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  1. #21
    Freshman Member simulatedworld's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jeejeek View Post
    Actually he did fix my water heater in my apartment...He asked me for days afterward if it was still working and told me I could call him anytime if I need it fix it again
    That settles it. He wants to get in your pants.
    If you could be anything you want, I bet you'd be disappointed--am I right?

  2. #22
    One day and the next Rainne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by simulatedworld View Post
    That settles it. He wants to get in your pants.
    Pretty sure he's more concerned about the water heater.

  3. #23
    Widdles in your cream.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rainne View Post
    Pretty sure he's more concerned about the water heater.
    He doesn't want it to be cold when all unnecessary clothing is removed.
    Um, yeah.

  4. #24
    Senior Member toast's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Craft View Post
    Why are ISTP's so popular?
    'Cause they're good at 'life'. And they're hot.


    ...And they're confusing.



    To the OP, keep in mind you can't have contact with him on a 'just friends' basis if you are 'obsessed'. My advice is first & foremost, get rid of some of this infatuation by getting him out of your head more than he is in it, if that's even possible, before you proceed. I, for one, can say the whole xNFJ to ISTP obsession can starve you of all security & rationality. You try to be around him while you feel that strongly for him & you will keep hooking up when you aren't emotionally secure enough for it to be a good thing. Eventually, giving in will start to go against your values & then you are really in the potty. Then its insecurity, self-doubt, shame, confusion, frustration, you name it... none of which will get you a relationship.
    ____________________________________________
    "In my soul rages a battle without victor. Between faith without proof and reason without charm." - Sully Prudhomme

  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by toast View Post
    To the OP, keep in mind you can't have contact with him on a 'just friends' basis if you are 'obsessed'. My advice is first & foremost, get rid of some of this infatuation by getting him out of your head more than he is in it, if that's even possible, before you proceed. I, for one, can say the whole xNFJ to ISTP obsession can starve you of all security & rationality. You try to be around him while you feel that strongly for him & you will keep hooking up when you aren't emotionally secure enough for it to be a good thing. Eventually, giving in will start to go against your values & then you are really in the potty. Then its insecurity, self-doubt, shame, confusion, frustration, you name it... none of which will get you a relationship.
    Tell me about it, I think my dad was an ISTP and I grew up feeling he never loved me...I think I was seventeen when he finally did...I burst into tears because it had been so long that I wanted to hear these words from him. Him? He was amused and had a good laugh at my expense. And here I am getting involved with an ISTP...yikes
    Last edited by jeejeek; 03-25-2010 at 02:04 PM.

  6. #26
    Senior Member toast's Avatar
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    Ouch. I don't think anything could be worse than father issues in an NFJ with an STP. I had some mild trouble with my dad (basically he played the part but always had a very obvious distance that made me just sort of 'know' he didn't feel much for us) but I never had any issues with it until my ISTP. I was always the 'chased' one in relationships with other Fs or Js and it wasn't bothersome to me so I was genuinely content. Then with the ISTP (and I think its somewhere in the STP but not necessarily the type), I found that distance & eventually recognized it may have been agitated by how similar it was to my father's. It is specifically that spontaneous eruption of emotion or vulnerability that is rarely shown through the obvious discomfort & anxiety at not knowing how to feign emotions that aren't there regularly. Like, I can look at a person I love & summon up insane & overwhelming feelings for them in milliseconds. Empathy does this immediately for me by nature. So an STP seems to struggle with not having that right there in case someone is looking for them to 'feel' something on the spot, and their deep feelings (even happiness & security with another person) erupt far too little for our comfort. I don't know if the past makes too much difference though, because its still a bad combo when it comes to staying "secure."
    ____________________________________________
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  7. #27
    Freshman Member simulatedworld's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jeejeek View Post
    Tell me about it, I think my dad was an ISTP and I grew up feeling he never loved me...I think I was seventeen when he told me he loved me and it made me cry it had been so long that I wanted to hear these words from him. And I here I am getting involved with an ISTP...yikes
    Might there be a correlation?
    If you could be anything you want, I bet you'd be disappointed--am I right?

  8. #28
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    The biggest love of my life was a ENTJ and we broke up a few years ago. Then I dated a ISTP for a year and it didn't work out for issues that weren't type related, as he was completely smitten with me from the beginning and made a big effort to integrate me into his life. This one I think I made an error from the beginning -- I actually made a joke on our third date that I like being called/texted once a day. He took me way too seriously and since then has been coming in/out of my life. He calls me a princess now and says that I'm too demanding.

    I think there's also a control issue involved, he always backs away when I suggest we get together then proposes another time, which is what he did this week. Perhaps I should just give up on this one given my history with my father and the way this relationship has progressed thus far...I don't know...

  9. #29
    Senior Member Rebe's Avatar
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    Why do NFs have a hard time making decisions? I have changed my mind with my istp about twenty times. He is still around. Huh.

  10. #30
    One day and the next Rainne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jeejeek View Post
    I think there's also a control issue involved, he always backs away when I suggest we get together then proposes another time, which is what he did this week. Perhaps I should just give up on this one given my history with my father and the way this relationship has progressed thus far...I don't know...
    i'll give you some istp pick up advice

    start the conversation with a bored "yo" -> he'll reply w/ a bored "yo"

    then proceed to bait him w/ a "what are you up to" in a tone as if you could care less what he's up to -> he'll probably reply w/ a "not much"

    then reel him in w/ a "yo you feel like chilling together?" as if you could care less either way -> he'll most likely reply w/ "ok", if he says "not really" (it's nothing personal, he genuinely doesn't feel like having company at that moment), try again later

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