I give everybody the benefit of the doubt. But if I'm going to make myself vulnerable to another, I start asking reasonable questions and observing, just as reassurance to myself. The more doubt I have, the more questions I ask, and the more holes I find in their story or personality, the less I trust them.
+ 1,000,000. I just had a whole bunch of "aha!" moments when I read that. That explains so much of why I distrust and/or dislike certain people, I've just never been able to put it into words. Inconsistencies in behavior makes me extremely suspicious.
When I glanced over this I thought it read: "ISTPs: Too Sensative?
ISTPs really are intensive, I like it.
Is it that by its indefiniteness it shadows forth the heartless voids and immensities of the universe, and thus stabs us from behind with the thought of annihilation, when beholding the white depths of the milky way?
I've been reading this thread on and off, and for the most part my reaction is "what the hell are these people babbling on about anyway?" but I'll add this chunk of semi-organized whatsit.
Notes on impressions...with semi related content along the way.
I bought a used car a while back and chose to buy a particular one based off a 1) a cursory inspection and 2) looking at the guy I was buying it from and asking myself if he was trustworthy.
He was a dealer from out of state who showed me the car in an apartment parking lot (not a dealership) and had me pick up the car later by removing the tags and throwing them over his fence. The paperwork was out of state and seemed odd. Needless to say, this seemed sketchy.
But he seemed honest, so I risked a large sum of money on my impression that he was honest. Worked out just fine.
I needed some bolts for my new muffler so after work I dropped into a hardware store I had never been to (today). The guy helps me pick out bolts and rings me up for 15 bucks. (Merchandise price not labeled.) That strikes me as high, and even though the guy seems honest, I can't help but think, is he screwing with me?
I know I can get them cheaper at my regular store so I head over there. I'm at checkout and there is a girl working at an adjacent register. She makes eye contact and smiles. I return and pay attention to the credit card machine. She then turns, faces me, and continues to make eye contact and gives me this smile. I say nothing, look back, smile etc. and then get on with my business and head out. Normally I'm not good with understanding flirting that consists of distracting chatter, but reading body language in isolation generally makes sense to me.
My muffler installed just fine (car runs better even), but I think I need some tools...or parts...or something....uh...
Anyway, moral of the story, most of the time I read people and trust what I see.
I'm willing to take risks based off of my impressions/"reads".
Sometimes I can't help but think things that I know don't make sense or are not true.
Also, I generally find those gaps in conversations where people STFU and are just doing whatever to be more revealing about how they relate to you/how they feel than most of the content of conversation (case dependent).
I think it's both... I do feel it comes natural to me, but I'm very interested all at the same time. Observing people and situations is just more data I can add to my ever growing people database :P. But yeah... I can relate to your husband. I do try to give people a chance though. I'm not opposed to being proven wrong (although it took a while to get there ). My ENFP sister and ESFJ mother both try to bring me around when they have new guys in their life. My sister calls it the "ISTP sister screening." I think guys she dates gets very confused when they're going for an ENFP girl and she brings her VERY different ISTP sister around (I think they suspect I'd be like her and since they already know her, they think they know how to gain my favor)... because 9 times out of 10 they all of a sudden act like idiots to try to get my approval. And I'm just sitting and watching quietly (I might be exuding a "Don't-you-dare-think-you-can-take-advantage-of-my-sister-while-I'm-around" aura ...). I guess that could be an example of when people get intimidated by me? In the instances these guys act like complete idiots, I'm not really willing to give them a second chance though... My sister has a tendency to give everyone chances (She's pretty set on settling down now.. or has been since 18 I think. She's 27 now), and I guess I try to balance it out by helping her rule out people more. Why waste your time on morons when there's someone better for you, eh?
Ok, I do think its the data collecting activity that ISTP's do with people when concentrating on them, and it's very realistic. My data collection is more like what that person could be not what s/he actually is. With ISTP's, I think, it's more seeing what they really are.
My husband is (by the way) not interested with romantic relationships of other people, I think.
Hehe, that "Don't-dare..." thing souds familiar. It's pretty interesting that a person can have such a strong impact on people just being quiet. I mean, wtf, I cannot do it (I don't know how to be quiet nor impress anybody quietly, lol). It's also part of than intesity that I sense in ISTP's. Strong presence without saying a word without being in the center of attention. But I've noticed that ISTP's can also be on the background if they want without being noticed but they can also be on the background and really be noticed. I don't understand it but it's facinating feature.
I'd have to agree with this... Sometimes (with people I know well) I -suspect- how they might feel, but it's hit or miss... so I usually wait till I either get more clues or they just flat out tell me.
I don't know how relevant this is or if other ISTPs can relate, but I'm fairly accurate at sensing when people are physically/romantically interested in each other. I find it amusing watching sparks fly between two people. It's like the Discovery Channel. However... I can be somewhat oblivious when people are interested in me. I guess I like to give people the benefit of the doubt? I'd feel silly suspecting someone was interested in me when they weren't. Not sure why. For future reference: If you're interested in an ISTP, just flat out tell them. I hate trying to guess stuff like that.
Yeah I defiantly relate, a lot of people might even think I'm asexual because of doing this
I never really know when people are interested in me unless they do something really obvious like tell me
I was mad that you referred to the comments in this thread as babbling. It hurt my feelings. I should have just said that in the first place, though, since you guys seem to like people being direct. *sigh*