I agree the ISTPs I have dealt with are immature. I'm not dealing with teenagers here either, but adult men in their 30s....
Anyway, your interest in understanding theoretical things like this probably means you're very well-rounded though.
The older I get, the more I realize maturity has very little to do with physical age, but rather more about life experiences.
I'm only interested in the theory of psychology because I see a practical use. A tool for understanding myself and other people in almost an analytical way, which makes it more comfortable for me.
As for the robot impression, it's from the calculated movements, the very precise way of speaking (not to be confused with some N type's articulation of ideas), the way all interests seem to be physical, the apparent lack of any emotion. The face, the eyes and the voice often don't show much beyond "pleasant". I haven't dated / known any ISTP long enough to see real anger even, just the irritation when they feel their boundaries are invaded.
I didn't think it would come out quite like that, but that's why I wanted to hear you say it
Apparent lack of changing emotion is just exactly that. Personally, I find comfort in my emotional calmness, and I think a lot of other people around me do as well.
However, that does not mean I'm incapable of experiencing them. When I'm doing things I really enjoy, or with people I really love, my emotions are incredibly intense, but I can't describe them with any words other than happiness. I can't communicate them like I can my sensory perceptions, because I'm just not as in touch with them as you are.
I think my emotions are best expressed through my eyes, face, and body language so I love connecting with people in this way. But you won't see it unless we're close and I trust you. Otherwise, you'll only see the robot.
I don't mean it in an insulting way, but this is coming from someone who lives largely in their head and has a very expressive face and is floating through life in a cloud and is often out of touch with the environment around me, but on a rollercoaster of emotions. My daydreams are essentially intense movies in my head, and they interrupt my life at their will. I can make an entire story around someone I just met or something I see that intrigues me. Also, my creativity is conceptual, so I ponder an idea for a long time before I take action in my artistic pursuits.
I would look at you as just like you described, someone who was stuck in a waking dream. But at the same time I would be fascinated by it because it is so foreign to me. I'd want to know what you were dreaming about. I'd be interested to hear the stories that you make up in your mind. I'd be envious because, while I feel this creativeness in the deepest parts of myself, I've never been able to get in touch with that part of me in a way I can express. And as much as I love dreaming, it's difficult for me to get into that mindset. Honestly, I can't even remember my dreams I've just had when I wake up every morning - how is that for sad?
So from my perspective, it seems like ISTPs are so physical, even their thinking can seem like a computer processing data. In conversation, the most fanciful they get is describing something they saw. Like describing scenery on a vacation or something. They do it in very vivid terms, and that's charming to me.
I do think like a computer, but it's the way I am and it never gets boring to me. I take in sensory information, and process it by thinking about it and interpreting it. I enjoy thinking in a logical way, but it's not always like that. It's taking in information and processing it, often without even "thinking" about it. What does this mean, how does this work, ooh look at the shapes and colors in that pretty cloud.
I can appreciate the differences too... I mentioned in another thread that ISTPs can seem very sexy and romantic to me with the way they live in the moment and are so hands-on and adventurous. They seem "sensual". I admire it, because I have a lot of difficulty being that way. But it makes me sad, because I also think I could never connect with them on a deeper level. I've had a sort of moth to flame fascination with a few.
Connection just requires effort and active listening. We don't think that way naturally, but that doesn't mean we can't understand perceptions that are foreign to us. On the contrary, it's refreshing to hear that not everyone views the world in the same way, or thinks about the same things. It expands our minds and views of reality.
You can connect with someone vastly different than you by just taking the time to share your stories and perceptions, being open-minded, and having a desire to understand something other than yourself.
You can participate in my adventures, and I can listen to and interact with your dreams
My adventures are my dreams, just acted out in real time, and real to me since I can feel, see, hear, taste and smell the environment of my dream.
For example....I like art & music a lot. I nearly live for it. The ISTPs I have known like it to, but it's more of a sensory thing. They like hands-on art and live music they can feel physically. For me, music and art is an emotional experience in itself. So we'll both be excited about the same things, but then I feel let down when their feelings seem comparatively shallow to mine. That probably sounds judgmental, but as an INFP, my values are HUGE, and of course I value FEELINGS a lot.
I would say I'm the same way, but different at the same time. The art I live for is the art I feel in my precise physical movement, the art I see in the almost unbearable beauty of nature and the randomness of life, the sunset skies I see every evening where the rainbow colored clouds look like the strokes of a paintbrush. This is the "art" I live for - the art in my sensory experience of my reality. That doesn't mean I don't appreciate all other forms of art.
As for music, it's a huge part of my life as I would say it as one of the best ways I feel my emotions. I feel the artists' emotions through the lyrics, tone of their voice, and the sounds of instruments. I may have difficulty telling you how I'm feeling, but I can play you a song that says it better than my own words ever could.
We are exactly the same in our passions for life, but completely opposite in the way we think and perceive them. Like you said, your life is an emotional rollercoaster, and mine is a long, slow, gently rolling country road.
And all that said, I'm disappointed you perceive me as being so shallow, but the most important point to get across is that your perception is only that due to ignorance. And I will be the first to admit I am ignorant myself - I know nothing about the NF perception of reality, but I want to understand.
So thank you for sharing
