Quote Originally Posted by SolitaryWalker View Post
Some things that would be helpful for you to know about typology. A lot of posters who responded to you reasoned by this inference. Someone is this or that type, therefore it means that they have this or that personality quality or that they will perforce behave in one specified way. For example, if someone is a P, they will be disorganized or if someone is an I they will be shy. Don't pay much attention to posts of that nature.

A type is a solidified natural tendency to function in a certain way. So, if you are I, it is the most natural for you to become stimulated by passive activity that requires little interaction rather than activities demanding a high degree of interaction. So if someone is a certain type, it means their mind will tend to function in a certain way.

So, what does this mean with regard to your predicament? If someone is a Te type, their judgment most easily responds to the external world. So, it will be easy for a person to make assessments on the basis of what is to be found in the external world such as meeting conventional goals like receiving a quality job, or procuring praise from important people. Since judgment works around the external world, its also easy to take conventional steps towards acheiving the goal in question such as making simple lists, plans and relying on typical guidelines and instructions others have established.

Yet if someone's judgment is internally aimed, its much easier to look for what is satisfying to the person's inner being rather than what is conventionally valued by others. Since the judgment is also internally focused, its difficult to rely on the methods propounded by others or what is easily found in the external world. This is so as the introverted judgment leads a person to be more easily motivated by what appears to be internally appealing.

In short, the easiest way to help someone with the introverted judgment disposition is to find somethign that they could find intrinsically worthwhile. In short, for a typical person it is easy to be motivated by conventional goals that they may not enjoy or find intrinsically worthwhile, yet for an Introverted judging mindset its often very important that the goal in question is intrinsically worthwhile.

Thanks for this info- I do get confused between Ti/Te, Fi/Fe but that makes a lot of sense. I'm secondary Te, so I can see some truth in what you posted up there.

I think what bugged me the most (hopefully this is reflected in the posts) was that I wasn't getting anything from her concerning goals. It wasn't about how conventional the goals were, it was just getting a good sense that she wanted something out of life and was working to get there.

I appreciate your post.