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[SP] ISFP- or other SPs, if they apply

IZthe411

Carerra Lu
Joined
Jul 19, 2009
Messages
2,585
MBTI Type
INTJ
I've read in a few descriptions that ISFPs (and maybe other SPs) won't express their feelings, or don't like to, yet they get angry when they aren't getting what they want. Do you find this to be true?

My girlfriend is like this- Like anything, in order for something to click, you can't expect to have to say something once and expect to move a mountain. She thinks by implying things (like "I want to see you" automatically means "I miss you") that she doesn't have to say anything more.

I ask because as an ISTJ, feelings aren't first on my radar, and for best results, I expect for you to say what you mean.

What gives?
Help a brotha out.

Thanks.
 

wolfy

awsm
Joined
Jun 30, 2008
Messages
12,251
You expect her to say what she means but she expects you to pay attention and read between the lines. People who do that almost always use the same cues so if you pay attention long enough you can build a database of them all. Don't ask her whether you're right, just give her what you think she wants and see what happens.

That's all I've got.
 

IZthe411

Carerra Lu
Joined
Jul 19, 2009
Messages
2,585
MBTI Type
INTJ
You expect her to say what she means but she expects you to pay attention and read between the lines. People who do that almost always use the same cues so if you pay attention long enough you can build a database of them all. Don't ask her whether you're right, just give her what you think she wants and see what happens.
That's all I've got.

Yeah that's the part I don't want to deal with. You've heard what happens when you make assumptions? It makes one out of you and me!!!!
 

wolfy

awsm
Joined
Jun 30, 2008
Messages
12,251
Yeah that's the part I don't want to deal with. You've heard what happens when you make assumptions? It makes one out of you and me!!!!

Sometimes. But if you pull it off you're the man.
 

Maxwell22290

New member
Joined
Jun 27, 2009
Messages
52
MBTI Type
ISFP
The way I see it, "I want to see you." and "I miss you." are pretty much interchangable sentences. As for the sharing feelings thing, it is really hard. Or atleast it takes a long time. I guess I could say that I treat others kind of like children. As a kid gets older you give them more and more responsibility and if they screw up you take away privileges. If I get to know you and trust you, I'll let you into my world a bit, and if you respond well, it will continue on. If you don't, I'll draw back. It's a slow process. If you try to pick up on the little clues and respond to them she'll probably feel more comfortable and you'll be able to draw her out and get her to share her feelings and wants and whatnot more. Hope that helps/makes sense.
 

IZthe411

Carerra Lu
Joined
Jul 19, 2009
Messages
2,585
MBTI Type
INTJ
The way I see it, "I want to see you." and "I miss you." are pretty much interchangable sentences. As for the sharing feelings thing, it is really hard. Or atleast it takes a long time. I guess I could say that I treat others kind of like children. As a kid gets older you give them more and more responsibility and if they screw up you take away privileges. If I get to know you and trust you, I'll let you into my world a bit, and if you respond well, it will continue on. If you don't, I'll draw back. It's a slow process. If you try to pick up on the little clues and respond to them she'll probably feel more comfortable and you'll be able to draw her out and get her to share her feelings and wants and whatnot more. Hope that helps/makes sense.


Thanks. Part of me hears what you are saying, the other part is saying, there's no way a person can function like this.
 

stellar renegade

PEST that STEPs on PETS
Joined
Jul 13, 2009
Messages
1,446
MBTI Type
ESTP
You find that much of a difference between "I want to see you" and "I miss you"? How can someone want to see you without missing you? I don't get it.
 

syckkz

New member
Joined
Jul 26, 2009
Messages
135
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
5w6
Sometimes putting feelings out there isn't the easiest thing to some people.. might want to ask her to be more clear with you so you know what's going on.

I def. relate on getting upset about things.. but not being clear enough for my partner to even know what happened. Kind of hard to break habit.. but let her know so maybe she can try
 
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