User Tag List

12 Last

Results 1 to 10 of 17

  1. #1
    Not Your Therapist Sinmara's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    6w5 sp/sx
    Socionics
    ILI Ni
    Posts
    1,092

    Default ESTP women vs other women

    I've never had luck with finding and keeping friends of my own sex. With the exception of two like-minded ladies I've been lucky enough to find, I've only ever had male friends. The only women I've ever gotten along with have always had a tomboyish streak in them. Women are largely an enigma to me.

    I'm not a girly-girl. I only use a purse because I need to be able to carry medicine with me. My idea of a cute outfit is a button-down shit over a cami with jeans. I like baseball and military-style caps. I do have dresses and heels and makeup and all that, but those are more special occasion sort of things.

    I don't understand the passive-aggressive, back-biting give-and-take I've observed from other girls I've known. I don't smack-talk other people in order to form a bond with my friends. That doesn't make me want to get closer to them, it just lets me know who not to trust. My directness and the fact that I don't reciprocate with the gossip tends to put off or confuse the women I've known.

    And notice, I keep saying "the women I've known." Not labeling or anything, this is based on my own experience.

    Do you other ESTP women tend to have a problem with this? I'm curious to see if this might be an issue associated with my personality type.

    Or maybe I just suck at identifying with my people. ;D

  2. #2
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    MBTI
    ISTP
    Enneagram
    9w8 sp/sx
    Posts
    1,636

    Default

    I hope the topic gets a reply, it would be interesting in that I've known a couple of females over time who...always had more guy friends.

  3. #3
    Senior Member SerengetiBetty's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    MBTI
    ENTP
    Enneagram
    7w8
    Socionics
    ILE
    Posts
    230

    Default

    Same problem. 99% of my female friends fall into the "manly" category. My best friends are ESTP, INTJ and ENTJ so when we get together empires crumble

    Lately I've been meeting more NFs and SFs. I think they sort of see me as their pet project, but i also see them as my pet projects too. i don't get some of their behavior - like being mad at a guy for not asking you out when you were going to say no anyway .

  4. #4
    Twerking & Lurking ayoitsStepho's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    4w3 so/sx
    Posts
    4,836

    Default

    I don't know if we have any other ESTP woman here. I may have seen one or two, but I cant remember :/
    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    ayoitsStepho is becoming someone else. Actually her true self, a rite of passage.

  5. #5
    Not Your Therapist Sinmara's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    6w5 sp/sx
    Socionics
    ILI Ni
    Posts
    1,092

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by sLiPpY View Post
    I hope the topic gets a reply, it would be interesting in that I've known a couple of females over time who...always had more guy friends.
    I'm honestly not expecting a lot. I know that I'm almost alone in this place. Just put the thread up in case any of my fellow ESTP ladies peek in.

    And you know, if any other people have this issue, I'd be interested to hear from them. I'm more interested in why it happens than hearing from the other ESTPs.

  6. #6
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Posts
    1,702

    Default

    I'm not sure how type related this is, I've seen ESTP girls that have lots of girl friends but they sorta come across as the protective dominant one of the group

  7. #7
    The Architect Alwar's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Posts
    922

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Unique View Post
    I'm not sure how type related this is, I've seen ESTP girls that have lots of girl friends but they sorta come across as the protective dominant one of the group
    The cockblockers?

  8. #8
    Freshman Member simulatedworld's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    ENTP
    Enneagram
    7w6 sx/so
    Socionics
    ILE
    Posts
    5,554

    Default

    I think there's maybe 3 ESTP women total on the entire board.

    I'm curious to hear responses from others too but I kinda doubt that you'll get any, unfortunately.
    If you could be anything you want, I bet you'd be disappointed--am I right?

  9. #9
    Junior Member GHC's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Posts
    23

    Default

    My best Friend though she is not an ESTP is a Self-acclaimed Tomboy. (I am not sure is she is an ISTP or ISFP)
    She is very laid-back, emotionally content and can sometimes shock or even annoy people with her bluntness and directedness especially girls who sometimes describe her as being “Tactless”. She collects and plays with videogames, Anime, Action figures, Anime& Videogames magazines; she enjoys playing soccer, paintball guns, etc.
    She even got into a fight with a boy who was trying to bully her and she end up punching the guy multiple times.

    For me she is a very nice, respectful, loyal, open-minded and optimistic person. She does have her sensitive and feminine side especially when it comes to arts or painting.
    I suppose some of her behaviours and attitudes( like her assertiveness and bluntness) aren’t girly-girly type so many girls could find her to be somewhat odd, though she gets along with girls much better now than before, she has told me that girls are way too dramatic and overreact too much and that boys are easier to get along with.

    I suppose some of my friends behaviour could apply to you.

  10. #10
    (blankpages) Xenon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5
    Posts
    836

    Default

    True, you aren't likely to get responses from actual ESTPs. I found a thread from last year: Female ESTPs.

    Even there, I don't think there were any actual female ESTPs posting, but there was some discussion about them and how others perceived them. So, check it out if you're curious. I assume you are.

    That said though, I don't think it's unusual for T women in general to not quite fit in with other women, or to be criticized for not behaving as women are expected to. I think it would vary a lot between different T types though. I mean, I'm quiet and laid-back, so while I'm also put off by some kinds of typical "women talk" it's usually not apparent to others. Plus, I don't really relate to typical men any better. IN types can have a hard time fitting in in general, which likely has something to do with why there are so many of us on message boards like this one.

    Anyways, below I've posted a link to an article on T women. It includes quotes from a variety of T women about their experiences: being tomboyish, being criticized for being blunt when a woman would be expected to be tactful, disinterest in "girl talk", etc.

    What's it Like to be a Thinking Woman? What's it Like to be a Feeling Man?

    Oh, it also talks about romantic relationships between T women and F men. Was it you who mentioned being married to an ISFJ guy?

Similar Threads

  1. [MBTItm] something just doesn't add up about ESTP women (the famous kind vs the irl kind)
    By bundleofsunshine in forum Popular Culture and Type
    Replies: 25
    Last Post: 06-07-2017, 04:26 AM
  2. INFJs vs Other Fe-types?
    By Ribonuke in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 05-15-2012, 07:27 AM
  3. [ESTP] ESTP women
    By Jonny in forum The SP Arthouse (ESFP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 02-10-2010, 11:10 AM
  4. Advice needed from other married/LTR women!
    By Lookin4theBestNU in forum The Fluff Zone
    Replies: 41
    Last Post: 11-17-2007, 01:58 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO