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  1. #1
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    Default ESTP Relationships - What do ESTPs look for in romantic relationships?

    Personality-wise?

    Fire away.

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    i'm curious about this as well.

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    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    I don't think ESTPs consciously look for romantic relationships. I think they look for short-term partners and try to vary things up, and then somehow accidentally end up in a relationship they like when they stumble across the right person.

    That's what I've gathered, at least. I've often heard people I would type as ESTPs saying things like, "I don't know, it just... happened. It was like lightning."

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    Quote Originally Posted by Athenian200 View Post
    I don't think ESTPs consciously look for romantic relationships. I think they look for short-term partners and try to vary things up, and then somehow accidentally end up in a relationship they like when they stumble across the right person.

    That's what I've gathered, at least. I've often heard people I would type as ESTPs saying things like, "I don't know, it just... happened. It was like lightning."
    I agree with Athenian.

    This is exactly what my ESTP sister does. And i could imagine other ESTPs doing the same thing.

    She cannot without experience understand ANYONE. If she has a bad experience with someone she would kick them good bye. but until/unless that happens she is all friendly with them. (not in a ESFP way).

    ^ is her friends.

    When she chooses dates -
    pretty much what Athenian 200 said.

  5. #5
    Widdles in your cream.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Athenian200 View Post
    I don't think ESTPs consciously look for romantic relationships. I think they look for short-term partners and try to vary things up, and then somehow accidentally end up in a relationship they like when they stumble across the right person.

    That's what I've gathered, at least. I've often heard people I would type as ESTPs saying things like, "I don't know, it just... happened. It was like lightning."

    Perhaps this is a general TP thing? This happens to me a lot. In fact, it's happened again. I started university with a sense of, "I'm only here to learn; I have no interest in pursuing a romantic relationship for the time being". Fast forward a couple of weeks, and I'm now going out with an ISFP. I can honestly not figure out what happened. It happened in a flash.

    Hmm. Until I can put my finger on it, maybe I'll just call it "The Artisan Effect".
    Um, yeah.

  6. #6
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    Hmm okay thank you But what characteristics would make the ESTP stop and go - hang on, this girl/guy might be the one for me...!

  7. #7
    Artisan Conquerer Halla74's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Athenian200 View Post
    I don't think ESTPs consciously look for romantic relationships. I think they look for short-term partners and try to vary things up, and then somehow accidentally end up in a relationship they like when they stumble across the right person.

    That's what I've gathered, at least. I've often heard people I would type as ESTPs saying things like, "I don't know, it just... happened. It was like lightning."
    AND...

    Quote Originally Posted by Curzon View Post
    I agree with Athenian.

    This is exactly what my ESTP sister does. And i could imagine other ESTPs doing the same thing.

    She cannot without experience understand ANYONE. If she has a bad experience with someone she would kick them good bye. but until/unless that happens she is all friendly with them. (not in a ESFP way).

    ^ is her friends.

    When she chooses dates -
    pretty much what Athenian 200 said.
    You are both wrong.

    What do ESTPs look for in romantic relationships? I'd say we look for the same things that any other human being does: Love, sex, companionship, friendship, etc.

    Regarding the notion of "consciously looking for a romantic relationship", I think that sounds a little strange, if not creepy. It's one thing to love yourself and be at peace with yourself and have an open heart that is available to giving and receiving love. It's quite another to "consciously look for a romantic relationship." That sounds like stalking, and that is not very ESTP at all.

    We meet so many people due to our highly developed social skills that we probably have an easier time than most other types of finding someone that arouses all the right attraction/curiousity/feelings/interest/etc. So, if we are available, odds are we will find someone to date, and if things work out then maybe it will turn into a LTR, or marriage.

    Athenian, I never, ever in my life "looked for short term partners." I have very high standards when it comes to dating/overall attraction (physical, intellectual, spiritual, etc.) and I never cared for pursuing the life of a "player." Any girl I dated I asked her out and she had a full shot at the title. If things didn't work out that way then no harm no foul. I don't know where you get your assumptions of ESTPs.

    Over time it's become clear that you distrust them and think they are of low moral fiber. That's interesting coming from a person that said they would only call the police if they saw a person bering brutually late/assaulted so long as iti didn't make you late for work, actually only if the person being assaulted called you the day before to notify you so that you could write it into your schedule. Remeber that remark?

    http://www.typologycentral.com/forum...0-post105.html

    Who are you to judge anyone?

    I for one knew from a very early age that I wanted a wife, someone all my own, and I knew I wanted to be a father at some point in my life. I did not rush into trying to find Mrs. Hall. We met at school, and she blew my mind, and I devoted all resources to pursuing her, and things worked out, and here we are 15 years later happily married and with two beautiful kids.

    Did I shit can my ex-girlfriend from high school (4 year relationship) when she screwed our relationship up? Yup. And I did not look back. But that is not just an ESTP phenomenon, many extroverts do the same thing. When we are done, we are done.

    I'll give you the "Big 5" that I think any ESTP male would be very happy with in a LTR, marriage or not:

    1. Love/Sex
    2. Companionship
    3. Quality Time (Fun)
    4. Respect
    5. Peace and Quiet

    -Halla

  8. #8
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Halla74 View Post
    Athenian, I never, ever in my life "looked for short term partners." I have very high standards when it comes to dating/overall attraction (physical, intellectual, spiritual, etc.) and I never cared for pursuing the life of a "player." Any girl I dated I asked her out and she had a full shot at the title. If things didn't work out that way then no harm no foul. I don't know where you get your assumptions of ESTPs.
    You aren't very familiar with the archetypes and stereotypes, I see.

    I never said that people who look for short-term relationships are somehow lacking in morals. Where did you get that assumption? I know ENP friends who do the same thing, and I think they're wonderful people.

    But fine, point conceded. They weren't ESTPs.

    Quote Originally Posted by Halla74 View Post
    That's interesting coming from a person that said they would only call the police if they saw a person bering brutually late/assaulted so long as iti didn't make you late for work, actually only if the person being assaulted called you the day before to notify you so that you could write it into your schedule. Remeber that remark?

    http://www.typologycentral.com/forum...0-post105.html

    Who are you to judge anyone?
    You know, I'm getting pretty sick and tired of you dredging up the past and throwing it in my face just because you don't happen to agree with my perspective. It's such a boring way to insult someone, I would have thought an ESTP could be halfway creative and actually get to me. Look, just don't talk to me, or about me from now on, okay?

  9. #9
    Artisan Conquerer Halla74's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Athenian200 View Post
    You aren't very familiar with the archetypes and stereotypes, I see.
    Archetypes are a relevant part of theory.
    Stereotypes are constructs that ignorant people cast upon others.

    Quote Originally Posted by Athenian200 View Post
    I never said that people who look for short-term relationships are somehow lacking in morals. Where did you get that assumption? I know ENP friends who do the same thing, and I think they're wonderful people.

    But fine, point conceded. They weren't ESTPs.
    I never stated anything about morality. I simply answered the OP with details from my life that I deemed relevant.

    Quote Originally Posted by Athenian200 View Post
    You know, I'm getting pretty sick and tired of you dredging up the past and throwing it in my face just because you don't happen to agree with my perspective. It's such a boring way to insult someone, I would have thought an ESTP could be halfway creative and actually get to me. Look, just don't talk to me, or about me from now on, okay?
    You'd know if I were insulting you. You are not worth my time or effort. I just thought it amusing that someone with views as self centered as your own is comfortable preaching about the romantic inclincations of others. The point is that you can dish it out, but you can't take it. Grow up.

  10. #10
    Rainy Day Woman MDP2525's Avatar
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    People who say they are or are not looking for a relationship baffle me. How is this something you can control??? Yet I hear these phrases a lot!
    ~luck favors the ready~


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