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  1. #101
    Senior Member batumi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by helen View Post
    Is that the one where they analzye various works of literature and fictional characters in terms of MBTI? I remember reading another book that referred to such a series. I think it was called Pygmalian something or other. Who wrote it?
    My series says Stephen Montgomery. The Pygmalion Project.
    (subtitled "Love and Coercion among the types", heh, heh)

    Fascinating reading, if you like literature on the whole.

  2. #102
    Senior Member batumi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PinkIceTD View Post
    Or I'll say something meaning for him to get the hint and he takes what I say at face value (or pretends to as to avoid deep discussions)

  3. #103
    IRL is not real Cimarron's Avatar
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    In regards to "reading between the lines" and "taking hints":

    One thing that may help is to remember that trust is important, so I trust you and don't expect you to lie to me. If you don't say what you mean directly, it could be misconstrued as lying (or something similar). Honesty is direct, with no need to beat around the bush. Dishonesty is evasive and indirect. In most cases, I'll give the benefit of the doubt, and assume there was no "hidden meaning".

    So on serious matters, I expect you to be direct. On not as serious matters, you don't have to be direct, but you still run the risk of miscommunication...

    When you ask a question like "Why don't you like my friend?" and I answer "I don't know" or "she's aggravating", if you feel like that answer isn't enough, then it may be that I can't really find the words to express it fully and completely. It took me a while to teach myself to do this, to search for a fundamental reason why things like that bug me, to link the pieces together inside. And then, of course, to explain it in words to the person concerned.

    Still agreeing with what's been said about relationships in recent posts, pretty much on the mark.
    You can't spell "justice" without ISTJ.

  4. #104
    Senior Member batumi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cimarron View Post
    In regards to "reading between the lines" and "taking hints":

    One thing that may help is to remember that trust is important, so I trust you and don't expect you to lie to me. If you don't say what you mean directly, it could be misconstrued as lying (or something similar). Honesty is direct, with no need to beat around the bush. Dishonesty is evasive and indirect. In most cases, I'll give the benefit of the doubt, and assume there was no "hidden meaning".

    So on serious matters, I expect you to be direct. On not as serious matters, you don't have to be direct, but you still run the risk of miscommunication...
    Good points and thanks for sharing them.
    I have found with my current ISTJ that being calm and direct is normally
    the best approach.
    Now, tell us how to evoke passion and romance from men of your type.

  5. #105
    Senior Member PinkIceTD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by batumi View Post
    Good points and thanks for sharing them.
    I have found with my current ISTJ that being calm and direct is normally
    the best approach.
    Now, tell us how to evoke passion and romance from men of your type.
    Yeah or is it only savings accounts and spread sheets that do it for you? j/k

  6. #106
    Senior Member batumi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PinkIceTD View Post
    Yeah or is it only savings accounts and spread sheets that do it for you? j/k
    Perhaps Cimarron will agree to some personal counseling sessions to assist us.
    We could ask Beat to help out too.

  7. #107
    IRL is not real Cimarron's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by batumi View Post
    Good points and thanks for sharing them.
    I have found with my current ISTJ that being calm and direct is normally
    the best approach.
    Now, tell us how to evoke passion and romance from men of your type.
    Oh and as an addition to the "trust" thing, it works in reverse as well. This is probably pretty true for everyone, but if I tell you exactly how I feel, tell you everything I can, and then you still try to dig for deeper meaning in my words--that can imply that you don't believe me, that you don't trust me. And that's major. It's probably not news, but I thought I'd throw it in there.

    Hmm...I don't know. That one's tougher to figure out. How to get an ISTJ passionate? I know I've gotten into it before, but I can't remember how (been a long time since I've had a girlfriend, truthfully). There's always something, though. It can be the simple things, like making a favorite meal--that's one of my favorites. But that wouldn't be "passionate", that'd just be full of the "warm fuzzy" feeling. Not quite as strong and lively. I'm really not the person to answer this question...
    Last edited by Cimarron; 10-16-2008 at 11:43 PM. Reason: serious paragraph
    You can't spell "justice" without ISTJ.

  8. #108
    Senior Member batumi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cimarron View Post
    Hmm...I don't know. That one's tougher to figure out. How to get an ISTJ passionate? I know I've gotten into it before, but I can't remember how (been a long time since I've had a girlfriend, truthfully). There's always something, though. It can be the simple things, like making a favorite meal--that's one of my favorites. But that wouldn't be "passionate", that'd just be full of the "warm fuzzy" feeling. Not quite as strong and lively. I'm really not the person to answer this question...
    Oh we will take warm-fuzzy, really. With gratitude.
    Anything that gets us to warm-fuzzy is also helpful.
    Are you saying when someone makes you a meal?

  9. #109
    IRL is not real Cimarron's Avatar
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    I'm talking specifically about favorite food, the one I never get to have. Making or getting, I suppose. But that's way too specific to work for everybody. We should wait for other people to give more advice in that area(at least I hope they do...no pressure, guys!).

    Maybe trying new things together, but nothing too wild. I'm too much of a beginner at relationships in general to give you any sure advice.
    You can't spell "justice" without ISTJ.

  10. #110
    Senior Member 2XtremeENFP's Avatar
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    Yeah! That definitely happens to me and the ISTJs, I know. I just don't ask anymore. I think it's cause they do not understand or have the vocabulary for it. Additionally, it would take a lot of energy to come up with an answer. It's annoying for both parties

    hahahaha.... I read somewhere that relationships between ENFP's and ISTJ's are usually successful because both parties are equally annoyed by one another.

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