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  1. #1
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    Default ESFP + ESFP relationship.

    First off let me introduce myself. My name is Rachel and I'm an ENFP. I am not new to typology, or socionics. I've been lurking on this board for a while, and I think a lot of you forget about the individualism of people and kinda don't like how all ENFP's do this or INFJ's are like that, its very stereo typed. So please don't stereo type me or my question and give me a real answer please. Don't assume I am a certain way just because I am an ENFP. I have a real problem and I need some advice. I'm in a relationship with an ESFP.

    He 'loves' me. All his friends know it, and I'll get my ass kicked or worse if I try to break up with him, or hurt him in any way. Does anyone know what I'm talking about? Help.

  2. #2
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    I can't proceed it seems, because you're asking for advice based on peoples' types, but ask that I not consider your type. Oh well!

  3. #3
    veteran attention whore Jeffster's Avatar
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    A lot of Hollywood hookups are ESFP + ESFP relationships. They don't tend to last long.

    Sorry, I didn't really read the first post. What?
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  4. #4
    Broud Balestinian G-Virus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Water View Post
    He 'loves' me. All his friends know it, and I'll get my ass kicked or worse if I try to break up with him, or hurt him in any way. Does anyone know what I'm talking about? Help.
    Is this an abusive relationship?

    I am not sure what you are asking, can you be more clear?
    Seek freedom and become captive of your desires, seek discipline and find your liberty.

    "If you go looking for something in particular, your chances of finding it are very bad, because of all the things in the world, you're only looking for one of them. If you go looking for anything at all, your chances of finding it are very good, because of all the things in the world, you're sure to find some of them."

  5. #5
    Let's make this showy! raz's Avatar
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    I just always thought ESFP's were only able to get along with other ESFP's.

    Are you trying to say that you're ENFP but....not an ENFP? All ENFP's aren't created equal, but your motivations are all the same.

    But. Wait. You're asking about ESFP's dating ESFP's, but you're an ENFP saying you're in a relationship with an ESFP? My head is swirling.

  6. #6
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Water View Post
    He 'loves' me. All his friends know it, and I'll get my ass kicked or worse if I try to break up with him, or hurt him in any way. Does anyone know what I'm talking about? Help.
    It would be a little twisted if you had to date someone because they had feelings for you and you shared mutual friends. I'm guessing there are some things you do like about him, so those would be worth emphasizing if you get a chance. You are entitled to not be in love with him. If you have mutual friends, it might make sense to go the extra mile to be nice about it. It might also make sense to avoid whatever people are going to be rather opinionated about it.

    Just realize no one has a right to force a relationship on you.

    edit: and I understand about being wary of having your problem pigeonholed. MBTI labels can be a little like playing a character in a role playing game. There are way too many preconceived notions that produce erroneous conclusions about a real person.
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)

  7. #7
    Member Winz's Avatar
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    You can't just contradict yourself like that and expect a real answer

  8. #8
    soft and silky sarah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Water View Post
    First off let me introduce myself. My name is Rachel and I'm an ENFP. I am not new to typology, or socionics. I've been lurking on this board for a while, and I think a lot of you forget about the individualism of people and kinda don't like how all ENFP's do this or INFJ's are like that, its very stereo typed. So please don't stereo type me or my question and give me a real answer please. Don't assume I am a certain way just because I am an ENFP. I have a real problem and I need some advice. I'm in a relationship with an ESFP.

    He 'loves' me. All his friends know it, and I'll get my ass kicked or worse if I try to break up with him, or hurt him in any way. Does anyone know what I'm talking about? Help.

    If you don't want to date this guy, then don't. But if you want advice, could you maybe explain the problem using specifics?

    A person's type really has very little if anything to do with whether or not they're worth having a relationship with. There are so many more important factors to consider, including social intelligence, maturity, kindness, thoughtfulness, etc.

    Sarah

  9. #9
    veteran attention whore Jeffster's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sarah View Post
    There are so many more important factors to consider, including social intelligence, maturity, kindness, thoughtfulness, etc.
    Yeah, Sarah's right. Stay away from the intelligent mature kind and thoughtful ones. They are BAD NEWS.
    Jeffster Illustrates the Artisan Temperament <---- click here

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  10. #10
    Senior Member Lateralus's Avatar
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    Which is worse (long term), staying with him or breaking up? Make your choice. It's that simple.
    "We grow up thinking that beliefs are something to be proud of, but they're really nothing but opinions one refuses to reconsider. Beliefs are easy. The stronger your beliefs are, the less open you are to growth and wisdom, because "strength of belief" is only the intensity with which you resist questioning yourself. As soon as you are proud of a belief, as soon as you think it adds something to who you are, then you've made it a part of your ego."

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