[SP] Progress

[maliafee]

I know my last thread "Am I bothering you..." had to have come off as really insecure. And I was feeling that way.

When I'm offended, I can leave and never come back, easily. Even though I'm embarrassed now about that post, the communication is probably a good sign for me because usually if I thought someone didn't want me somewhere, you just wouldn't see me again.

And I seriously considered leaving.

But I'm glad I didn't... just been laying a bit lower lately.

I'm glad to have gotten through a little conflict without having to flee. It's progress in my mind, even if it's just online.

So I don't know what I'm trying to say exactly except that I'm back and no longer insecure and yeah, my post was goofy but I'm glad that I can still enjoy and participate and hopefully contribute here. Gosh, I'd have missed this forum if I really left for good.

So thanks for being cool, the lot of you.

 

[spirilis]

I'm glad you didn't leave

 

[Night]

I'm glad you've decided to remain, maliafee.

Unhappy people needn't darken your doorstep. Don't allow bitterness to become contagious.

 

[maliafee]

Thanks guys!!!

 

[Virtual ghost]

Don take my post personally since it not written that way.

You are wondering if people dislike you or think you are trolling.
But opening of threads like this one is exactly what makes you look like a troll (subtype attention whore).

I am just giving you an insight nothing more.

 

[maliafee]

Don take my post personally since it not written that way.

You are wondering if people dislike you or think you are trolling.

That wasn't what I was wondering, actually...

But opening of threads like this one is exactly what makes you look like a troll (subtype attention whore).

I am just giving you an insight nothing more.

Yes, in that first post, I was trying to figure out if my effect on the board was negative, and wanted feedback -- a.k.a. I was feeling insecure; I've admitted it.
My current post however is just an acknowledgement of that weakness and a thanks to people for not judging me too harshly on that.

I think people post all kinds of things on this board that might be perceived (often wrongly) as "attention whorish" or "trolling". But in my opinion, such a perception is based on judging people with a harsh eye, and not allowing them to just be themselves. That kind of criticism is unwarranted, imo.

In my last "Am I bothering..." post, I can see that certain people might have judged me as trolling, but in this post? Really? I find that hard to believe. IF that's true, I really don't know where to draw the line. I'm not going to cease being myself, or cease expressing myself as I see proper just because someone might think, "She is looking for attention by saying that." Because their opinions are incredibly subjective. I didn't write this post for attention (I actually didn't write the first one for attention either but honestly was looking for reasons to allow myself to leave the forum, to cut and run when under pressure, as usual, if I can psycho-analyze myself), but if people see it as attention-whoring, I can't help that. I can't help their judgmental viewpoints, either.

 

[Sniffles]

When I'm offended, I can leave and never come back, easily. Even though I'm embarrassed now about that post, the communication is probably a good sign for me because usually if I thought someone didn't want me somewhere, you just wouldn't see me again.

And I seriously considered leaving.

And if that happened, the mob would be ganging up on me.

I apologize again for whatever hurt I caused with my words, I certainly didn't mean them to be taken that seriously. I was largely explaining why I was putting you on my ignore list.

And even if I really did have the meanest of intentions in that statement, again it's only the words of one member here. As you saw in the other thread, there were plenty more people who appreciated your presence here.

 

[maliafee]

And if that happened, the mob would be ganging up on me.

I apologize again for whatever hurt I caused with my words, I certainly didn't mean them to be taken that seriously. I was largely explaining why I was putting you on my ignore list.

And even if I really did have the meanest of intentions in that statement, again it's only the words of one member here. As you saw in the other thread, there were plenty more people who appreciated your presence here.

Peguy, you are so long forgiven! I no longer consider you antagonistic in the least. Please don't worry.

I was responding to someone else for calling my post trollish.

You are terrific. And besides, I shouldn't be so sensitive!

I'm surprised you're 25 though, because for some reason I thought you were much older and sage-y-er.

 

[LucrativeSid]

Thanks for staying! You've done well. Being open and sharing an insecurity takes courage - how could anyone hope for a more healthy way of dealing with something? But I wouldn't even consider you any more insecure than anybody else in the world. It was just in the light for a moment and now everything is back to normal.

 

[NewEra]

So thanks for being cool, the lot of you.

No problem. You seem like a very likable person.

 

[527468]

Damn that's a tasty ass pizza.

 

[Jeffster]

Malia, you seem pretty cool to me. And I'll let you in on a little secret. I got some mixed reactions when I joined this forum too. The great majority of the comments I got were along the lines of "you are so refreshing!" and "I love your sense of humor!" But I was also called "creepy" by one person, a "lecher" by another, I was asked if I was putting on an act, one person told me "I pity you", and another said I "brought the IQ of the board down 50 points." Rick Nelson said "You can't please everyone, so you got to please yourself." And he wasn't just talking about in bed.

The point is that this whole forum is based around people being themselves. What makes people tick, and what we can maybe learn from that. Whatever anyone thinks of me, all I can do is be me. It doesn't mean I take a hostile "I'm a jerk and you have to deal with it" attitude, it just means I don't sit around worrying if I'm bothering someone or not. If someone really is bothered by me, and they actually tell me, it might be something we can actually work out. It's happened on a few occasions. But if they just hold something against me from afar, then, hey, that's their problem, not mine. Life goes on. And it's too short to walk on eggshells or constantly worry that I might be doing something wrong. So I say Rock on with your cool self. And if the Devil doesn't like it, he can sit on a tack.

Yeah, there's a reason SPs don't do metaphors.

Thanks for staying! You've done well. Being open and sharing an insecurity takes courage - how could anyone hope for a more healthy way of dealing with something? But I wouldn't even consider you any more insecure than anybody else in the world. It was just in the light for a moment and now everything is back to normal.

Oh, and I very rarely give advice, unless someone asks me, but one thing I can tell you. Malia, is that listening to LucrativeSid is usually a good thing to do.

 

[Kasper]

But opening of threads like this one is exactly what makes you look like a troll (subtype attention whore).

Attention whoring and trolling are very different things. Trolling involves trying to get a reaction out of or bait someone into a debate by using personal insults or by giving the perception of personal insults. Attention whoring is just that, whoring for attention.

This is not to say that I consider maliafee an attention whore.

 

[professor goodstain]

mal....by "one of those moments" in the (hook up) thread, i mean one of these moments. As in Ne feeding Ne much the same as what compels one to start a thread due to a feeling of misunderstanding. Difference is Ne feeding Ne makes placing thought into words to appear very ambiguous.

I would start a thread but it would be very amiguous. Proof: just take a peak at my threads. At least this one is very legit. And Ne tells me it's bigtime MBTI related. The other Ne knows how but it's too busy being jealous of the other Ne function.

 

[NewEra]

Malia, you seem pretty cool to me. And I'll let you in on a little secret. I got some mixed reactions when I joined this forum too. The great majority of the comments I got were along the lines of "you are so refreshing!" and "I love your sense of humor!" But I was also called "creepy" by one person, a "lecher" by another, I was asked if I was putting on an act, one person told me "I pity you", and another said I "brought the IQ of the board down 50 points." Rick Nelson said "You can't please everyone, so you got to please yourself." And he wasn't just talking about in bed.

The point is that this whole forum is based around people being themselves. What makes people tick, and what we can maybe learn from that. Whatever anyone thinks of me, all I can do is be me. It doesn't mean I take a hostile "I'm a jerk and you have to deal with it" attitude, it just means I don't sit around worrying if I'm bothering someone or not. If someone really is bothered by me, and they actually tell me, it might be something we can actually work out. It's happened on a few occasions. But if they just hold something against me from afar, then, hey, that's their problem, not mine. Life goes on. And it's too short to walk on eggshells or constantly worry that I might be doing something wrong. So I say Rock on with your cool self. And if the Devil doesn't like it, he can sit on a tack.

Yeah, there's a reason SPs don't do metaphors.




Oh, and I very rarely give advice, unless someone asks me, but one thing I can tell you. Malia, is that listening to LucrativeSid is usually a good thing to do.

Awesome avatar.

 

[maliafee]

Damn that's a tasty ass pizza.

I ate two pieces of that thing!!! *yum*

 

[sculpting]

malia, I totally get what you are saying about shutting up the shop and getting out of town when you have upset people. Do you do this in other parts of your life as well? (I do sometimes so it just sounded familiar) I like pizza.

 

[maliafee]

First off, thanks to those of you who've said nice things to me, and have been supportive.

As to Jeffster, thanks for sharing your initial experience on this site. That was good to hear, especially from someone who I admire so much on this forum.

Your advice is just what I needed to hear. I don't worry THAT much about what people think until they seem really upset with me, and then I feel terrible that I've somehow upset them... but you're absolutely correct -- all we can do is be ourselves.

P.S. I liked your metaphor! Haha...

Malia, you seem pretty cool to me. And I'll let you in on a little secret. I got some mixed reactions when I joined this forum too. The great majority of the comments I got were along the lines of "you are so refreshing!" and "I love your sense of humor!" But I was also called "creepy" by one person, a "lecher" by another, I was asked if I was putting on an act, one person told me "I pity you", and another said I "brought the IQ of the board down 50 points." Rick Nelson said "You can't please everyone, so you got to please yourself." And he wasn't just talking about in bed.

The point is that this whole forum is based around people being themselves. What makes people tick, and what we can maybe learn from that. Whatever anyone thinks of me, all I can do is be me. It doesn't mean I take a hostile "I'm a jerk and you have to deal with it" attitude, it just means I don't sit around worrying if I'm bothering someone or not. If someone really is bothered by me, and they actually tell me, it might be something we can actually work out. It's happened on a few occasions. But if they just hold something against me from afar, then, hey, that's their problem, not mine. Life goes on. And it's too short to walk on eggshells or constantly worry that I might be doing something wrong. So I say Rock on with your cool self. And if the Devil doesn't like it, he can sit on a tack.

Yeah, there's a reason SPs don't do metaphors.

Oh, and I very rarely give advice, unless someone asks me, but one thing I can tell you. Malia, is that listening to LucrativeSid is usually a good thing to do.

 

[Ivy]

Moved from Bonfire... and I'm glad you're staying.

 

[ThatsWhatHeSaid]

Malia, you seem pretty cool to me. And I'll let you in on a little secret. I got some mixed reactions when I joined this forum too. The great majority of the comments I got were along the lines of "you are so refreshing!" and "I love your sense of humor!" But I was also called "creepy" by one person, a "lecher" by another, I was asked if I was putting on an act, one person told me "I pity you", and another said I "brought the IQ of the board down 50 points."

Hey, you left out my insults! I worked on those, man!




malia,

Who are you? Oh that's right, the chef. Chef malia. Emerralia.

There's nothing to be embarrassed about. Everyone thinks about leaving the forum at least once a week.

Sincerely,
Edahn