[SP] Friends With Cuddling Benefits?

[BlackCat]

I would suspect that blue balls would be unbearable.

My thoughts. I'd get really annoyed and sexually frustrated.

Friends with benefits AND cuddling.

 

[Spamtar]

Cuddling is fine. Its kinda like kissing. After kissing for so many minutes its either time to stop kissing or move onto the next base. Cuddling after so many minutes (absent both partners having cuddle fetishes] makes appropriate the choice to move onto kiss/heavy petting/foreplay or stop or go to sleep. With me, it is all the individuals choice to do what they want as long as it is between consenting adults. Yet consider calibrating your partner and make sure that they are on a similar wavelength of what is pleasurable.

Spamtar

 

[Bamboo]

Got any? I have one. It's pretty amazing.

She keeps cracking up over the fact that I like to smell her when she smells really good, though.

And we get asked if we're going out, but only when we don't show any affection or any other "signs", hahaha. I'm sure because when we do they just assume.

hahaha.

...well, while everyone else is off on some "super serious discussion about relationship dynamics"... yes. (I only skimmed the posts in this topic).

And seriously, exactly like how you described it. I can't stop smelling her hair...it's awesome.

But...I do want to jump her on occasion. She kinda goes for it and then shuts me down and we end up wrestling. It's still fun though. Circumstances don't permit us to hook up so it's all good. Really, it's pretty enjoyable.

 

[Giggly]

Cuddling benefits! Funny term. Heck yeah I love to cuddle! But I wouldn't initiate it with anyone other than a guy I'm dating or close family members.

 

[King sns]

I LOOVVEE cuddling... Its my favorite thing to do...

have had a couple of cuddle buddies in the past.. they were gay males.

 

[LEGERdeMAIN]

I stopped reading the responses after I could tell the thread was going in a certain direction, but I could be wrong cause I stopped reading.

For those women arguing that they should be able to have non-sexual affection with a man who they are not in a relationship with and the guy shouldn't reasonably expect anything more (SEX) I really find that to be a incredulously naive POV. I think your best bet is to buy a teddy bear.

Women get more benefits from cuddling (everything from lessening depression to strengthening the heart) than men do, actually it does very little for them. I'm not denying a woman's greater need for non-sexual affection, I just think realistically if you're cuddling up with someone who's not your SO and it's a guy he's going to expect some pony up after awhile because he is being used in a way.

As CaptainChick so eloquently brought up, does cuddling with other women produce the same effect or is it specifically guys?

I can "cuddle" with girls who I don't have any sexual interest in. I'm not really in to cuddling for the sake of cuddling though. It leads to boredom and sleeping.

 

[Cheetah]

*smacks NT brethren*

Jackasses =p

 

[Giggly]

I, personally, do not cuddle with my friends. We may have a hug, as in a short embrace then release, or a kiss on the cheek, but not cuddling. Cuddling is a bit more intimate to me. The only exception I can think of is if we're outside and it's freezing cold, but then that's more like a huddle, as opposed to a cuddle.

 

[wolfy]

Cuddling with friends is for when you're going to die from exposure.

 

[Giggly]

Cuddling with friends is for when you're going to die from exposure.

Ahaha yeah.

 

[LEGERdeMAIN]

This thread is teeming with cuddlephobics.

 

[Giggly]

To the guys who cuddle with girls you have no sexual interest in: what if she has sexual interest in you? Would you still cuddle with her then?

 

[AphroditeGoneAwry]

My feeling is that when women want to cuddle it's because they need to feel cared for and loved and accepted as an individual. When men want to cuddle, it's cuz they are hoping sex will result, although if they are a nice guy, they'll accept the cuddle sans sex. Isn't this obvious?

I also have seen that women who want to cuddle tend to be people I consider a bit more how shall I say, er, a bit more cognizant of her own needs versus the needs of others. Not that the cuddle type isn't interested in helping others, because she is, but she's a bit more interested in having her own intimacy needs met first. I think what I'm saying is the type of woman who wants to cuddle and will cuddle with platonic expectations (flirting at the most), is someone with low/lower Fe. She is not necessarily thinking of the other person and how he is feeling, but more about herself and how good it feels to be embraced.

Having said that, I will cuddle my girlfriends. Sometimes I even hold hands with my best friends (rarely). Usually I cuddle my xsfp (esfp i think) friend because she is so needy in this way, she's practically begging for affection, not unlike a puppy dog. Although it makes me slightly uncomfortable I do it because I love her and care for her.

I cuddled with a good guy friend from high school years ago (in high school). I suspected he had sexual feelings for me. I didn't for him. After the one time, I discontinued the cuddle because I didn't want to lead him on.

 

[Lauren Ashley]

Haven't read this thread yet, but to the OP....

...I'm so not down with this! Now I love physical touch, I love cuddling, I love that physical closeness with another...but I 100% associate this with someone I'm romantically interested in. It's totally, irrevocably connected. I touch/cuddle *because* I have feelings for someone and am involved with them. It's an extension of my feelings.

Same. I have many male friends, but under no circumstances would I cuddle with them. I reserve cuddling for significant others or those I'm interested in romantically. Cuddling male friends would only confuse them into thinking that I want more from them than friendship. Besides that, I don't get any comfort from cuddling unless it is someone I am interested in romantically.

 

[LEGERdeMAIN]

To the guys who cuddle with girls you have no sexual interest in: what if she has sexual interest in you? Would you still cuddle with her then?

no. thats weird.

 

[swordpath]

I, personally, do not cuddle with my friends. We may have a hug, as in a short embrace then release, or a kiss on the cheek, but not cuddling. Cuddling is a bit more intimate to me. The only exception I can think of is if we're outside and it's freezing cold, but then that's more like a huddle, as opposed to a cuddle.

+1

Cuddling with strictly platonic friends? Hell naw.

I've shared my opinion on cuddling before. I view it as a fairly intimate exchange, on par with sex.

 

[Giggly]

I've shared my opinion on cuddling before. I view it as a fairly intimate exchange, on par with sex.

Yeah, definitely, me too.

(Although cuddling and sex are not replacements for each other, imo)

 

[swordpath]

(Although cuddling and sex are not replacements for each other, imo)

No doubt.

 

[Nyx]

I hate cuddling...unless I'm extremely attracted to someone or in love with the person. In that case I love cuddling.

I just do not understand my friends who cuddle with each other casually.

 

[Athenian200]

That's kind of sweet, actually.

It might not be the smartest choice considering all the potential implications, but I can see the value in it.

And speaking of which... why is it that women sometimes cuddle with each other or otherwise touch, but it's rare for men who aren't gay to do the same? Is it the whole sex drive thing? Homophobia?