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Thread: ESTP & ENTP

  1. #1
    "Everything in its place" fill's Avatar
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    Default ESTP & ENTP

    Saw an ESFP & ENFP post, so I thought I'd start this one-

    I've been seeing an ESTP. Don't know what to think yet. I do like her.

    But does anyone have any experience in this field?
    "Poor bastard. Wait 'till he sees the bats. "
    enneagram - 7/5/3

  2. #2
    Artisan Conquerer Halla74's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fill View Post
    Saw an ESFP & ENFP post, so I thought I'd start this one-

    I've been seeing an ESTP. Don't know what to think yet. I do like her.

    But does anyone have any experience in this field?
    You're in for a treat.

    ESTPs are crazy and fun to be around.

    They are aloof yet loving, kind but hardly a pushover, and practical as hell to have around.

    We do however have lavish tastes, but don't expect our S.O's to accomodate them, as by the time we hit dating age we have already been providing for exhorbitant tastes for some years.

    We are strong willed, and don't like being told what to do.

    If we do hurt your feelings it sure as hell wasn't intentional. We have deep feelings, and know how we feel, but are emotionally retarded when it comes to gauging the feelings of others, and we are not comfortable "making decisions" with our feelings, at least not until older (34 in my case).

    Although I am a male, the things I point out to you seem very common in me as they do in female ESTPs. I know a tested and verified ESFP female IRL, and two suspected ESTPs, I haven't been able to talk either in to taking an online MBTI test, because they're too busy doing other shit.

    Cool female ESTPs on this site include Pettycure, Pillows, lookingglassworld, Une_Autre, ESTPMarie, and ESTPgirl.

    Any other questions, ask the gorgeous ladies above...
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    BIG 5 -> Extroversion 77% ; Accommodation 60% ; Orderliness 62% ; Emotional Stability 64% ; Open Mindedness 74%

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  3. #3
    Playnerd Timeless's Avatar
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    My experience with an ESTP (verified) has been something like this:

    Me:



    Her:



    That girl made me feel more I then E!

    I was relaxed while she was bouncing off the walls... literally.

    She could not stop moving, or talking, even before we went out she was already in party mode. It was all good. I didn't mind. While you're thinking ahead, or behind, she's thinking in the moment. Refreshing in a way. There were times were she thought she was being annoying, and I had to reassure her every time: not at all.

    I did see a hint of other life besides her wildness; reading.

    Me personally, it's cool for partying and having a fun exciting time; 24/7. I'm already like that mentally in my huge imagination and adding more fire to fire is gonna burn something eventually. I personally gravitate towards someone more calmer then me with drops of wildness, so to speak.

    Keep in mind, I'm just basing it off this uno ESTP girl I know in the real world. I know everybody is different.

    Hey, you might like it though.


  4. #4
    "Everything in its place" fill's Avatar
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    Thanks to the both of you!

    I'll keep what you said in mind, Halla.

    Timeless, that's pretty much what I think of her. She likes little "games" and stuff like, "the hat game." It's supposed to annoy people (SJs), and I just shrug and walk away, haha. As the INTP father from Cat's Cradle states, "Why should I bother with made-up games when there are so many real ones going on?"
    "Poor bastard. Wait 'till he sees the bats. "
    enneagram - 7/5/3

  5. #5
    Senior Member une_autre's Avatar
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    My best friend is an ENTP. Okay, it is not a romantic relationship (unless we are intoxicated).

    But, we do have similar mind sets and our thinking, in most of the cases, is the same.I am the down-to-earth part of our "couple".

    I am not a party-maniac. I will not enjoy a party unless with the right people and most certainly I can find more entertaining ways of spending a night than clubbing. I can be very wild as well, but that depends on a variety of factors (an important one being my evaluation of the situation).

    For the most part, I couldn't care less about what others think - I do whatever I please and as Halla said, I am very direct, there is no beating around the bush.
    With my friends, I try to be more considerate of their feelings though. I need to be around people and truly rely on my close ones. Without them, probably most of my self confidence would be gone.

    I have a really interesting relationship with my boyfriend. We have been together for a heap of time and most people think we treat each other awful. Obviously, I don't think that's the case. We fight a lot and I personally think that's great. Making up is great as well, I need some excitement in my life.
    Contrary to what might seem, I care a lot about him.
    And finally, I need freedom.

  6. #6
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    I dated an ESTP for a long while and he was definitely more outgoing and thrill seeking than I was, which is saying a lot. We had a lot of fun together and respected each other immensely. But we were both young (though, I was much younger than he) and EPs, so we partied a little too much for our own good. Strangely, in the end he was more comfortable with commitment and routine than I was (maybe it was the S?) and I bailed. But we're still good friends now after all these years. And I hear that he has finally cut down on his drinking now that he's 40...

    I say thumbs up, if you are in the same phase of life.

  7. #7
    "Everything in its place" fill's Avatar
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    These responses are encouraging.

    Yeah, she's wild. Not in a bad way, but she definitely makes me look like an introvert.

    Actually, I think the main difference between our "E"s is that I don't necessarily enjoy people, but I enjoy being around them. She doesn't necessarily enjoy people either, but she does like to interact with them- a lot. Which I really like. Because I don't have to always "be there" for her to have a good time. Even last night: I simply popped in and out of reading and hanging out with her and a group of people she was entertaining.

    There's one snag, and that's Fe. I don't know how to feel about her- when I really like someone I have this "fatherly" side of me that really wishes the best for them, and that side of me + her hating people telling her what to do = ljsdlfkjdslfj. I think with more trust between the two of us, we'll actually listen to each other's advice.

    Quote Originally Posted by Timeless View Post
    I did see a hint of other life besides her wildness; reading.
    Yes, this too. She reads a lot of books. More than I do (not that hard to do), but this actually got me into enjoying reading again.
    "Poor bastard. Wait 'till he sees the bats. "
    enneagram - 7/5/3

  8. #8
    Not Your Therapist Sinmara's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fill View Post
    Actually, I think the main difference between our "E"s is that I don't necessarily enjoy people, but I enjoy being around them. She doesn't necessarily enjoy people either, but she does like to interact with them- a lot.
    I'm not one of those people with a million friends I barely know. People tend to fit into three categories: People I know, acquaintances (party friends), and friends. There are lots of people I know, a group of acquaintances I like to hang out with for the social interaction and fun, and a precious few people I call friends. ESTPs can get along with a large group of people for the fun of it and not particularly care one way or another about them personally.

    There's one snag, and that's Fe. I don't know how to feel about her- when I really like someone I have this "fatherly" side of me that really wishes the best for them, and that side of me + her hating people telling her what to do = ljsdlfkjdslfj. I think with more trust between the two of us, we'll actually listen to each other's advice.
    Yeeeeah, be careful with that. I have a very, very developed sense of rebellion and if I think someone is trying to tell me what to do or control me when I think it's not their place to do so, I will do the exact opposite of what they want out of spite (which has seldom worked out in my favor, but it's the principle of the thing). It's nothing to do with my personal feelings for the person, it's more to demonstrate quite blatantly that they don't get to tell me what to do and I will make my own decisions.

    Not such a good habit to have, really. I grew up with a lot of people trying to control me. I'm working on it. ;P

    Make sure to have open lines of communication with her so she always understands where you're coming from. Halla's right in that ESTPs can be a bit emotionally retarded when it comes to other peoples feelings. Identifying what you're feeling and expressing it to her can help if you ever need to work through problems. Trust goes a long way with ESTPs and we'll be more willing to sit through the discomfort of figuring each other out if you've demonstrated that you're worth it.

    Yes, this too. She reads a lot of books. More than I do (not that hard to do), but this actually got me into enjoying reading again.
    I can't speak for other ESTPs, but as an ESTP with physical limitations who doesn't/can't get out much, I have a tendency to absolutely devour books. I can't be physically active in the way I'd like so I make up for it by being very mentally active. I've been told that I'm a wealth of absolutely random, but useful, information because I tend to pick up whatever's nearby and start reading, regardless of the subject matter. I love encyclopedias and dictionaries and any kind of reference materials and I like novels with complex storylines where I'm actually surprised by the ending. I like to try to figure out the ending as I go as a sort of game, so it's hard to find an original story where I can't guess who done it by halfway through or less.

  9. #9
    Not Your Therapist Sinmara's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Timeless View Post
    I was relaxed while she was bouncing off the walls... literally.
    Haha, and thus describes how I interact with my ENFJ friend! He sits there quietly smirking and watching me bounce around like a super ball, thoroughly amused by the way I positively gush exuberance. We also plot everyone's demise together, but that's another thread.

    There were times were she thought she was being annoying, and I had to reassure her every time: not at all.
    I'm always, always worried that I am annoying people, especially if I'm in a situation where I'm being my normal bouncy self and the other person is being quiet or reserved. If an ESTP stops to ask if she's being annoying, it's probably because she's concerned that you're not joining in with the fun as much as she is. We're aware that we can go overboard sometimes and will do the occasional check to see if we need to reign ourselves in if people show signs of being annoyed or uncomfortable.

  10. #10
    "Everything in its place" fill's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pettycure View Post
    I'm not one of those people with a million friends I barely know. People tend to fit into three categories: People I know, acquaintances (party friends), and friends. There are lots of people I know, a group of acquaintances I like to hang out with for the social interaction and fun, and a precious few people I call friends. ESTPs can get along with a large group of people for the fun of it and not particularly care one way or another about them personally.
    Yes, this. She's very in tune with either: a few people she knows well, or a large group she doesn't know at all. I don't want this to sound bad, but I think she thinks of people as replaceable. Like, if one leaves from a group she's talking to and another joins, she won't skip a beat. But it seems that she considers people like me 'irreplaceable'. I'm not sure anyone could fill my shoes either. Not that they're big or anything- my feet are just shaped weird.

    Yeeeeah, be careful with that. I have a very, very developed sense of rebellion and if I think someone is trying to tell me what to do or control me when I think it's not their place to do so, I will do the exact opposite of what they want out of spite (which has seldom worked out in my favor, but it's the principle of the thing). It's nothing to do with my personal feelings for the person, it's more to demonstrate quite blatantly that they don't get to tell me what to do and I will make my own decisions.

    Not such a good habit to have, really. I grew up with a lot of people trying to control me. I'm working on it. ;P
    Yeah, none of my opinion on what she should do is coming out. For a while. Really. I mean, I almost think she sees me as some sort of pushover the way I shrug things off, but I think she'll learn differently when a situation occurs where a line is crossed- or the fact that when I say I'm going to do something, I'm really going to do it. I think people tend to mistake my nonchalant behavior for a lack of motivation- quite the contrary.

    Make sure to have open lines of communication with her so she always understands where you're coming from. Halla's right in that ESTPs can be a bit emotionally retarded when it comes to other peoples feelings. Identifying what you're feeling and expressing it to her can help if you ever need to work through problems.
    Should I be completely honest how something makes me feel, then? Like, I'm ethnic (Black/Puerto Rican), and she'll crack black jokes. A lot. Like, a lot. And I'm not really offended- but I honestly don't give two shits about my race- I don't identify with people for a default trait. So in a way I feel I'm being labelled. I told her if she cracks on on MLK day, shit's gonna go down. I almost hope she does.

    Trust goes a long way with ESTPs and we'll be more willing to sit through the discomfort of figuring each other out if you've demonstrated that you're worth it.
    That's good to know- I feel the same way.

    I can't speak for other ESTPs, but as an ESTP with physical limitations who doesn't/can't get out much, I have a tendency to absolutely devour books. I can't be physically active in the way I'd like so I make up for it by being very mentally active. I've been told that I'm a wealth of absolutely random, but useful, information because I tend to pick up whatever's nearby and start reading, regardless of the subject matter. I love encyclopedias and dictionaries and any kind of reference materials and I like novels with complex storylines where I'm actually surprised by the ending. I like to try to figure out the ending as I go as a sort of game, so it's hard to find an original story where I can't guess who done it by halfway through or less.
    Very interesting indeed! I was very surprised how well read she was, actually.
    "Poor bastard. Wait 'till he sees the bats. "
    enneagram - 7/5/3

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