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Thread: Birthday gifts

  1. #1
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    Thumbs up Birthday gifts

    Is it normal for ISFP's not to buy gifts for people supposed to be close to them?

    My ISFP sister-in-law used to buy me and my wife birthday gifts until a few years ago. We used to buy her until about a year ago bday gifts.

    About 7 years ago she would tell me she didn't have money but what would I like. I would say for three years its OK, take a raincheck.

    For my wife she hasn't bought for the last 5 years or so, even though she asks my wife waht she wants and my wife hints to her what she wants.

    Strangest is that she always says she doesn 't know what to buy my kids becuase they have everything.

    Why I am asking about whether this is normal is that recently while talking to a friend she overheard me talking about some perfume giftset I wanted and when it would go on sale. She then asked what it was specifically but the way she asked made me think she wanted to know so she could buy it for me because she wanted to know when is my birthday and when will I be coming down again ( I live in a city about 2hrs fklight away) and what my wife bought me, as my wife bought my gift beforehand.

    As it is when I was down there, there was no hint of a present and no mention of my son's birthday coming up soon.

    She always talks about my kids and professes to love them a lot(she's unmarried and in her 30's).

    I am thus wondering is this an indication that she doesn't really care about us and "pretends" to love my kids or is this normal behaviour for ISFP's? I always thought that with ISFP's their gift-giving of small thoughtful things is their trademark and indicates if they care for you?
    Last edited by Kambro; 03-24-2010 at 12:48 AM. Reason: spelling errors

  2. #2
    Senior Member KDude's Avatar
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    I doubt an ISFP is overly attentive to specific dates at least.

    But random gifts are possible, for sure. First time I met one particular ISFP, she gave me a random gift later on the night. Simply because I saw it hanging on her wall, complimented it... and at that point, we had already hit it off..so that was just something she wanted to do. Her husband may be ESFP, and he's done the same. I do the same with friends... kind of random gifts sometimes. Or if I see a particular need, I help out. One of my friend's camera broke recently, and I had a new one that I barely use, still in the box. So I just gave it to her.

    OTOH, I may never show up at your kid's bday party. OR your wedding. And maybe ISFP is sort of the same... :\

    [edit] Umm it needs to be said that might just be ISFP myself. Still confused. But either way, I don't have the most reliable habits. And I, too, profess a lot of affection for friends' kids. Sometimes I'm just not good with having a schedule and getting gifts in time. I might show up a little later with something though. Or it's something I ordered and I use the excuse that it didnt come in time. I bet anything though that an ESFJ or ISFJ would have ordered something far ahead of time.

  3. #3
    Senior Member countrygirl's Avatar
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    Gift giving is not my specialty. She might have had good intention but not any follow through. It does not mean she doesn't care.

  4. #4
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    Thanks - just surprised because I thought ISFP's remember dates of all the people and tend to be the ones who place a lot of meaning into the type of gift?

  5. #5
    Senior Member StrappingYoungLad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kambro View Post
    Thanks - just surprised because I thought ISFP's remember dates of all the people and tend to be the ones who place a lot of meaning into the type of gift?
    ISFJ is the type of those.

  6. #6
    it's tea time! Walking Tourist's Avatar
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    I prefer to make gifts but they don't always arrive in time.
    I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle and here is my spout. Every time I steam up, I give a shout. Just tip me over and pour me out.

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