for her to always say "I'm right!" and bring me a beer. :)
 
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