[ESFP] Motivating an ESFP - is it possible?

[JustHer]

I;ve found that the only way to motivate my ESFP friend is to offer him money, liquor, or women.

 

[PeaceBaby]

... usually, it's money.

Money never worked for mine ... when he was 16, my Dad offered to buy him a car if he could get 80% in school that year.

A CAR!!! Did he get 80% - nope. Fully capable of it too.

Please note that my parents wouldn't pay for my driving lessons nor let me drive their car even when I got my licence at the ripe old age of 18 on my own initiative. And I was an honors student, I might add.

And, in a kind of unfair twist, the same motivation wasn't offered to my daughter at the same age ... but it would have been, as they say, easy pickings for her.

 

[kyuuei]

When I was 20, my main motivation was hot women.

You say that like it's changed at all.

.. I'd contribute to the thread, but.. the SPs have done all the work for me

 

[Jeffster]

You say that like it's changed at all.

Actually, it has. Now my main motivation is providing for my son.




And, you know, using him to attract hot women.

.. I'd contribute to the thread, but.. the SPs have done all the work for me

Yeah, that's just what we do.

 

[magil]

Idk if anyone has said this or not yet, but why not just give him a deadline for when he has to move out by and then follow through.

 

[Clonester]

My best friend is an ESFP. He will talk about something for YEARS before maybe getting around to doing something. I just ignore it after a while. Less talk, more action. He's talked about cleaning and organizing his basement to host parties again for 4 years. I could get it done in a weekend (and an SJ could do it in three hours, lol).

 

[KDude]

fuck.. maybe i'm an esfp.

which SP is the laziest?

 

[BlueFlame]

My best friend is an ESFP. He will talk about something for YEARS before maybe getting around to doing something. I just ignore it after a while. Less talk, more action. He's talked about cleaning and organizing his basement to host parties again for 4 years. I could get it done in a weekend (and an SJ could do it in three hours, lol).

Hah! Try being married to one! I love him dearly, but he simply can not focus on more than one thing at a time, and that focus is always given to whatever seems the most fun. He loves the idea of the end result, just not what it takes to get there UNLESS it's super duper important to him. He probably would have done better with a stronger J who actually likes being in charge of everything menial and dull, but, oh well. I love him anyway.

Oh, and to answer the Op: I've found screaming and throwing things to be a great temporary fix to get things done! And holding sex out like a carrot, but that doesn't really apply in your case...

 

[yvonne]

oh god!! LOL

this is like reading about my boyfriend! i am so frustrated with him, because of his carelessness and now i read that it isn't anything against his nature LOL

i don't know whether i should laugh, or cry... help

 

[IZthe411]

Hah! Try being married to one! I love him dearly, but he simply can not focus on more than one thing at a time, and that focus is always given to whatever seems the most fun. He loves the idea of the end result, just not what it takes to get there UNLESS it's super duper important to him. He probably would have done better with a stronger J who actually likes being in charge of everything menial and dull, but, oh well. I love him anyway.

Oh, and to answer the Op: I've found screaming and throwing things to be a great temporary fix to get things done! And holding sex out like a carrot, but that doesn't really apply in your case...

That was one thing that really bothered me about my ex...She was ISFP, and it didn't seem like she had a motivation or purpose. I think I would have been better with it if she knew it herself and could express it, but she couldn't. I had to coax it out of her, and it bothered me a whole lot.

 

[Ming]

Hah. I realised the irony of the situation.

Here I should be studying for my half yearlies. But no. I'm on the internet. Probably will stay on even if I post to tell myself that I need to work.

YOU NEED TO WORK (aka Keep posting your ass off)