[SP] Friends With Cuddling Benefits?

[stellar renegade]

Got any? I have one. It's pretty amazing.

She keeps cracking up over the fact that I like to smell her when she smells really good, though.

And we get asked if we're going out, but only when we don't show any affection or any other "signs", hahaha. I'm sure because when we do they just assume.

hahaha.

 

[SillySapienne]

I've had these, they're awesome!!!

In fact, I'd love to have one now!

 

[stellar renegade]

I'd so be in on that with you, if you only lived close by!

 

[ayoitsStepho]

i like cuddling and never have anyone to cuddle
so im kind of a cuddle virgin

 

[SillySapienne]

I'd so be in on that with you, if you only lived close by!

I don't know what you look like, or how old you are, but just as long as you kept your boners down, or to yourself. Yeah, I'd hypothetically be willing!

 

[OrangeAppled]

I find this gives men the wrong impression, so I don't usually go there with male friends.
Otherwise, cuddling is nice.

 

[SillySapienne]

i like cuddling and never have anyone to cuddle
so im kind of a cuddle virgin

Oh man, that suximus maximus!

:sad:

Cuddling for the ultimate epic win!!!!!

I also cuddle with girls.

 

[sunshinebrighter]

I love to cuddle!!!!! But that love have given me trouble in the past. Been called a whore. My affections have been misinterpreted to others that I'm interested in them.

Gotta be careful in the future.

 

[Spamtar]

Don't do it! Its called being a "cuddle bitch". Its fun at the beginning but it will soon give you blue balls from hell. The women who lead you on this way are heartless ninjas.

 

[SillySapienne]

I love to cuddle!!!!! But that love have given me trouble in the past. Been called a whore. My affections have been misinterpreted to others that I'm interested in them.

Gotta be careful in the future.

Fuck any pissant who calls you a whore.

The fact that you appreciate physical affection does not make you a whore, it makes you human!!!

God, I hate people, sometimes!!!!

 

[SillySapienne]

Don't do it. Its called being a "cuddle bitch". Its fun at the beginning but it will soon give you blue balls from hell. The women who lead you on this way are heartless ningas.

PLEASE TELL ME YOU ARE JOKING!!!!

 

[Alwar]

I've had two of these. One was completely addicted to cuddling and insisted constantly that I hold her. The other led to a relationship.

 

[Alwar]

Don't do it! Its called being a "cuddle bitch".

Interesting theory, this seems related to the "emotional tampon" hypothesis.

 

[Spamtar]

PLEASE TELL ME YOU ARE JOKING!!!!

Nuh uh only when you are on XTC or mushrooms. I was recently a "cuddle bitch" myself and had to cut off the girl cold until she called and I could tell her buying tempature was high enough to let her come over for sex. It was a close call at losing a FWB forever. See below:

"Cuddle Bitches
cuddle bitch - a guy who never gets to sleep with a girl but gets to have intimate moments with her like cuddling, spooning, or otherwise being affectionate. Usually this will occur in private. She probably considers him a really sweet guy, which is the kiss of death.

First off, cuddle bitches are bad, bad things to be. Maybe the worst thing to be. I mean, being an Intellectual Whore is bad, but being an Intellectual Whore who has to endure blue-balls is bordering on criminal.

As to how it fits into the framework of the ladder.

Basically this is just a guy who has a very high position on the friends ladder. So far up the friends ladder that he gets the dubious honor of getting to provide all the intimacy that a girl is missing when she's off fucking guys who basically don't care about her like outlaw bikers and band members. So he gets to be the proxy father/confessor/friend/teddy bear for her, depending on what she is missing at the time. Perhaps the only consolation of this is a ladder jump to the real ladder seems statistically a little more likely to succeed. Of course, when one is that high up the fall is dreadful indeed...


How do we know this? Well, if a woman had a nice loving boyfriend then he would be doing all the cuddling and whatnot and likely wouldn't stand for a woman maintaining a stable of cuddle bitches. Unless he's completelty pussified, in which case she's likely fucking some other people anyway.

For guys unacquainted with Ladder Theory, it is even worse. The cuddle bitch often thinks he is on the good ladder as opposed to the real ladder. So he gets all excited about his position instead of realizing he is being completely used. So this poor tool is really setting himself up for a fall at that point.

Note: This does not apply if cuddling under the influence of mushrooms, for the express purposes of avoiding hypothermia, or if the woman is a whore that you've recently paid for sex. Cuddling is perfectly acceptable and probably non-sexual in these circumstances."

 

[SillySapienne]

Oy Vey!

 

[Alwar]

According to neurobiologist Louann Brizendine, cuddling releases oxytocin and endorphins in the female brain. To end the cycle just replace cuddles with chocolate, which have the same effect.

 

[ayoitsStepho]

but i want to cuddle....
screw chocolate.

 

[ergophobe]

Good in theory, bad in practice. I don't like confusing relationships...

 

[OrangeAppled]

Quoting the ladder theory automatically puts you on the friend ladder. Scratch that - it puts you on the creep ladder.

According to neurobiologist Louann Brizendine, cuddling releases oxytocin and endorphins in the female brain. To end the cycle just replace cuddles with chocolate, which have the same effect.

But cuddling doesn't make you fat.

 

[Alwar]

I made the last part up. It was either chocolate or some cheesy shoe store comment. There is no way to thwart cuddle requests from the human female. There are techniques to get around it but I am obligated by manlaw not to reveal the knowledge of the brotherhood in public.