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  1. #1
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    Default SPs, do you forget...

    In my personal experience, I have noticed that most of the ESTPs I know, over the course of their life, seem to have so many friends and ex-girl/boyfriends....

    My question is: do you forget your exs- as soon as you move on?

    This question is not about how quickly you move on.. BUT about which ones remain in your memory for a long time and why?

    Are there some particular ex's you (will) always have a flame for (or pine for) and why (e.g. is it because of a great physical connection)?

    Views and experiences from other SPs are very welcome... I would really appreciate some understanding here

  2. #2
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    Great question. Aside from them being extroverted and needing to extrovert, I think it's because they're very open-minded and open to possibilities. They think there is always something to learn from others or activities that they can do with others, if these things happen to come up. In the case of ESFPs, they think there is always emotions that can be shared with others and activities that they can do with others, if those happen come up.

  3. #3
    Artisan Conquerer Halla74's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blackprince View Post
    My question is: do you forget your exs- as soon as you move on?
    Forget = NO; If parting was non-destructive, certainly not. If parting was treacherous, then Forget = FOREVER. I'm capable of remaining friends with ex's once some water has flowed under the bridge. That's a sign of maturity if done the right way for the right reasons.

    Quote Originally Posted by Blackprince View Post
    This question is not about how quickly you move on.. BUT about which ones remain in your memory for a long time and why?
    Se above...

    Quote Originally Posted by Blackprince View Post
    Are there some particular ex's you (will) always have a flame for (or pine for) and why (e.g. is it because of a great physical connection)?
    If you're pining for someone you had better be with them, die trying to be, or do whatever is necessary to stay with them. If you pine for someone and you are with someone, that's a bad sign, IMHO.


  4. #4
    PEST that STEPs on PETS stellar renegade's Avatar
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    I tend to forget about them for the most part once I've moved on from the relationship/crush. If the break-up seems to have come at a good stopping-place then there's generally no reason to look back. If I'm pining for someone I usually aggressively hunt them down or try to come up with some way to get with them; if it's unrequited I might be upset for a bit but I've learned to shut that off as soon as possible and move on. And yes, I usually forget about them after that just like I do with most people I'm not around very much.

    Quote Originally Posted by Halla74 View Post
    If you're pining for someone you had better be with them, die trying to be, or do whatever is necessary to stay with them. If you pine for someone and you are with someone, that's a bad sign, IMHO.

    AMEN, BROTHA!!!

    If you're pining, you'd better be prepared to cross a thousand oceans for them. If not, forget about it, and if doing all that for them doesn't attract them, then forget about them. It's time to move on.
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  5. #5
    ..... Intricate Mystic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Halla74 View Post
    If you're pining for someone you had better be with them, die trying to be, or do whatever is necessary to stay with them. If you pine for someone and you are with someone, that's a bad sign, IMHO.

    Quote Originally Posted by stellar renegade View Post
    If you're pining, you'd better be prepared to cross a thousand oceans for them. If not, forget about it, and if doing all that for them doesn't attract them, then forget about them. It's time to move on.
    This is some of the best advice I've ever seen at Typec. Thank you!

  6. #6
    veteran attention whore Jeffster's Avatar
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    No, of course I don't forget. I think you'd have to have some sort of brain damage to forget someone you have an actual relationship with.
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    PEST that STEPs on PETS stellar renegade's Avatar
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    Are we defining forgetting as not being able to remember or just not thinking about them for the most part?
    -stellar renegade
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  8. #8
    Junior Member Captain's Avatar
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    I don't forget anyone who I really liked, regardless of how the relationship ended.
    "We demand... ANOTHER SHRUBBERY!" ~The Knights Who Say Ni

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  9. #9
    Senior Member mcmartinez84's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jeffster View Post
    No, of course I don't forget. I think you'd have to have some sort of brain damage to forget someone you have an actual relationship with.
    Yep.

    Quote Originally Posted by stellar renegade View Post
    Are we defining forgetting as not being able to remember or just not thinking about them for the most part?
    If it's not thinking about them, then yeah, I forget. I'm very "out of sight, out of mind"...
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  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by stellar renegade View Post
    Are we defining forgetting as not being able to remember or just not thinking about them for the most part?
    Thanks for the answers, guys.

    I'm defining 'forget' in terms of... the way you forget say bout your primary school... So for me, I was once in primary school, but that was way back and I have no desire to revisit those memories.. for good or bad.... its water under the bridge.

    This is as opposed to say, the way some people remember their university days... you definitely acknowledge you have moved on, but you can remember those days fondly... how young you were, the crazy things.... and occassionally 'pine' for those 'good old days' as they say.

    If this helps, this explains what I mean by pining - of course, realistically you cant go back to uni.

    For context, I ask because I know two ESTPs (100% STPs) very well... and although, both have moved on to other people, they both seem to have a hot-cold r'ship with one particular ex- of their's that they had a long r'ship with (no terrible break-up involved; just a move on). So I am trying to understand this hot-cold r'ship (by this I mean, they talk to them occassionally, but by and large, they seem to consider or act like these people are 'risky' to remain in contact with....)

    So I am trying to understand wht they might be thinking....

    In summary, ruling out a nasty break up, when is an ex- a risky proposition to stay in contact with?

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