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  1. #41

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    Ugh, exuberantly then awkwardly, then I just don't.
    "The purpose of life is to be defeated by greater and greater things." - Rainer Maria Rilke

  2. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThatGirl View Post
    How do you deal with ESTPs? You never really do, even if you think you are.
    I've decided its still possible you are dealing with an ESTP despite some of the behavior that seems a tad on the strange side to me. As this could just be a case of you meeting some "unhealthy" ESTP types.

    That said... the above quote is true but I wish you luck on improving your relations with us.

  3. #43
    Senior Member gloomy-optimist's Avatar
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    Ha, my bff is ESTP, and it's really kind of an art dealing with him. Basically, you don't ignore them. They don't like that, at all. Instead, stand your ground, but remember that half the time they're just pushy because....well, they are. It's not that they don't care about your feelings or anything. That's just how they do things, and they might not even realize it.
    Take what they say with humor. Question their motives. If they get dramatic, just sigh a lot and roll your eyes; even if they get insulted, they'll get over it, quickly. Yes, they do take things personally sometimes, but grudges really aren't their thing. They'll be presenting a new idea tomorrow with just as much zest.
    Once they learn that you really aren't interested in giving them whatever favors they want, they'll learn to back off a bit. Either they'll lose interest and move on to someone else, or they'll just kind of hang out with you for kicks. It's not so much because they're shallow or uncaring; it's just that they like to throw around ideas naturally, and sometimes they don't know how to deal with someone who doesn't know how to handle this part of them.

    Or at least that's what I've observed.

  4. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by gloomy-optimist View Post
    Ha, my bff is ESTP, and it's really kind of an art dealing with him. Basically, you don't ignore them. They don't like that, at all. Instead, stand your ground, but remember that half the time they're just pushy because....well, they are. It's not that they don't care about your feelings or anything. That's just how they do things, and they might not even realize it.
    Take what they say with humor. Question their motives. If they get dramatic, just sigh a lot and roll your eyes; even if they get insulted, they'll get over it, quickly. Yes, they do take things personally sometimes, but grudges really aren't their thing. They'll be presenting a new idea tomorrow with just as much zest.
    Once they learn that you really aren't interested in giving them whatever favors they want, they'll learn to back off a bit. Either they'll lose interest and move on to someone else, or they'll just kind of hang out with you for kicks. It's not so much because they're shallow or uncaring; it's just that they like to throw around ideas naturally, and sometimes they don't know how to deal with someone who doesn't know how to handle this part of them.

    Or at least that's what I've observed.
    Yep sounds like us lol pretty good observation. We do care about people... we just sometimes don't know what effects our words have on peoples feelings.

  5. #45
    now! in shell form INA's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThatGirl View Post
    they do always have a way of getting their way, but i think it is less stratigic and more that they are just bad ass and stuborn, and also they suck very very much
    This sounds correct.
    I only know two. I "deal" with them with hugs and raucous jokes. Works for me.
    hoarding time and space
    A single event can awaken within us a stranger totally unknown to us. To live is to be slowly born.
    — Antoine de Saint-Exupery

  6. #46
    Dali
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lukepd View Post
    I've decided its still possible you are dealing with an ESTP despite some of the behavior that seems a tad on the strange side to me. As this could just be a case of you meeting some "unhealthy" ESTP types.

    That said... the above quote is true but I wish you luck on improving your relations with us.
    I also wish your type luck on improving your relations with me. :P

    I apologise if some of my previous posts came across in a negative way but that was not my intention. Perhaps I have not been meeting 'unhealthy ones' and it may just be that I know not how to interact with them most effectively. This thread has yielded many good pointers that I can't wait to put to use.

    Thanks guys.

  7. #47
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    How do I deal with them...

    If they're being a problem I use words, then distance, then my fist, in that order. I'd rather take them snowboarding or whitewater rafting, though.
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

    INFP, 6w7, IEI

    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

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  8. #48
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    On a more serious note than my last post. And I'm still talking about the one male ESTP I know.. I usually just hang along the ride, try not to take it seriously if he's trying to get a rise from me. Humor is very good approach, listening to his interests is good just not giving in on the sudden ideas. Instead I like to discuss those with him in humor. If I want to get something from him, it takes patience and repeating the thing to him several days in a roll and standing my ground. I've actually gotten this to work, I did have to change approache couple of times and I think he got fed up, but hey.. Or maybe it was that proposition I gave him. Wel, it worked. Or I just go do it myself and watch him gape later..

    I'm going to confirm Lukepd's expression of "water off of ducks back" with the rare exception that I have gotten my brother seeking me out to find the reason why I'm pissed and trying to calm me down when I've done a "door slam". It just takes big mesures. In my case, I silently fume and shut all communications. I actually used to say he had a teflon surface, nothing got stuck to it.

    Meh. I like ESTPs.

  9. #49
    jump sleuthiness's Avatar
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    intercourse

  10. #50
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    On threatened me only because I asked him to pick up his litter. I just stood there with a on my face.

    ESTJs are fun. When I'm around they are prevaricating to impress. Correcting them makes it enjoyable.

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