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  1. #1
    Is Willard in Footloose!! CJ99's Avatar
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    Default cockiness and xstps!

    Hi!
    I was wondering if any xstps could tell me if cockiness was a typical trait of you guys as i think my best mate is an xstp and he is cocky as hell and i really need to find a way to teach him some humility.

  2. #2
    Member Brouhaha's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CJ99 View Post
    Hi!
    I was wondering if any xstps could tell me if cockiness was a typical trait of you guys as i think my best mate is an xstp and he is cocky as hell and i really need to find a way to teach him some humility.
    Is he right all the time? If he is then maybe the cockiness is merited.

  3. #3
    Is Willard in Footloose!! CJ99's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brouhaha View Post
    Is he right all the time? If he is then maybe the cockiness is merited.
    No. He is fairly good at more or less everything. But only good. I'm better than him at a few things like maths, chemistry and stuff like that but he is good at mostly everything in life.
    But he always has been but he hasn't always been cocky.

  4. #4
    Member Brouhaha's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CJ99 View Post
    No. He is fairly good at more or less everything. But only good. I'm better than him at a few things like maths, chemistry and stuff like that but he is good at mostly everything in life.
    But he always has been but he hasn't always been cocky.
    Well I find myself in this dilemma too. I'm pretty good at just about everything I try(except math). And to a certain degree I'm rather vain and cocky. The problem is he probably started acting vain as a joke, and then when he realized that he really was good at many things it became real vanity. I have that to a certain extent. It's just that I see conceitedness as an unattractive quality, so I suppress it. If he doesn't like other vain people, try to draw correlations between him and them and maybe he'll change himself because he doesn't like being associated with them? Just an idea. I can't say it would work.

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    Member Brouhaha's Avatar
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    Or another thought, if he says he's awesome agree with him. It always distresses me when people actually say that I'm really awesome. Since I'm usually joking when I say it, I don't know what to do when I get a real compliment, therefore to avoid getting these compliments that I dislike, I tone down on the "I'm amazing."
    Last edited by Brouhaha; 02-03-2009 at 03:05 PM. Reason: Additional thoughts.

  6. #6
    Artisan Conquerer Halla74's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CJ99 View Post
    Hi!
    I was wondering if any xstps could tell me if cockiness was a typical trait of you guys as i think my best mate is an xstp and he is cocky as hell and i really need to find a way to teach him some humility.
    OK, I'm an ESTP, off the charts in all measures, and I think that cockiness is definitley a default characteristic of XSTPs. The deal is this though, we all must learn to temper our behavior in order to get along in the worlds we live in.

    For instance, it does me no good to be cocky with my wife, she would get pissed and I'd get the silent treatment for 4-5 days, so if I am cocky with her its playful and in jest.

    Second, it does me no good to be cocky with my boss. If I were to do that he would fire my ass or just give me crap assignments for a few weeks until I got my ego in check.

    BUT, cockiness does have its place, especially with humor, and in other more casual interpersonal relations. I don't take any shit from coworkers who try to get snotty with me, I shut them down while smiling the whole time and go on about my business. Also, if someone in a conversation is being a cocky jerk and not entertaining the other participants, then I'll usually do what I need to in order to keep things lively.

    I do believe their is a big difference between COCKINESS and CONFIDENT. Confidence is more accepted, as it is not delivered with any condescending tone. Cockiness is less tolerated as it is more of a juvenile means of asserting one's self in the presence of others.

    So, if you want to get back at this fellow, make a direct challenge at him for something you know you will school him in. I guarantee you if you shut him down a few times and prove that you are not intimidated by him, he will chill out a little bit.


  7. #7
    Magical BlackCat's Avatar
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    Well, just because your best friend is cocky and just so happens to be STP doesn't mean all STPs are. Cockiness is a human trait in general, anyone can be cocky for one reason or another.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

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    homo-loving sonovagun anii's Avatar
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    I don't think trying to teach an XSTP humility will work; they just laugh it off and move on.

    (It's almost like they are admiring your technique and storing it for later use.)
    There's reason to be afraid, and reason to open your heart. ~ Seal

    Refreshment for your ears: www.kexp.org

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    Self-confidence is healthy. Cockiness is projecting that confidence outwardly to draw attention to it. To me, cockiness stems from a need/desire of others to realize your "self-confidence", but in actuality stems from a lack of self-confidence.

    Self-confidence is knowing you're amazing without needing to have anyone tell you so. Therefore, humility and true self-confidence naturally go hand-in-hand.


    I'd say cockiness is a trait of immature STPs. He'll learn - we all do.

  10. #10
    Is Willard in Footloose!! CJ99's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BlackCat View Post
    Well, just because your best friend is cocky and just so happens to be STP doesn't mean all STPs are. Cockiness is a human trait in general, anyone can be cocky for one reason or another.
    I'm not saying all STPs are i'm asking if they are thus this thread.

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