Hey there, Miller. Did you know that babies come from cabbages? It's true. Global warming? Not happening. Also, my inferior Ti is really awesome and I use it a lot. I could probably defeat a chess grandmaster if I wanted to. We don't need math. All we need is LOVE. And I'm always right because I *feel* that way.
How am I doing?
That kind of shit would just make me give you a blank stare. You might get a "uh huh" and a roll of the eyes.
I suggest bringing up something like "Hey, let's go snowboarding," or "How awesome would it be if there were an earthquake RIGHT NOW?"
It feels like your goal is to avoid conflict in the house, rather than forming a deep connection with this guy. That's probably best, at least to start. If you have things in common, friendship will happen naturally. otherwise, well, most of the istps I've known have a pretty easy time being polite to people we don't particularly like or dislike, as long as we aren't forced into a corner. most people aren't looking to cause trouble, I think.
As an ENFP, though I can be too exuberant and overbearing. I really want to make friends with this ISTP but I'm worried that he thinks I'm flaky and stupid. Everyone in this house is a sci-fi/comic book nerd and he has shown nothing but disdain for our interests and our goals. I have no idea how to show him that we are competent, good natured people. He cuts short every conversation I have with him and frequently criticises me and the other roomates about our life choices.
What is the best way to make my new ISTP roomate comfortable? How do I befriend him without scaring him off with my NF excitement? I've never actually had any S type friends so I really don't know how to relate to him.
Unless you are taking personal offense where the ISTP means none (which is possible), he sounds like a real asshole and not particularly healthy ISTP. I guess if I were you I would try and find out if he is intentionally being an ass, or just coming off as one.
The only way I've ever been able to relate to ISTPs (as an NF) is through common interests. We build a bond talking about or building things, doing things together, and so on and once we reach a certain level they'll tolerate and listen to my NF stuff. The fact that he seems to pretty much hold all of your interests in disdain does not bode well.
Also, is this the ISTP whose ENTJ girlfriend is just using him for connections that he has?
Originally Posted by rhinosaur
"How awesome would it be if there were an earthquake RIGHT NOW?"
That reminds me of how my ISTP friend gets seriously excited whenever we are about to get hit by a hurricane, but even the threat of a minor snow storm puts him in a sour mood.
The biggest thing is accept us for who we are and we will accept you for who you are. If he doesnt accept you, he probably doesnt feel accepted for who he is. Find out his strengths, and have him help you. Be thankful, but not showy like others said. We are very uncomfortable if we feel like we need to show emotion. I know its stupid, but this is how we are and we want to be accepted for who we are. It causes anxiety like theres no tomorrow. If you want to make a show and cant contain yourself, keep the focus off of him. For me a thanks and maybe a hug(from a female) works wonders or just a thanks from a guy, but dont expect a response other than maybe a smile and a your welcome.
We live to feel appreciated, we will go above and beyond expectations and never ask for anything in return other than to feel appreciated. Just a warning, when we dont feel appreciated we will hold everything we have done in your face, its not to say that we wish we didnt do it, or that we dont want to do it, or that we are trying to get something in return for what we have done, it is us just saying "I have gone above and beyond for you, please appreciate what I do"
The biggest advice I can give you is we want to feel appreciated and dont make us feel like we need to show emotions.