I passionately believe that the only positive way of using type is to see it as a tool that informs you as to the best way to ask the right kinds of questions, and also frame people's responses in a positive way. It also seems obvious that most of what's labeled as type-related really isn't. Your ex-boyfriends' messy habits, your bosses lack of thoughtfulness, your best friends' flightiness, your mother's bossiness, etc., is probably related more to what they grew up with and what's going on in their individual lives, not their "type code". I suspect most of what people like to believe is type-related is actually just the result of individuals we know having lived at a certain time, in a certain place, under certain circumstances, and that if type had anything to do with the expression of these behavior traits, it influenced the motives behind the expression of them, not the behavior itself. Yes, I believe there are observable patterns of behavior and that this is to some degree related to type (as Keirsey would say), but patterns that relate to temperament are not the same thing as patterns of contextual behavior. It seems to me that the more you actually learn and understand about type, the less you see it as being about labeling contextual behavior, and the more you begin to understand what's meant by the core needs and values that drive people, and the better you can understand that each set of needs and values are valuable, good, and worth including people of each type in your life as much as possible, because diversity is good.
I agree. But, I'm sure you are aware, that a lot of the bolded happens when the 'misunderstood' finally gets a soapbox. E.g., the NT or N preference over S, so rampant in forum discussions of typology. Or, T over F. Also, the extrapolation many make regarding intelligence level due to types. E.g., contrary to what one would glean from reading the forum topics, NT doesn't predispose one to be intelligent.
Just take comfort in knowing that those who protest too much are the ones who's got the most issues, regardless of type. Maybe, for example, feel sorry for those some of those misunderstood N's, that they feel the need to roar so loud?
I've openly stated that I intend to remain a member and to gather interesting and useful stories and insight for my work. And, I hope (in my heart of hearts) some useful clues for navigating my relationship with my INFJ woman, which I feel is really important no matter which direction it goes.
I don't know how to navigate adolescent behaviors in cyber-communities without wasting tremendous amounts of time; if I did, I would happily continue to participate here and enjoy those members who really want to dig into ideas and share their stories, without the spitballs. I've done this before, a number of times, and it usually ends up being time I should have invested elsewhere. I don't want that to be the case here; but I don't know how to make it work, if the environment is unpoliced.
This is a huge forum and there is a wide age range, but it's worth noting that there are a lot of teens and early twenty-somethings here. An extremely kind person pointed that out to me almost as soon as I got here and I found it helpful to bear in mind -- I hope you will find it helpful, too.