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[MBTI General] easier to get on with a stupid S than a clever S?

Il Morto Qui Parla

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ok maybe srtupid is a harsh word, but...you'll all get over it. ;) and no-one is going to define themselves as stupid, so no-one need be offended

clever S's are very sharp, witty and observant...they can tear an N apart and they are very good at the things we aren't good at

a stupid sensor however can be almost like an N on some level, because they react slowly to sensual stimuli just like us,and they may actually fall back on some badly used N...making them quite tolerable, comforting etc.
jut a thought...but N's can use our bad Se/Si to get on with them at the same level of Se/Si ability?
 

heart

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I would rather be around compassionate S no matter their relative intelligence. If they show an effort to be compassionate and understanding about the little flaws I have that drive them nuts, then I can return the favor easily. It is just the ones who insist that I am the one in the absolute wrong that I cannot deal with.

I usually like ISFP because being INFP I can by-pass the S-N thing and relate to them Fi to Fi.
 

Il Morto Qui Parla

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yes clever ISFP's tend to have a certain maount of "class" actually...I think in fact my original post only relates to ESXX, because smart ISXX's are generally not that liable to be as "on the ball", and are more thoughtful

I've liked ISFP women before, but there have been things that drove me mad about them as well.
 

rivercrow

shoshaku jushaku
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type
I'd prefer not to suffer fools of any type, please.
 

heart

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yes clever ISFP's tend to have a certain maount of "class" actually...I think in fact my original post only relates to ESXX, because smart ISXX's are generally not that liable to be as "on the ball", and are more thoughtful

I've liked ISFP women before, but there have been things that drove me mad about them as well.

I agree with both statements. They do seem to be deeper and yeah the one I am thinking about drives me nuts sometimes on certain issues but she's so sweet and for the most part considerate that I can deal with it. She's a very good friend and she brings out a mischevious side of me and we have a lot of fun.

She doesn't think she is creative but she really is. She doesn't think she is smart because she is not very abstract but she has a smartness about practical things that I wish I had more of. She has a big heart, consideration and compassion which I count as a greater virtue in a friend.

Really I do not mind S types at all so long as they can accept me as I am as well and not try to control me or change me or tell me my way is wrong. It is the ones who think they are always right and I am always wrong that really irk me.
 

Natrushka

Pareo cattus
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I'd prefer not to suffer fools of any type, please.

Ditto.

I'm married to a brilliant, albeit very rigid, ISTJ. He does often think he's Always Right, however often when a solution to a problem presents itself, it turns out I was right. As a result, he defers to me a lot, whether it's because he loves me or he knows I'm smart (intelligence is a big deal to him); so I'm happy, too. We have Those Moments, but by and large it works for us. We have similar goals in life and we have similar backgrounds / upbringing. Having the same kinks doens't hurt either.
 

Splittet

Wannabe genius
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632
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INTJ
I would still prefer the clever S over the stupid one. Actually, all my S friends are very clever. But my friends all tend to have an IQ of 120 or more. I don't go very well along with dumb people, it seems like. I tend to act supercilious around them and not respect them.
 

Randomnity

insert random title here
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I have noticed that people strongly tend to get along best with people close to their own intellectual level, whether S or N. People who are far smarter are good for expert advice but too confusing/different for friends really. Likewise with people who are far less intelligent (though again they are sometimes useful for consultation in areas of their expertise).

I would estimate that all my close friends (both S and N) and almost all my acquaintances fall within say, 10-20 IQ points of myself (disclaimer: IQ is unreliable, inaccurate, and so on, but it is used here as the only objective standard I can think of). I don't have any genius friends and neither do I have stupid friends. All of the very smart people I know seem to hang out together, and likewise with the less smart people.

Perhaps if you are finding that you relate only to unintelligent people, that tells you something about yourself.
 

Il Morto Qui Parla

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I have noticed that people strongly tend to get along best with people close to their own intellectual level, whether S or N.

I disagree.

I'm friends with a group of clever N's.

there are lots of smart ESXX's at my uni who are very sharp and educated, but who I just don't get on with, because they'll have no patience for a whimsical approach to things. perhaps you think they're too clever for me, but I just don't think that. they're clever in a different way, but by no "objective" measure, ie academic ability, are they "cleverer".

However, I can find it easy to get on with not conventionally clever sensors, because they aren't pretentious. seems to me that smart S's I know are very concerned with the "appearance" of being clever and they need you to be always "on your game", something I don't do very well. the not so clever or educated ones just don't give a fuck, and I can relate to that. I guess I present a modest face ot the world on purpose, and they present a modest face to the world by accident, so we get on. however, smart sensors I know, at least the ESXX ones but often the ISXX ones when you get to know them, are very concerned with presenting a clever face to the world too.
 

Randomnity

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Being educated/getting good grades isn't the same thing as being smart, as anyone attending university should know. Many of the people I've met who get the top grades, often ISXJs, can get excellent grades via rote memorization without actually being clever (though some are clever as well, of course). I am not sure whether you mean genuinely smart or just able to get good grades, which any fool with a lot of time/patience can do.

If you do mean people who are actually intelligent, it surpises me that you prefer to interact with people whom you perceive as being below you in intellectual ability. You're the first person I've talked to expressing that preference. I would be so bored talking to stupid people, but I suppose everyone has different needs.

It also sounds as though you're saying that you dislike arrogant/confidently smart people, which doesn't make much sense, as that is a trait I have seen far more often in NTs than Ss (in general of course). It makes me wonder if you are assuming that people you see as smart in a "good" way are Ns, which may not be the case.
 

Il Morto Qui Parla

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Being educated/getting good grades isn't the same thing as being smart, as anyone attending university should know. Many of the people I've met who get the top grades, often ISXJs, can get excellent grades via rote memorization without actually being clever (though some are clever as well, of course). I am not sure whether you mean genuinely smart or just able to get good grades, which any fool with a lot of time/patience can do.

If you do mean people who are actually intelligent, it surpises me that you prefer to interact with people whom you perceive as being below you in intellectual ability. You're the first person I've talked to expressing that preference.

I prefer to interact with smart N's.

but if I have to interact with S's, often I find it easier to get on with the not so smart ones, because they are easier to deal with. a smart S can make you think you have these things in common, but when it coems down to it, you don't. it's the most frustrating experience.

well that's my experience. I don't think it can be "wrong".
 

heart

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I would take an emotionally intelligent sensor over any type who was really intelligent but cold at heart. I would also take a quirky, original person over a really smart but unoriginal meme repeater. I value people who have thinking hearts.
 

FDG

pathwise dependent
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clever S's are very sharp, witty and observant...they can tear an N apart and they are very good at the things we aren't good at

Sharp, witty and observant are independant of type.
 

Unique

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I think it depends more on what mbti type the S is rather than how smart they are.

You probably just get along better with say... an ISFP rather than a ESTJ for example

Of course how smart someone is factors in
 

Jeremy

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I don't think it's really a matter of intelligence at all. I think that a lot of the time, we ASSUME that clever, witty people have a preference for Intuition, or that whimsy and fantasy are solely the realm of Ns, but fail to realize this isn't the case. I think a big part of the problem is that, if someone doesn't agree with you, you might tend to label them a "smartass rigid S" wanting to stigmatize them. It's another form of stereotyping - I know many great, creative, fun-loving people of all MBTI types.

I don't know, this whole post just has this air of arrogance to it. It's like saying "I can handle the stupid people who notice details (but they don't obviously because they're stupid haha), but the ones who think they can handle me in a conversation I don't like cause they think they know everything, but I obviously know everything." I understand that this may be your personal experience, but this is just another way that the MBTI is used as a tool to stigmatize people that you don't like into one category. It just isn't meant to be used this way.

No offense intended, but that's just the way I saw this post. I'm probably not 100% accurate, but I just don't like this type of discussion about people of a wide swath of personalities all being lumped into one category and given negative traits.
 

Amargith

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I'm stupid.

I would take an emotionally intelligent sensor over any type who was really intelligent but cold at heart. I would also take a quirky, original person over a really smart but unoriginal meme repeater. I value people who have thinking hearts.


Jeff: no you're not (and if you are, then so am I). There are 9 types of intelligence, and EQ is one of 'em. I agree with Heart on this issue. EQ can bridge the gap between N's and S's just fine, as long as both sides employ it.

I work with two ESFJs and one ESTJ. And the ESTJ is actually one of the very smart ones that I get on with brilliantly (so far :)). In fact, its the IXTJ that I don't have a very good click with, not that we don't get on. But considering my preferences for INTJ, you'd expect it differently. She's just way less openminded than the ESTJ (these people were btw tested in an MBTI class in order to get certified in the system; they're psychologists). The resident ENXP is my fav new friend, of course. And although I get on with the ESFJs, there's one that feels more restrictive/judgemental to me, and it's not my boss, thank god.
 

Halla74

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I disagree.

I'm friends with a group of clever N's.

there are lots of smart ESXX's at my uni who are very sharp and educated, but who I just don't get on with, because they'll have no patience for a whimsical approach to things. perhaps you think they're too clever for me, but I just don't think that. they're clever in a different way, but by no "objective" measure, ie academic ability, are they "cleverer".

However, I can find it easy to get on with not conventionally clever sensors, because they aren't pretentious. seems to me that smart S's I know are very concerned with the "appearance" of being clever and they need you to be always "on your game", something I don't do very well. the not so clever or educated ones just don't give a fuck, and I can relate to that. I guess I present a modest face ot the world on purpose, and they present a modest face to the world by accident, so we get on. however, smart sensors I know, at least the ESXX ones but often the ISXX ones when you get to know them, are very concerned with presenting a clever face to the world too.

With what validity do you equivocate being clever with being pretentious?

Also, it seems like you dislike extroverts, and assume that most of them are pretentious too.

Finally, how do you that someone is "concerned" with presenting a clever face to the world? Everyone I know who is intelligent and functional tries to do the best at whatever it is they are engaged in, unless of course everyone is just pissing off and goofing around, so what does that have to do with "presenting a clever face to the world?" I think that's more likely a sign of a capable person applying themselves to the task at hand. They probably don't give a rat's ass if you or anybody else thinks they are clever or not, they know what their own capabilities/limitations are and are simply operating around them.

I know a few pretentious INXX folks myself. Any type can be pretentious, it is not a trait that is limited to sensors alone, or extroverts.

Thoughts?
 

Skyline

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Oct 17, 2008
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I think you are intimidated by smart S's, in particular by their charisma, and might feel inferior to them because you assume N's ('or less smarter S's') take a less "dominating situational position". *
The thing is you can "beat them right back" from the moment you'll believe in what you are saying the same way you think they believe in what they are saying. your spiderwebbish whimsical approach might actually be something challenging/interesting for them as well - just don't fear their self-assuredness when they talk about something they are good at.

* Halla74 put this well:
a sign of a capable person applying themselves to the task at hand.
 
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