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  1. #11
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Aww, I just read why it ended.
    This one unfortunately sounds tough to remend. Religion and basic values are a very important part of making a marriage work, as I'm sure you realize. I would suggest at least attempting to get over this guy in the right way, (though its much tougher, you'll have a much better result in the end!)

    Cry about it, write letters about it, tear them up, sleep, talk to friends, hot showers. Whatever it takes to make you feel better until it fades a little. I find this to be the most effective way of moving on. Just trudging through every day. No emails or anything to the ex, at any cost. Take care of yourself and be easy on yourself, love yourself and realize that this is a tough time for you.

    Even if you do decide to be together in the end, I think that right now you need to take the time to heal, become healthy again, and find out what you really need in a marriage, and take the space so that you can take a step back and become rational and objective again. You may find that he's not exactly what you were looking for.. and you'll find someone even more perfect than you ever imagined! (I know you don't believe that right now.)

    06/13 10:51:03 five sounds: you!!!
    06/13 10:51:08 shortnsweet: no you!!
    06/13 10:51:12 shortnsweet: go do your things and my things too!
    06/13 10:51:23 five sounds: oh hell naw
    06/13 10:51:55 shortnsweet: !!!!
    06/13 10:51:57 shortnsweet: (cries)
    06/13 10:52:19 RiftsWRX: You two are like furbies stuck in a shoe box

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  2. #12
    Senior Member Heinel's Avatar
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    Umm... This thread and that vindictive ENFP thread have me very scared of Fi users now... I just had a fallout with one too, I hope I don't get any of this...
    Check out my blog: http://OrnateRitual.com

  3. #13
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    Religion? ick!

    It's difficult for me to relate to a religious ISTP, in fact I haven't met a single one that took it seriously ever...after adulthood was reached.

    However, have found it interesting that many ISTP's often know more about differing religions than the individuals who feverently embrace them from a historical and contextual perspective.

    What other people believe is fascinating, especially when comparing to how other cultures have approached the same topic. Beyond that when it comes to actually practicing and believing? *ick!*

    Which doesn't mean I don't have friends that won't go with their wives occassionally and participate in an "activity" that's more concrete. When I was younger and going to a religious place routinely as part of something the family I grew up in simply did, it was just to hang out and do stuff with people my age vs. any real belief.

    I couldn't date someone that expected me to adopt their beliefs.

  4. #14
    Artisan Conquerer Halla74's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sLiPpY View Post
    Religion? ick!

    ...

    I couldn't date someone that expected me to adopt their beliefs.
    EXACTLY!!!
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  5. #15
    Senior Member countrygirl's Avatar
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    I have to agree with Slippy and Halla on this. Say goood bye and let him go. If it is so important to have someone with the same belief perhaps you can ask members of your church to help you with finding a spouse.

  6. #16
    Artisan Conquerer Halla74's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by countrygirl View Post
    I have to agree with Slippy and Halla on this. Say goood bye and let him go. If it is so important to have someone with the same belief perhaps you can ask members of your church to help you with finding a spouse.
    Yeah, preferably a wealthy and generous one, with a low IQ, and maybe a severe heart condition.
    --------------------
    Type Stats:
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  7. #17
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sLiPpY View Post
    It's difficult for me to relate to a religious ISTP, in fact I haven't met a single one that took it seriously ever...after adulthood was reached.
    I dated a religious ISTP. It was definitely surreal. It seemed like he picked and chose what tenets to hold fast to and what he would ditch according to what was convenient for him. But I guess everyone does that in some way, to some extent.

    I couldn't date someone that expected me to adopt their beliefs.
    yeah, the quote below bugs me:

    Quote Originally Posted by cooliogirly1000 View Post
    I wanted to marry him regardless and eventually come to a compromise together. I loved him so much that being different sects didn't matter anymore. I assumed he would gain more knowledge and come to realise my sect was the correct path.
    ...it doesn't seem like you really wanted compromise at all, you just wanted your own way.

    Quote Originally Posted by Heinel View Post
    Umm... This thread and that vindictive ENFP thread have me very scared of Fi users now... I just had a fallout with one too, I hope I don't get any of this...



    Ok, but back to the OP... Out of curiosity, what religion and sect are you talking about?

    As far as being hopelessly in love, it sounds like you are hopelessly obsessed. What was once love has become something twisted and distorted due to your pain and rejection. I think the only thing you can do is take all that love you used to have for him and turn it to yourself and to your faith. Get outside of your own mind and your own problems and go volunteer with kids who have cancer. Put these things in perspective.

    One man on this planet left you. There are 6 billion people on this earth, one of whom will show you all the love and respect that you deserve. In the meantime, try to find ways to love yourself. Just because one man doesn't see the beauty in you, it doesn't mean that you don't have any beauty.

  8. #18
    Senior Member toast's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sLiPpY View Post
    I've been teased that it's similar to peeling an onion. i.e. Get back together, ut..oh where'd that next layer come off from.
    Oh god, you guys are such onions. I actually had a dream once that my ISTP was stripping for me & wouldn't take anything off until I looked away uninterested. I woke up and realized that was so reflective of the whole relationship. Time and no entitlement/expectation and the layers come off.

    I can't imagine a "religious" ISTP. Seems like a pretty agnostic type. I can imagine one believing in something, but not being very into it. That's kind of scary.

    I kind of like how ISTPs just let you believe whatever you want when it comes to philosophical or religious ideas. Kind of sucks that they won't talk about them, but they don't really get down on you about them like they would about technical; practical matters, but they just sort of accept that they are part of you and even take care not to say anything that would seem like they are impeding.
    ____________________________________________
    "In my soul rages a battle without victor. Between faith without proof and reason without charm." - Sully Prudhomme

  9. #19
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    Wow, toast got it!

    n' what an interesting dream

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