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  1. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by Intricate Mystic View Post
    What if the person you were making eye contact was someone you had met only recently, but their eyes were clearing saying "I love everything about you, mind, body, and soul"? Would you still say that it isn't really important?
    How do the eyes clearly say anything?

    I can tell a lot about a person from their eyes, but the way I perceive it is in the form of energy.

    Considering only eye contact, nothing is ever clear to me about what a person is thinking or feeling. I only get a good general idea whether their internal state is positive or negative. But that feeling may have nothing to do with me, it could have to do with how content they are with themselves, with the current situation, anything!

    So, especially someone I do not know very well, I would never perceive positive internal energy as "Omg I love you." At best, it would indicate that the person is comfortable around me, but that doesn't mean a lot as I can be comfortable and happy with everyone but it doesn't imply romantic interest.

    I am the worst at guess-what-I-am-thinking/feeling games. So far the women in my life have had to be fairly straight-forward for me to understand their intentions and desires.

  2. #52
    Artisan Conquerer Halla74's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phoenity View Post
    How do the eyes clearly say anything?

    I can tell a lot about a person from their eyes, but the way I perceive it is in the form of energy.

    Considering only eye contact, nothing is ever clear to me about what a person is thinking or feeling. I only get a good general idea whether their internal state is positive or negative.
    The eyes can tell you if someone is passive Vs. assertive, happy Vs. sad (but not about what, as you said), and in some cases I think even good Vs. evil. I can tell alot about a person by their eye's contents, and by the presence/absence of eye contact.

    Regarding being "intense", in general, I have called that time and again in my life, and I am ESTP, and it is usually because I am continually operating, thinking, talking, and solving puzzles in real time. For an ISTP, I think they have that same intensity, but they will execute it in a more reserved manner, so that in their eyes, you know they have ALOT going on as to what's happening around them, and that they are waiting for the right time to act upon it, which I think is intense, as it is a demonstration of controlling one's will. Just my .02.

  3. #53
    ..... Intricate Mystic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kingfisher View Post
    assuming i was single, i would be very intrigued. it wouldn't melt my heart, but i would definitely go out of my way to spend time together, and learn more about that person. if i was at all interested in the person, i would take that as an obvious sign to really actively pursue them romantically.

    those kind of nonverbal clues are actually exactly what i look for to decide if someone is interested in me, more so than converstional cues.
    Thank you for this wonderful answer!


    Quote Originally Posted by phoenity View Post
    How do the eyes clearly say anything?
    I suppose that you can't be 100% sure what emotion you are seeing in someone's eyes. However, if someone loves you and is "in love" with you, their eyes look a certain way when they are gazing at you. I'll bet you have seen this at some point.

    I am the worst at guess-what-I-am-thinking/feeling games. So far the women in my life have had to be fairly straight-forward for me to understand their intentions and desires.
    The scenario I described isn't about thinking/feeling games- it's more about seeing someone's honest expression of emotion in their eyes. With your strong observational skills, surely you have noticed how people's facial expressions change with different emotional states, including how they look at you?

  4. #54
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    What Kingfisher is trying to say is that he has no eyes. I'm sure Gilbert would have told us about that if he'd had more time to type.
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  5. #55
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    Quote Originally Posted by Intricate Mystic View Post
    Thank you for this wonderful answer!




    I suppose that you can't be 100% sure what emotion you are seeing in someone's eyes. However, if someone loves you and is "in love" with you, their eyes look a certain way when they are gazing at you. I'll bet you have seen this at some point.



    The scenario I described isn't about thinking/feeling games- it's more about seeing someone's honest expression of emotion in their eyes. With your strong observational skills, surely you have noticed how people's facial expressions change with different emotional states, including how they look at you?
    Right. But that implies that I am intuitive as to another's emotions, what those emotions are and where they come from.

    My perceptions of another's emotional state is based on sensing whatever is available from the exterior. Thus, I get a very general sense of their emotional state, either positive or negative, but I don't intuit further as to what those emotions are, or what they concern.

    In other words, if you wear it on your face, I can tell if you feel good or bad. But if you're trying to say "I love you" with your eyes, I'm clueless, especially if I don't know you well.

  6. #56
    Controlled Mischief StephMC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phoenity View Post
    Right. But that implies that I am intuitive as to another's emotions, what those emotions are and where they come from.

    My perceptions of another's emotional state is based on sensing whatever is available from the exterior. Thus, I get a very general sense of their emotional state, either positive or negative, but I don't intuit further as to what those emotions are, or what they concern.

    In other words, if you wear it on your face, I can tell if you feel good or bad. But if you're trying to say "I love you" with your eyes, I'm clueless, especially if I don't know you well.
    I'd have to agree with this... Sometimes (with people I know well) I -suspect- how they might feel, but it's hit or miss... so I usually wait till I either get more clues or they just flat out tell me.

    I don't know how relevant this is or if other ISTPs can relate, but I'm fairly accurate at sensing when people are physically/romantically interested in each other. I find it amusing watching sparks fly between two people. It's like the Discovery Channel. However... I can be somewhat oblivious when people are interested in me. I guess I like to give people the benefit of the doubt? I'd feel silly suspecting someone was interested in me when they weren't. Not sure why. For future reference: If you're interested in an ISTP, just flat out tell them. I hate trying to guess stuff like that.

  7. #57
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    Quote Originally Posted by phoenity View Post
    Right. But that implies that I am intuitive as to another's emotions, what those emotions are and where they come from.

    My perceptions of another's emotional state is based on sensing whatever is available from the exterior. Thus, I get a very general sense of their emotional state, either positive or negative, but I don't intuit further as to what those emotions are, or what they concern.

    In other words, if you wear it on your face, I can tell if you feel good or bad. But if you're trying to say "I love you" with your eyes, I'm clueless, especially if I don't know you well.
    If you only have the ability to get a general sense of someone's emotional state, and are thus dependent on them actually telling you in a very straightforward way that they have feelings for you, I would think that you could potentially be manipulated by women, because you aren't able to verify that they are being truthful by matching up their words with their facial expressions and body language.

  8. #58
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    Quote Originally Posted by Intricate Mystic View Post
    If you only have the ability to get a general sense of someone's emotional state, and are thus dependent on them actually telling you in a very straightforward way that they have feelings for you, I would think that you could potentially be manipulated by women, because you aren't able to verify that they are being truthful by matching up their words with their facial expressions and body language.
    I think we've got off track here now. You started talking about perception of an emotional state by eye contact and body language only of someone I had recently met, thus do not know well and likely do not spend much time with, so that's what I was discussing.

    Of course the addition of verbal language, and most importantly actions, especially over time, would reveal more about a person's true feelings.

    But that requires me to spend more time with this person. So if there was someone who does feel this way about me that I don't spend a lot of time with, I have no way of knowing unless they tell me or give me some sort of clue!

  9. #59
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    Quote Originally Posted by phoenity View Post
    I think we've got off track here now. You started talking about perception of an emotional state by eye contact and body language only of someone I had recently met, thus do not know well and likely do not spend much time with, so that's what I was discussing.

    Of course the addition of verbal language, and most importantly actions, especially over time, would reveal more about a person's true feelings.

    But that requires me to spend more time with this person. So if there was someone who does feel this way about me that I don't spend a lot of time with, I have no way of knowing unless they tell me or give me some sort of clue!
    Ah, so if a woman you had just met looked at you in an awestruck manner, with adoration in her eyes, you would only pick up on a "positive internal energy", and nothing more. That would be kind of sad- all that awestruck-ness and adoration going to waste.

  10. #60
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    Quote Originally Posted by Intricate Mystic View Post
    Ah, so if a woman you had just met looked at you in an awestruck manner, with adoration in her eyes, you would only pick up on a "positive internal energy", and nothing more. That would be kind of sad- all that awestruck-ness and adoration going to waste.
    Sorry - I was looking a bit too much into this what-if.

    Realistically, if the attraction was mutual, something might happen. I don't know exactly what awestruckness and adoration looks like, but strong eye contact and an overall warm atmosphere during our friendly, casual interaction would make me very interested. You know, sparks we can both feel. How would I go about it? Who knows - it depends entirely on the situation.

    I am not the guy who would pursue a woman that seemed to show no interest in me, like averting her eyes when I looked at her, or just ignoring me completely, thinking that if I was truly interested I would be the one doing all the work.


    But past the initial flirting, I do have a difficult time understanding how another person feels or what they want from me unless they are reasonably clear about it. The times that I have misinterpreted the way a woman felt about me, I've been let down and hurt.

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