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  1. #21
    Senior Member millerm277's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Winz View Post
    Do you find him hurting your feelings alot? With bluntness/directness and all?
    That's our natural way of functioning, however...we are certainly capable of not speaking like that as well. I generally find that my girlfriend is the one that I am the least blunt with, as I am...um, more sensitive to her feelings than to most other people.
    I-95%, S-84%, T-89%, P-84%

  2. #22
    Member Winz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by millerm277 View Post
    That's our natural way of functioning, however...we are certainly capable of not speaking like that as well. I generally find that my girlfriend is the one that I am the least blunt with, as I am...um, more sensitive to her feelings than to most other people.
    Well, yeah. *points to her type* I just want to know if he -does- hurt her feelings alot in that way. Personally, I would find it draining to be constantly worrying that I'd hurt my spouse's feelings (if I had one) with every single thing I said. But that's just me.

    Hopefully this doesn't get interpreted in the wrong way...

  3. #23
    Senior Member ColonelGadaafi's Avatar
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    Im going to say NF's/NFJ's, what istps need are people who understand their implications, life-styles, need for privacy and personal space. But im given the impression that most ISTP's (especially males) are emotionally self-sufficient and independent that they really have no need of a relationship, they are hobbyist(most of the istp's that i have came in contact with) who practically fall in-love with their hobbies, most are content with a collection of assorted tools, a book on electronics and large sortiment of parts. They are truly the INTP's of technical matters.
    "Where can you flee? What road will you use to escape us? Our horses are swift, our arrows sharp, our swords like thunderbolts, our hearts as hard as the mountains, our soldiers as numerous as the sand. Fortresses will not detain us, nor arms stop us. Your prayers to God will not avail against us. We are not moved by tears nor touched by lamentations."

  4. #24
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    I dated 2 different ISTP's. It did NOT work out. how can someone possibly need that much privacy!! grr.. they never want to spend time with me!

    (in other words, not esfp.)

  5. #25
    Member Winz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by shortnsweet View Post
    I dated 2 different ISTP's. It did NOT work out. how can someone possibly need that much privacy!! grr.. they never want to spend time with me!

    (in other words, not esfp.)
    Yeah, I have an ESFP friend. I think she thinks I hate her or something which is really not the case... Just... You know

  6. #26
    Senior Member millerm277's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Introverted-esfp View Post
    But im given the impression that most ISTP's (especially males) are emotionally self-sufficient and independent that they really have no need of a relationship
    Need? Definitely not. Being single is not some major problem for me, however...being in a relationship with someone who I really like/love is still far better. But, it does mean, that I'm not going to stick with a hopeless relationship because I think it's better than being single.

    @Shortnsweet, want to elaborate a bit? Because maybe just I'm a semi well-developed ISTP, but I don't feel I have a huge need for privacy generally. And for the most part, my momentary feeling/emotions are the only things I keep private. (Negative ones moreso).
    I-95%, S-84%, T-89%, P-84%

  7. #27
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    hmm.. okay well I dated one of these said ISTP's on and off for three years. Big problems were that he always wanted to go smoke a cigarette or something by himself, didn't want to spend time together often enough, and was kind of emotionally unavailable. (Didn't really want to chit chat unless it was about something very important.) He liked some of my friends too, but did not want to hang out with them very often, because they were just too much for him. He wanted to sit in a dark room and watch movies, instead.

    edit: (I don't equate emotionally unavailable with the inability to chit-chat really, those were meant to be two different points)

  8. #28
    Senior Member INTJMom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Winz View Post
    Okay, I debated with myself for a week or so whether or not I should even make a post, and I decided that I really just want to know the answer. I'm looking for purely theoretical opinions here. Obviously there's the whole "everybody is their own individual person even if they fit into a certain type" thing, so if that's all you have to say... Well...

    Are there any ideal type for ISTPs to be coupled with? And if you are an ISTP, what types do you find yourself getting along with best?

    I feel like a massive lametard for asking this.
    My husband is an ISTP. I'm an INTJ. We've been married over 26 years.
    We have a lot going for us, but I wouldn't say it's absolutely perfect.
    One area where we both fall short is that we tend to neglect each other.
    We're not very good at maintaining relationships.
    We're both better at troubleshooting them.
    IOW: we work on it when there's a problem.

  9. #29
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    My ISTP bff was around me a lot. He and I rarely argued, but when we did, it felt REALLY bad, and we tried to get it over with as soon as possible. I think he was perhaps instinctively very careful with my feelings, not because he had to, because he just wanted to, I guess. He was a bit overprotective of me at times, but he truly had confidence in my intelligence and my ability to handle myself. He was so tall that when we were at pool parties, I could sit on his shoulders in the deep end and shout bombastic things at the lesser mortals in the shallow end. lol

    They can be very lone wolf and possessive of their free time (so can I, for that matter), but it seemed he was always dragging me out somewhere, even if it was just to drive around, or have me drive him around in his own car.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
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    Dramatic>Sensitive>Serious

  10. #30
    Senior Member bronte's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Winz View Post
    Also:



    Do you find him hurting your feelings alot? With bluntness/directness and all?
    I dont think my istp husband is blunt - or at least only when he is forced into situations he finds really difficult - the kids can do this - generally though he will just be uncommunicative if upset or if he disagrees

    he's blunt with his mates but in a matey blokey way

    I think that as he's got older he's much more sensitive - especially with humour - he used to use sarcasm in a much sharper way .

    my son is estp and I think their humour is very similar - they really make me laugh
    I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
    Maya Angelou

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