[SJ] How do SJs experience crushes?

[Recoleta]

Try the innocent physicality test: Touch him in various ways, stand just a little too close; then observe his reaction. Does he pull away or allow it? If he's consistently okay with you touching him and being in his space, then he probably wouldn't mind getting even closer.

Poking him when he teases you is an especially good maneuver; if he ups the ante and teases you even more, then you can pretty much have your way with him then and there.

Thanks for the advice. Yeah, I have tried getting in his space a little bit, and he doesn't seem to mind. Although, he has told me before in general conversation that he hates it when people (especially strangers) touch him. I understand because I'm the same way really...my friends have even so kindly given me the nickname of "touch-a-phobe," even though I really don't mind being touched by people so long as I know them. Lol...let me just say that when he finally gave me a 2-armed hug it was a real breakthrough. Anyway, thanks for the advice ya'll, and feel free to keep giving more advice. Hmm I suppose if I wanted more INTJ's to read this perhaps I should have put the question on the NT section...

 

[FDG]

Thanks for the advice. Yeah, I have tried getting in his space a little bit, and he doesn't seem to mind. Although, he has told me before in general conversation that he hates it when people (especially strangers) touch him. I understand because I'm the same way really...my friends have even so kindly given me the nickname of "touch-a-phobe," even though I really don't mind being touched by people so long as I know them. Lol...let me just say that when he finally gave me a 2-armed hug it was a real breakthrough. Anyway, thanks for the advice ya'll, and feel free to keep giving more advice. Hmm I suppose if I wanted more INTJ's to read this perhaps I should have put the question on the NT section...

Touch his balls!

 

[Economica]

Touch his balls!

You've done a real turnaround, haven't you?

 

[ptgatsby]

You've done a real turnaround, haven't you?

I swear, I read this three times before I realised you used turnaround rather than something else.

 

[FDG]

You've done a real turnaround, haven't you?

It's your fault!

 

[Economica]

It's your fault!

 

[GirlAmerica]

It seems to me ISTJ's are very similar to me in that they are monogamous in their feelings toward an individual.
And, once attached, it is very hard to change or break away from how I feel.

 

[JediM05]

For me, it depends on how "severe" the crush is. If it is just a "mild" crush, I can forget about it real easily if either a) I realize it wouldn't work out or 2) I get to know her better and my feelings change about her. These "crushes" usually turn out to be just good friendships. However, in a "serious" crush, such as one that could have/should have resulted in a relationship, it can take a very long time to let go.

 

[Parsimony]

recoleta's response is on point and it feels like we're the one and same person!

 

[Donna Cecilia]

By definition, a "crush" is a strong attraction towards somebody, who doesn´t feel the same way for you.

As soon as I discover that the attraction is not mutual (which I work to find it out quickly), I don´t waste my time and mental energy on having a "crush".

They are just not made for me.

 

[strychnine]

I've never had a one-sided crush. However a good friend and I were mutually attracted to each other, at least "mentally" (as opposed to physically) a few years ago. I just ignored it though, I tend to minimize these things as I get caught up in an interest.