[ISFP] Why do ISFP tend to underestimate themselves and their impact?

[wolfy]

Do you have any theory on why ISFP tend to underestimate themselves and their impact?

 

[Kasper]

Well than *snippy-paste wall post*


I think it has to do with skills, feedback and impressing other people. Y’all thrive on positive feedback and also try to maximise using natural skills and abilities, when those two are combined an ISFP is in their element, when they don't get feedback, or struggle with accomplishing something I think they get really hard on themselves, although that part often isn't verbalised. There is quite a bit of self doubt in any area that isn't mastered and recognised.

I like recognition. It’s very important to get complimented soon after an accomplishment. If something goes unnoticed or unrewarded, it doesn’t have the immediate impact that I want. I’ve been learning my own positive self-talk. I tend to be a workaholic at whatever it is I am doing. You might say I’m a perfectionist. I want people to be impressed with my performance. I don’t want anyone to be unhappy with my performance so I continue to perform, and that is kind of a driving force. It has been a constant struggle to not overdo it. I need a positive environment to work in and I need the people I’m working with to support me.

 

[Colors]

Do ISFPs really feel this way? I got to be more kind/reactive to the ISFPs in my life then.

 

[wolfy]

Maybe it has to do with a lot of the things that an ISFP brings to the table are intangibles. Others can see how they are making them feel and the effect they are having but unless that is communicated concretely back to the ISFP there is no way of the ISFP knowing for sure.

 

[Quinlan]

I can only speak for myself, but I have very little concept of how I'm perceived by others, whether I'm doing well or not, I'll never know unless someone tells me very directly and straight up, even then my first instinct is to dismiss it or explain it away.

 

[wolfy]

I can only speak for myself, but I have very little concept of how I'm perceived by others, whether I'm doing well or not, I'll never know unless someone tells me very directly and straight up, even then my first instinct is to dismiss it or explain it away.

I feel the same way.

 

[ilovetrannies]

Unfortunately, in school I was treated like I was stupid, so to this day I still have anger problems about it and when someone is complementing me I think they don't mean it. I'm fucked up in the head.

But I bend over backward to be kind to others.

The worst is people call me "sweetie" and I get mad because I think they are being condescending. What do you guys think?

 

[Walking Tourist]

I had a similar experience in school. I was treated as if I was stupid. The attitude toward me seemed to be that I just wasn't capable of learning more difficult subjects so why bother letting me take those classes.
I've always felt that I had to prove that I was smart and that's not easy. I'm never really satisfied with myself.
The thing that bothers me most is when people ignore me or treat me like I don't exist. Even I start wondering if I'm real or if maybe I'm just a figment of someone's imagination.

Unfortunately, in school I was treated like I was stupid, so to this day I still have anger problems about it and when someone is complementing me I think they don't mean it. I'm fucked up in the head.

But I bend over backward to be kind to others.

The worst is people call me "sweetie" and I get mad because I think they are being condescending. What do you guys think?

 

[ilovetrannies]

Walking Tourist. Thank you. I feel the same, too. I like to be left alone but sometimes it really hurts.

 

[Quinlan]

I was never treated as if I was stupid in school, more like very capable but too lazy, which is probably true!

 

[Walking Tourist]

You're welcome.
There are times when I'm happy to be alone, mostly when I'm taking a walk but, in general, I am not a loner so it doesn't feel good to be alone too much and, you're right, it can really hurt sometimes.

Walking Tourist. Thank you. I feel the same, too. I like to be left alone but sometimes it really hurts.

 

[Walking Tourist]

When I was in school, I had an undiagnosed auditory processing disorder. I can't filter out background noise. I probably appeared stupid because I simply could not make sense of what teachers were saying with all of the noise.
I hear everything! Heaters turning on, traffic, a high-pitched noise just before the loudspeakers came on, etc., etc.
When I found out about my processing problem, I also found out that other people actually block out all of that sound. I had no clue!

I was never treated as if I was stupid in school, more like very capable but too lazy, which is probably true!

 

[SaltyWench]

When I was in school, I had an undiagnosed auditory processing disorder. I can't filter out background noise. I probably appeared stupid because I simply could not make sense of what teachers were saying with all of the noise.
I hear everything! Heaters turning on, traffic, a high-pitched noise just before the loudspeakers came on, etc., etc.
When I found out about my processing problem, I also found out that other people actually block out all of that sound. I had no clue!

What did this look like when you were a child? Did you frequently say "What?" and ask people to repeat themselves, even when you were being spoken to clearly?

 

[Jeffster]

Maybe we suck.

 

[Unique]

Aw man you ISFPs

I wish school was more geared for SPs too, I hate being "smart" but not having any way to prove it

It's sad because SPs really do want to make an impact but often aren't given the chance

 

[entropie]

Do you have any theory on why ISFP tend to underestimate themselves and their impact?

Cause you dont need to do otherwise

 

[Little Linguist]

When I was in school, I had an undiagnosed auditory processing disorder. I can't filter out background noise. I probably appeared stupid because I simply could not make sense of what teachers were saying with all of the noise.
I hear everything! Heaters turning on, traffic, a high-pitched noise just before the loudspeakers came on, etc., etc.
When I found out about my processing problem, I also found out that other people actually block out all of that sound. I had no clue!

DUDE, you mean I am not the only one with this problem??? Restaurants, pubs, bars, and clubs are absolute NIGHTMARES for me because I literally cannot hear what other people are saying. I feel like, dude, am I going deaf? But this does not happen without background noise.

I also hate it when I'm trying to sleep or concentrate and there is noise everywhere. GAHHH! So I have ear plugs and/or buds to listen to music that I know and it is predictable. Or a movie I've watched fifty million times and know by heart. Then I can concentrate.

:-/ Is this just an ISFP thing, or do other types have it, too?

 

[Sniffles]

:-/ Is this just an ISFP thing, or do other types have it, too?

No, I have the exact same problem.

 

[Siúil a Rúin]

Do you have any theory on why ISFP tend to underestimate themselves and their impact?

Part of it might be that society rewards assertiveness/aggressiveness, detachment, structure, and status quo. These are not the forte of the ISFP. That external impact is one issue, but ISFPs natural lack of aggressiveness and structure might make them less invested in "achievement". Their contribution is important and unique, and I wish more would naturally value the strengths of the IFP types. They add much lyrical warmth to the world.

:-/ Is this just an ISFP thing, or do other types have it, too?

I once had a conversation in a restaurant with an INTP, INTJ, and I?FJ. It was noisy and the waiters were rushed with that vibe of hurried anxiety. My friends were all calm as we looked over the menu. I asked if any of them could feel the room's anxiety and they were surprised at the idea of it. I have to consciously focus inward in those situations because I become physically anxious. It's a somewhat bizarre feeling. When I go out to eat I need a relatively quiet restaurant with a quiet booth preferably in the corner.

 

[Walking Tourist]

I didn't really say "what?" very much. I tended to answer with inappropriate responses because I didn't hear what was said to me very accurately. I had no idea that I was responding to something that was not actually said.
Here is an example of something that happened (not when I was a child) but was typical of how I hear things:
I was at a pizza parlor with a friend. I heard all of the background noise: the machines, the dishes being put in the dishwasher, even the buzzing of the electricity.
I asked the person behind the counter to identify the different slices of pizza. I pointed to one of them and asked what that was.
"Screechy steak," she said.
"Screechy steak????"
The person behind the counter looked at me as if I were from outer space. I was mystified, wondering how come the steak was screeching.
My friend told the person at the pizza counter that I had a hearing problem and didn't hear her. The person at the counter sighed and loudly and slowly said, "THREE CHEESE STEAK!"
"Oh," I said. "I'll have the screechy steak."
Mumble mumble, said the person behind the counter.
I got my pizza and paid for it and hope that I got the right change (I couldn't hear the price.)
Fortunately, that was just confusing noise. There were and still are other types of noise that cause pain in my ears and head. When I was in school, that was a problem. The fire alarms were excruciating, and I heard a noise before the fire alarm actually went off. Loudspeakers (the feedback), trucks backing up, etc., etc., all create high pitched noises that cause pain.
This is just a brief snap shot of what it looks like.

What did this look like when you were a child? Did you frequently say "What?" and ask people to repeat themselves, even when you were being spoken to clearly?