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[MBTI General] ISTP ESTJ

jixmixfix

Permabanned
Joined
Jun 21, 2009
Messages
4,278
good match? anyone know any ESTJs? I think I know one...are they usually loud and confident?
 

Unique

New member
Joined
Oct 14, 2008
Messages
1,702
You will be similar and yet you will go about things in a completely different way to each other, it may be a little detached but to answer your question yes they are usually confident
 

WickedQueen

New member
Joined
Jun 11, 2009
Messages
183
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
3w4
Hi... You both have S and T. I think it's good though...
 

StephMC

Controlled Mischief
Joined
Mar 2, 2009
Messages
1,044
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I'm dating an ESTJ right now... We get along great. We're very like-minded, but there's just enough differences that it keeps things interesting. Arguments between us are few and far between, and if there is, we hear each other out, and can handle it rationally (one of the few people I've been able to do this with), so they're short lived.

I've heard a few things about this relationship type... one that I feel is especially true is "What one partner considers solid and final appears incomplete and changeable for the other partner." It never usually results in a huge argument, we just keep putting it off thinking eventually we'll change the other's mind... but of course that's not likely going to happen. So it gets a little exhausting in that aspect. Other than that, I really enjoy our interaction. I've always been attracted to people different than me, and he is -very- different than me... I just didn't know I could find someone so different but be so like-minded and understand me at the same time! Granted, we don't always get why we do the things we do, but we're both so logical that we can communicate why to each other.

Example:
Me: "Why in the world do you go to the gym in your normal clothes and bring a bag of your gym clothes when you're just going to change into them there? Why don't you just go in your gym clothes?" [Trying to make sense of why you would prolong something as awful as running on a treadmill.]
Him: "Well, I usually go right after work."
Me: "But you're not going right after work now."
Him: "Okay, well today may just be a habit. But I like to have a change of clothes because usually I go swimming after I run and I don't want to get back into sweaty gym clothes."
Me: "Okay. That makes more sense."

One thing it's good to communicate to your ESTJ partner that most of the time, your questions are merely curiosity. You don't really mean to sound critical or like you're planning to do anything with the answer (like questions about ex's... I like those questions because it helps me understand -him- more not because I give two shits about his ex) ... 'cause 9 times out of 10, that isn't the case for me. I'm just curious! And for him, I know there's a -lot- that he doesn't get about me... but he tries his damndest to understand, and I try my damndest to explain it to him.

And how old is your ESTJ? Mine is 31... (he's a bit older than me). I think they may be loud and confident when younger, but when they get nearer to 30 they balance out a bit. My ESTJ often admits he used to be argumentative, etc. If she is younger, you can get past that pretty easily I think. Just explain where your coming from, and they'll usually hear you out. If there's one thing I can say about ESTJs, they want to take care of you and make you happy. If you tell them what you want and don't want, they'll definitely take it to heart.
 

phoenity

New member
Joined
Feb 27, 2008
Messages
472
Example:
Me: "Why in the world do you go to the gym in your normal clothes and bring a bag of your gym clothes when you're just going to change into them there? Why don't you just go in your gym clothes?" [Trying to make sense of why you would prolong something as awful as running on a treadmill.]
Him: "Well, I usually go right after work."
Me: "But you're not going right after work now."
Him: "Okay, well today may just be a habit. But I like to have a change of clothes because usually I go swimming after I run and I don't want to get back into sweaty gym clothes."
Me: "Okay. That makes more sense."

Would you prefer to hang around in sweaty workout clothes if you had showers available to use right after you finish your workout?
 

rhinosaur

Just a statistic
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
1,464
MBTI Type
INTP
I wouldn't want to date any of the ESTJs I know. They can be good to work with, though.
 

ChocolateMoose123

New member
Joined
Oct 4, 2008
Messages
5,278
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I know I'm not an ISTP, but since ISTP and INTP are both Introverted Thinkers...I'll take a step out there. I was involved in a relationship with an ESTJ for about a year. No real problems. We are still very good friends. I'd say go for it.
 

jixmixfix

Permabanned
Joined
Jun 21, 2009
Messages
4,278
I'm dating an ESTJ right now... We get along great. We're very like-minded, but there's just enough differences that it keeps things interesting. Arguments between us are few and far between, and if there is, we hear each other out, and can handle it rationally (one of the few people I've been able to do this with), so they're short lived.

I've heard a few things about this relationship type... one that I feel is especially true is "What one partner considers solid and final appears incomplete and changeable for the other partner." It never usually results in a huge argument, we just keep putting it off thinking eventually we'll change the other's mind... but of course that's not likely going to happen. So it gets a little exhausting in that aspect. Other than that, I really enjoy our interaction. I've always been attracted to people different than me, and he is -very- different than me... I just didn't know I could find someone so different but be so like-minded and understand me at the same time! Granted, we don't always get why we do the things we do, but we're both so logical that we can communicate why to each other.

Example:
Me: "Why in the world do you go to the gym in your normal clothes and bring a bag of your gym clothes when you're just going to change into them there? Why don't you just go in your gym clothes?" [Trying to make sense of why you would prolong something as awful as running on a treadmill.]
Him: "Well, I usually go right after work."
Me: "But you're not going right after work now."
Him: "Okay, well today may just be a habit. But I like to have a change of clothes because usually I go swimming after I run and I don't want to get back into sweaty gym clothes."
Me: "Okay. That makes more sense."

One thing it's good to communicate to your ESTJ partner that most of the time, your questions are merely curiosity. You don't really mean to sound critical or like you're planning to do anything with the answer (like questions about ex's... I like those questions because it helps me understand -him- more not because I give two shits about his ex) ... 'cause 9 times out of 10, that isn't the case for me. I'm just curious! And for him, I know there's a -lot- that he doesn't get about me... but he tries his damndest to understand, and I try my damndest to explain it to him.

And how old is your ESTJ? Mine is 31... (he's a bit older than me). I think they may be loud and confident when younger, but when they get nearer to 30 they balance out a bit. My ESTJ often admits he used to be argumentative, etc. If she is younger, you can get past that pretty easily I think. Just explain where your coming from, and they'll usually hear you out. If there's one thing I can say about ESTJs, they want to take care of you and make you happy. If you tell them what you want and don't want, they'll definitely take it to heart.

That's what I like about them though even though they can be nazi like they are really respectful towards your decision. lol
 

StephMC

Controlled Mischief
Joined
Mar 2, 2009
Messages
1,044
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Would you prefer to hang around in sweaty workout clothes if you had showers available to use right after you finish your workout?

Hahaha ... no, of course not (although if the gym is a short 5 minute walk from the comfort of his own shower... it didn't quite make sense to me at first). I was just trying to think of one of our weird random conversations and for some reason that was the first thing I thought of... so I just went with it :shock:
 

StephMC

Controlled Mischief
Joined
Mar 2, 2009
Messages
1,044
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
That's what I like about them though even though they can be nazi like they are really respectful towards your decision. lol

Yeah.. it's a pretty awesome thing :cheese: I gotta admit, it's a breath of fresh air sometimes
 

"?"

New member
Joined
May 2, 2007
Messages
1,167
MBTI Type
TiSe
Hi... You both have S and T. I think it's good though...
Actually their function orders are exactly the same TSNF except the energies are different. In fact they are one another's shadows per Beebe's hierarchy. I think Steph's example would be a classic discussion between the two. We both like for things to make sense. Ironically though I have an ESTJ female colleague who can appear introverted at times, but very laid back, whereas I seem happy go lucky but she considers me intense.
 

phoenity

New member
Joined
Feb 27, 2008
Messages
472
Hahaha ... no, of course not (although if the gym is a short 5 minute walk from the comfort of his own shower... it didn't quite make sense to me at first). I was just trying to think of one of our weird random conversations and for some reason that was the first thing I thought of... so I just went with it :shock:

Oh...well if it were only a short walk home, I think I'd prefer the comfort of my own home as well :)
 
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