I feel like this will be one of the costs for you (in the relationship) going forward if you guys ended up dating. I think it definitely depends on how much you value being understood, but it seems you are frustrated with the lack of open communication already and you aren't even dating yet! Maybe part of his hesitation to jump in is related to your understandable differences.
For me, ENFP, I often feel emotional understanding is vital. I don't know if I could survive without it. As much as I adore the ISTJ faithfulness, stability, friendly face to the world and caretaking abilities, I think the lack of emotional understanding would make me miserable. I flip-flop though. I like both sets of qualities. I WANT THEM ALL. Ha.
And, don't get me wrong, I'm all for differences cause I think it can make your relationship stronger, but at the same time...
Just a thought.