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[ISTP] ISTPs need relationships too!

millerm277

New member
Joined
Feb 1, 2008
Messages
978
MBTI Type
ISTP
It's not one of those 350Z fake sports cars, is it?

Agreed on that. And no, mine is a 96' 300zx TT. Awesome car, if it does cost a bit more to keep running and maintained than other vehicles...

Also, agreed with Aelan as well.
 

pardo

New member
Joined
May 24, 2008
Messages
51
MBTI Type
istp
ISTP here... my g/f is ESxJ... in almost 2 years, every once in a few months we had the same argument because I want to be alone while she wants more time with me.
Shit, it's not my fault:(( ...sometimes I have an urge to just DO something. I can't be chit-chatting and love making all night and then repeat the day after. If I'm not sure I'll have my alone time at least on sundays, I become impatient.
These arguments with her make me feel like I'm and egoist, self centered and undeserving of her love. She is emotionally attached and giving, to a point that I don't even understand, while I'm all for the "cost-benefit analysis" as someone already stated. I haven't experienced "emotional sparkles" with women since adolescence and I don't miss them at all.
I don't know if and to what extent I should go against my 'lone wolf' nature to please others. To this day, I never made many efforts.
Someone said that ISTPs are only truly in love with their hobbies: I agree completely.
But I'm ashamed of being so heartless. I'd never hurt a fly, I have a strong sense of ethics especially in relationships... but still, I don't really feel it and it makes me very sad when people are offended by my attitude.
 

oasispaw

New member
Joined
Jan 2, 2008
Messages
265
MBTI Type
isfj
I dated 2 different ISTP's. It did NOT work out. how can someone possibly need that much privacy!! grr.. they never want to spend time with me!

(in other words, not esfp.)

not ISFJ either. the ISTP i dated invited me over all the time and then ignored me for HOURS. i watched him play internet chess, perfect dark, and watched so many hours of late night tv during our 4 year relationship. he also wrote music which was totally cool, but i would've rather been doing something else (like writing my own music) than sitting there bored out of my mind while he was doing all of his stuff. he expected me to always be available, but was not often available for me. it was stupid. i neglected many friendships trying to make it work, but he was basically a loser who made me feel bad about myself for being a responsible adult. in the end, not worth the effort. :doh:
 

entropie

Permabanned
Joined
Apr 24, 2008
Messages
16,767
MBTI Type
entp
Enneagram
783
ISTP's need relationships ? You better re-think that, in case you dont want to be the moron of the day :D
 

The Ü™

Permabanned
Joined
May 26, 2007
Messages
11,910
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
You guys each need an ENFP to complete you.
 

pardo

New member
Joined
May 24, 2008
Messages
51
MBTI Type
istp
the ISTP i dated invited me over all the time and then ignored me for HOURS.
Sounds pretty extreme to me. That behaviour would upset anyone but a saint...
Anyway, couples should be together for the sake of being together, but personal activities should stay personal :eek:
I know that some people don't see things this way and try to involve their partners in their hobbies. But I'm not sure if their partners, then, get involved out of genuine interest or simply because they want to please the other-_-
Anyway, as IxTP I value my hobbies also because they are things I can do by myself! I've never invited people to "watch" (unless they manifested the intention first, as it happens occasionally when I get my hands on some new item of interest to them).
 

Nonsensical

New member
Joined
Aug 2, 2008
Messages
4,006
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7
My best friends brother is an ISTP, and he's been in a very close relationship for about 8 months now, with an ESFP.
 

351Stang

New member
Joined
Oct 4, 2008
Messages
32
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
9
My best friends brother is an ISTP, and he's been in a very close relationship for about 8 months now, with an ESFP.

I've instantly clicked with nearly every ESFP I've met, they're such fun spontaneous people that always seem to be able to coax me out of my defensive shell. I have such a hard time staying connected with them though because they all seem to have a never ending list of people to hang out with already...
In otherwords ESFP= happiness for ISTP

@shortnsweet. Hm, that's odd. Mostly because I don't find myself being at all like that generally.

@PinkPiranha....that sounds very scarily like my life, except that I always prefer to drive.

Agreed with, on both points.
 

kendoiwan

I am Sofa King!!!
Joined
Dec 24, 2008
Messages
1,334
MBTI Type
IsTP
In my experience I've gotten along best with NF's of all stripes in terms of dating. I like SJ girls if they're not too vanilla. But I don't discriminate at all based on type as a rule, it'd be silly, you know?
 

Doppleganger

New member
Joined
Sep 29, 2008
Messages
161
MBTI Type
IxtP
Enneagram
5w4
I can't say I've ever cared about being in a relationship.
 

runvardh

にゃん
Joined
Jun 23, 2007
Messages
8,541
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
I wonder what it would be like to date an ISTP...
 

kendoiwan

I am Sofa King!!!
Joined
Dec 24, 2008
Messages
1,334
MBTI Type
IsTP
Why don't you hop on the back of my bike and find out...
 

runvardh

にゃん
Joined
Jun 23, 2007
Messages
8,541
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
I'm a dude who's into chicks, just making sure no one gets confused on that one.
 

Domino

ENFJ In Chains
Joined
Nov 5, 2007
Messages
11,429
MBTI Type
eNFJ
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
I have a question:

An ISTP guy I've been friends with for many years is parting ways (not with me, just moving along due to circumstances). He dropped me a line to let me know. I realize he wouldn't have bothered to say anything if he didn't care, but it left me saying, "What do you mean 'I'm leaving'? It's not okay for you to just drop out of my life forever." I told him where he can reach me, of course, but I started wondering what makes an STP capable of cutting off contact with a person they care about in such a fashion? I would find it truly painful and even impossible in certain situations.
 

kendoiwan

I am Sofa King!!!
Joined
Dec 24, 2008
Messages
1,334
MBTI Type
IsTP
I have a question:

An ISTP guy I've been friends with for many years is parting ways (not with me, just moving along due to circumstances). He dropped me a line to let me know. I realize he wouldn't have bothered to say anything if he didn't care, but it left me saying, "What do you mean 'I'm leaving'? It's not okay for you to just drop out of my life forever." I told him where he can reach me, of course, but I started wondering what makes an STP capable of cutting off contact with a person they care about in such a fashion? I would find it truly painful and even impossible in certain situations.

He see's the need to leave as overriding the need to stay. Obviously you were a factor (you'll be missed) in the decision else you wouldn't know at all. But if it's time to go, in his mind, then it's time to go. He has his reasons.
 

Domino

ENFJ In Chains
Joined
Nov 5, 2007
Messages
11,429
MBTI Type
eNFJ
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
He see's the need to leave as overriding the need to stay. Obviously you were a factor (you'll be missed) in the decision else you wouldn't know at all. But if it's time to go, in his mind, then it's time to go. He has his reasons.

Yes, I didn't want to pry, and thankfully he took initiative and explained it to me (which I also realize wouldn't have happened voluntarily if he didn't care about me in the equation) and I was glad to know what was going on, but I think maybe he felt like since it was his choice to go that it would be an imposition to ask to stay in touch? I told him he wasn't disappearing on me (something I can't tolerate without deep strain) so I told him where I'd be. Absence isn't wanted, but I can tolerate it if I know where you are.

Whatever the motivation, I told him he couldn't ghost on me. I hope that was enough.
 
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