ISTPs are egalitarians so trust is sine qua non. Deception and manipulation are no-nos. The good news is that ISTPs are always open to forgiveness, but not unless the offending party fesses up and restores equilibrium. Why? Because worrying about someone you can't trust takes up too much valuable energy ...best to put them in the deep freeze til honesty thaws their hearts and the equilibrium is restored.
Only Js are prone to absolute shut outs (religious extremists are all Js) ...Ps are always
open to redemption....after confession.
An offense that is lied about is much worse. I agree with the slippy.
“Some people will tell you that slow is good – but I’m here to tell you that fast is better. I’ve always believed this, in spite of the trouble it’s caused me. Being shot out of a cannon will always be better than being squeezed out of a tube. That is why God made fast motorcycles, Bubba…”
for the ISTP, showing remorse takes up too much time.
Oh I won't wait around for it..but it's essential to get me to trust you again. I can be friendly without though, but that's got it's limits
If someone hasn't learned from their mistakes by realizing they made one in the first place and fessing up to it, showing that they realize it was wrong.... I mean, what's a confession without remorse? It's the acknowledgement that they did something. That doesn't mean that they acknowledge that action to be therefore also somethign that should not be repeated because it caused harm to someone. Some people may confess something, promising never to do it again, without actually showing remorse. That's fine, but without that acceptance of guilt, it means they're more likely to do it again, as they did not see it as something to be avoid, just something they agreed would not do around the other person again. And that's fine, I have several 'agreements' like this, where someone pointed out that my behavior bothers them. I'll try to work around it, make sure it doesn't bother them agian, but I'll refuse to share their belief that what I did was 'wrong'.
When that is the case with another person, and I'm the one offended, I tend to try and understand where they come from, why they don't see it as a mistake and work around it. But I won't trust them again around that issue. Though I may very well do so on other matters